To ask someone not to walk down a footpath at night ?

[Nearlyoldenoughtowearpurple]

We live in the country, at the end of a private lane. This is also a footpath.
For the last few months our dogs have been barking madly about 11o clock at night. We put it down to foxes but I find it really unnerving, especially if dh is away.
One night, just before Xmas, the barking was worse and it sounded like the dogs had got out. It was about 11.30. Dh went downstairs and opened the front door to see if he could see our dog but there was a guy standing on the doorstep. He said that he had come to apologise because he had been walking his dog in the lane and it had got through the fence into our sheep field and he thought it might have chased the sheep . ( sheep all fine in case worried).
He gave dh his card and said that he walks his dog at night as its not good with other dog. From his business card I think he is a bit of a techy up late at night gamer type anyway, who probably doesn't find it weird to be walking at that time.
Since then we have realised that it's his walking down the lane that upsets the dogs as they bark, shut up and then bark again in the amount of time it would take to go past the house to the end of the lane and then back again.
I have his email address, do you think it ok to send him a polite message, just explaining how much this freaks me out and ask him to not walk past the house after a certain time, pretty please ? There is a big field , with a footpath in it, just before the start of our drive so it's not like he couldn't walk anywhere, just not the ten minute walk up the lane past the house and back. Obviously I appreciate I can't stop him, just point out its a bit antisocial?
Am I being precious ? It just really scares me ( and dd)

Petitepeach that's exactly it, thank you
Years ago I used to get my horse fit by riding horribly early before work. I purposely chose routes that avoided riding past properties that had barking dogs etc so as not to disturb people.
I think if you live in an urban setting when you expect noise at all hours it's hard to imagine what it's like when there's zero human noise between certain times.

You would have to have pretty good hearing to hear dogs barking inside a house a quarter of a mile away, inside another house in winter with windows shut. I really don't think my dogs can be accused of being antisocial

I do have curtains funnily enough
Unless you have blackout blinds however, you do see light through them

Fucking hell.

Turn it around. You are the man. You're already feeling a bit 'sheepish' because a lucky escape and your untrained dog luckily didn't savage someone's livestock. The owner of the sheep was kind enough to let it go and didn't make an issue of it. You then receive a polite email asking if you can take an alternative route because their dogs are barking.

Do you think
a) Fair enough, my dog is reactive, I know what it's like and they were good about the sheep thing.

Or

b) Fuck you, you're a nut job and I'll damn well walk where I like.

OP: AIBU
MN: yes YABVU
ONE LONE MNer: YANBU
OP: thank you One Lone MNer. I knew IWNBU

i would ask. it is disturbing you and he seems like a nice guy (sheep-gate). better if you can do it face to face, but if not a nicely worded, balanced email should be ok.

BitOutOfPractice - think you need to work on your counting skills .

Margot shall I tell you why I didn't?

1. I haven't got time. Got to get my dd to school
2. I CBA
3. Less impact to my dramatic statement

There's four good reasons right there

Dear me op
I would retire from this weird thread..... Send the email it may well have the desired result.

Bitoutofpractice
😀
You do know its Sunday? Schools not open
Just checking

She does want them to bark late at night when there somebody is outside - when there is a potential intruder outside. Not a man walking there on a regular basis when he could take an alternative route. Are people on here so bloody minded that they would not accommodate the OP in this case, when the OP was actually very accommodating to the man?

BitOutOfPractice - main reason: you just wanted to get in your snidey little comment.

I understand where you are coming from because my dog makes me jump out of my skin every time he barks in the house .... can't hurt to ask, but agree with you OP that it's odd that a stranger knock at almost midnight as regards the sheep - assuming you couldn't check the sheep until light in any case when he could have come round to explain ... also he must realise that your dogs go off on one every time he walks past and presumably there are no lights on so should realise this would disturb you, so he could have gone a different way before now and has chosen not to. May be an idea for your DH to be around if possible the next time he comes by and go out and say something then, like "just wanted to check who keeps coming past every night as the dogs won't settle and we can't get to sleep" and see if he's decent enough to say he will walk another way in future ... hope something works for you

Aaaargh, I give up! He is disturbing somebody! Have you missed the points I've made again and again about the OP being cooperative with him, so a little give and take wouldn't go amiss?

Margot
Why should he take an alternative route?
I don't get it
You really can't dictate to people like that

One of my neighbours goes to work at 3am sometimes on an ancient motorbike that he let's warm up for about 20 minutes. It disturbs my sleep and annoys me, but I couldn't ask him not to
Another neighbour has a security light that randomly lights up my bedroom like a blooming alien invasion. Again annoying, but what can I do? I can hardly ask them to remove their light
Sometimes we do just have to suck it up

That was to FrancisCrawford.

Yes, insancerre when we live in cities, suburbs, close proximity to others. He is walking a route in the middle of nowhere; he could walk a little way away and wouldn't disturb the OP and family. Why wouldn't you want to be considerate?

Margot he is NOT disturbing somebody. The OP is being disturbed by her own dogs. He is walking on a public right of way that he has every right to access.

It's really unfortunate that his dog once got in amongst the sheep, but he did exactly the right thing and immediately reported it to the owner - it's an incident that could have serious consequences for a flock potentially and knocking on the door even though it was late was absolutely the right thing for him to do.

I'd like the idea of knowing who it was, personally. You'll be more frightened if it happens again once you've warned him off.

Buy big crate/crates for your dogs and put them in at night covered with a big dark blanket or blackout cloth. If they hear noises they don't feel threatened so they don't bark. Worked with all our dogs over the years.

A lot of these responses are a bit odd!

OP has had a very polite encounter with this person, who seems nice enough, and has asked if she should write a polite email to ask if he would consider changing his route. If I was doing something every night and it was brought to my attention, politely, that it was causing such a disturbance then I would of course do everything I could to change that.

Just because the man has every right to use the footpath it doesn't mean the OP can't ask nicely. He sounds like a decent person who wouldnt react badly to such a request.

Even with all the updates and contex and everything it's still OP's dogs that are waking her up, not the man walking past.

Margot
I am considerate, I don't have a motorbike or a security light
But if I walk past a house and their dog barks, then that's their problem not mine.

I guess the man chooses this route because its a tarmac lane and its easier than walking across fields, especially in the dark