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AIBU?

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Original poster

To ask someone not to walk down a footpath at night ?

483 replies

Nearlyoldenoughtowearpurple · 21/01/2017 23:50

We live in the country, at the end of a private lane. This is also a footpath.
For the last few months our dogs have been barking madly about 11o clock at night. We put it down to foxes but I find it really unnerving, especially if dh is away.
One night, just before Xmas, the barking was worse and it sounded like the dogs had got out. It was about 11.30. Dh went downstairs and opened the front door to see if he could see our dog but there was a guy standing on the doorstep. He said that he had come to apologise because he had been walking his dog in the lane and it had got through the fence into our sheep field and he thought it might have chased the sheep . ( sheep all fine in case worried).
He gave dh his card and said that he walks his dog at night as its not good with other dog. From his business card I think he is a bit of a techy up late at night gamer type anyway, who probably doesn't find it weird to be walking at that time.
Since then we have realised that it's his walking down the lane that upsets the dogs as they bark, shut up and then bark again in the amount of time it would take to go past the house to the end of the lane and then back again.
I have his email address, do you think it ok to send him a polite message, just explaining how much this freaks me out and ask him to not walk past the house after a certain time, pretty please ? There is a big field , with a footpath in it, just before the start of our drive so it's not like he couldn't walk anywhere, just not the ten minute walk up the lane past the house and back. Obviously I appreciate I can't stop him, just point out its a bit antisocial?
Am I being precious ? It just really scares me ( and dd)

OP posts:
Jaagojaago · 22/01/2017 05:30

OP ain't coming back.

Out2pasture · 22/01/2017 05:41

I had similar issues, I spoke to the person involved and it helped.

Mummyoflittledragon · 22/01/2017 05:55

Dh and I have always had dogs. They slept downstairs. My current dog is a noisy bugger. He screams the place down and because of this sleeps in the bedroom.

I grew up in a much more isolated location on a small holding. I wouldn't like to be alone with my child in such a location. That said, my parents were never burgled. I on the other hand had a burglar come in the bedroom when I was asleep and alone in our house with dd. I chased him out of the house. And I thought at one stage he'd come back because I heard more crunching glass - that sent me over the edge scared. Dd doesn't know about the burglary but still sleeps with me just over 2 years on.

This really is your anxiety to manage or lifestyle to change.

insancerre · 22/01/2017 06:29

Op is due back very soon to do the obligatory AIBU reply
Op: AIBU?
MN: YES!
OP: No, I'm not, you are all rude

tararabumdeay · 22/01/2017 06:42

It's a public footpath. The way to the church and work, historically, was the reason for the rights of way.

You decided to live and invest in a place with a right of way adjacent then please yourself with condemnation if someone, the free person, avails themselves of it at the wrong time of day.

I live on a road which is completely public - let's say Acacia Avenue. I can't stop Bob and his dog walking there.

londonrach · 22/01/2017 06:43

Train your dogs not to bark. You cant ask someone not to walk down a public footpath.

BitOutOfPractice · 22/01/2017 07:00

I wonder how many people's walks your dogs ruin with their aggressive sounding barking op?

Whatthefreakinwhatnow · 22/01/2017 07:05

This has got to be a wind up, surely?! Confused

Pluto30 · 22/01/2017 07:07

Also, OP, you might be concerned that your dogs are waking you up in the middle of the night, but have you spared a thought for your neighbours who undoubtedly hear it too?

It's up to you to train your dogs not to bark. If they're outside at night, what do you expect?

MrFartPants · 22/01/2017 07:08

So you know exactly who it is, have contact details on a business card and yet you AND your DH are still scared? 😂

MrFartPants · 22/01/2017 07:10

DD not DH.

aurynne · 22/01/2017 07:10

I love walking my dog at night. My dog doesn't bark at other dogs. If a neighbour's dogs woke them up because they barked at MY dog when I walked past, I would very much consider it their own problem, not mine. If they suggested I did not walk past their house at night I would probably look at them funny and ignore the cheeky request.

MsJamieFraser · 22/01/2017 07:15

Yabu OP, your dogs are you're responsibility.

Oblomov17 · 22/01/2017 07:16

Is this a troll?

Op?

Vamoosh

GinAndOnIt · 22/01/2017 07:31

This is ridiculous. We are on a farm, and we have a dog who barks at the sound of people nearby. I say 'thank you' if I know what it is, and then he stops. If I'm unsure, I'll say 'what is it?' And he'll do a scary bark till the threat has gone. Sometimes it is late at night. His barks are helpful, but he needs to know when to stop. He'd also have clocked the sound of this guy to memory after a few nights of the same thing, and stop barking altogether. I can't teach the fucker anything else, so he's obviously not some super brainy dog.

We can't moan about people walking through private fields, but then also restrict access on a public footpath. Ridiculous.

FrancisCrawford · 22/01/2017 07:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AwaywiththePixies27 · 22/01/2017 07:54

If it's a public footpath then I do think YABU BUT YNBU to want to ask, he can only say no right?

On our school run, we pass quite a few dogwalkers (we cut through a huge field if we have to walk), a lot of them who know they're dogs won't get on well with others will walk their dogs either at the crack of dawn or ridiculously late so it is believable what the man said.

AwaywiththePixies27 · 22/01/2017 08:02

Also, OP, you might be concerned that your dogs are waking you up in the middle of the night, but have you spared a thought for your neighbours who undoubtedly hear it too?

I agree with Pluto on this. My Neighbour has dogs. I'm usually of the live and let live approach as the area has a high crime rate and scared a burglar off from a nearby house before when their barking alerted the owner to look and someone was trying to break in. However, the week they decided to piss off on holiday and leave both dogs in the house for a fortnight, (someone came in to feed and walk them). They barked every night for two weeks and drove most of us up the wall with the noise.

kali110 · 22/01/2017 08:04

Yabu, massively. He is not being antisocial at all, he is just doing something you don't like!
You can't tell him where and when he can walk his dog.
It must be irritating and scary having your dogs bark randomly, but that's your problem, not his.
These are your dogs barking, it's not the fault of this man.
Btw a lot of people walk their dogs at night not just 'techy gamer types'. It isn't a weird thing to do Hmm

kali110 · 22/01/2017 08:06

pluto this was my thought too

SilentBatperson · 22/01/2017 08:09

Since nobody's called reverse yet, let me have the honour.

MargotLovedTom1 · 22/01/2017 08:11

"Otherwise he is perfectly legally walking his dog and not causing any problems..." apart from his dog escaping into a field full of sheep? For all the people saying the OP needs to train her dogs, I think the man training his dog is more of a priority.

I don't think a polite request would be that unreasonable.

Some really bitchy replies on here though.

DesolateWaist · 22/01/2017 08:21

From his business card I think he is a bit of a techy up late at night gamer type anyway, who probably doesn't find it weird to be walking at that time.

Really? DH is techy but isn't often up late gaming. But that's fine, you judge away. My nextdoor neighbours walked their dog at 3am last night. They aren't techy, but they are bloody odd.

Anyway, assuming that it is a public right of way you are being hugely unreasonable.
My house backs onto a large park that is open at all times. There is a footpath that runs right along the end of my garden. Knowing that people will be walking their dogs on it is part of the deal of living here.

7SunshineSeven7 · 22/01/2017 08:29

Worra I used to work in fast food and a mother came in once buying something in a huff and saying ''you shouldn't advertise the kids food, I have to buy them because my kids get upset if I say no'' as she handed me the money, like it was my fault she was there.

Your examples weren't that crazy - it happens Hmm

Original poster
Nearlyoldenoughtowearpurple · 22/01/2017 08:30

Calm down people.
Dogs are in the house.
They don't bark usually when people walk down the footpath, even with kids on bikes, dogs etc. It is purely because it's dark and quiet and the guy has a torch. This is the only guy they bark at.
We are literally in the middle of nowhere. The nearest house is a quarter of a mile. The footpath is our private road, that joins onto a grassed footpath into some fields. He never goes tha far, just past house.
I find it scarey because even though I know it's him, it's still freaky if you are alone in the house and dogs go mad. Might not be him, might be a burglar. Plus we go to bed at ten as all have to get up early for work etc so we are asleep at that point and get woken up.
I just thought that this guy is probably like my son who thinks it completely to be up until 3 in the morning and doesn't realise what's happening and that I could politely tell him and let him decide what to do

OP posts:
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