Buckle in for a long one so as not to drip feed.
Background - I am an only child raised by a single mum. My granny was at my birth and was my second parent until she died. Then it was just me and mum. We've been through a lot, and have had a bumpy relationship with lots of terrible arguments, but have also been pretty codependant on one another. To the point that when I went away to uni my mum considered selling up and moving closer to my uni town. She has done amazing things for me, funded me through uni completely on her own, but she is also quite domineering. She'll tell me how to do things, I'll kick back because her advice is wrong for me, she'll keep on at me until I doubt myself and do things her way, which inevitably backfire and leave me kicking myself that I wasn't stronger.
The dilema - as I said my granny was at my birth. I think both me and mum assumed that if I ever gave birth it would just be me and her. However in a shocking turn of events I got married and now have a husband! Our first child is due in 5 weeks. We've thought about it long and hard, and we'd both be more comfortable if it was just the two of us at the birth, me and my husband. However, I think my mum would be crushed if she wasn't there. She is already angry because she wants to buy big things for the baby but we don't need her too, she feels we're blocking her out. This would just add to it.
So, aibu to just want my husband there? And wwyd, would you include her to prevent hurt and upset?