'I'm a bit OCD'

[Whosecoatisthatjacket]

As a precautionary measure I've altered my user name but would appreciate some advice in case I am being over sensitive.

A manager (not mine, but still my superior) has just sent out an email explaining something minor she has done by saying 'sorry but I have OCD.' She doesn't, she's just very organised and tidy.

I don't have OCD but did used to live next door to a chap with it. We saw so little of what he had to go through-only some rituals such as having to walk down his path repeatedly before leaving the house-but it still seemed crippling.

The manager did not mean to be disrespectful and the tone was clearly light hearted so am I being over sensitive to find it in poor taste? If I'm being reasonable, how do I raise it with her kindly without coming across as sanctimonious? Maybe I AM being sanctimonious??

I don't think you are being sensitive. Reducing the stigma associated with any form of mental ill health is everyone's business.

It is definitely a learning need on this persons part. Perhaps consider what you can do to raise awareness of mental ill health in your workplace, rather than focus on this person specifically.

It's a culture that needs to change, not just one person.

If people stopped saying 'I'm a bit OCD' and started saying 'I'm a bit Obsessive-Compulsive Personality Disorder' then they'd probably realise how silly they sound.

Anyone can have obsessions or compulsions without actually having a disorder. Anyone can get the shakes from a sugar dip without having diabetes. Anyone can get palpitations without having a heart condition. Anyone can like being fanatically clean and tidy without having an obsession. Any child can have a temper tantrum without having ASD or ADHD.

A lot of these disorders stem from what you'd call 'normal' behaviour but taken to the extreme and over an extended period of time and involving thought processes which can in turn lead to anxiety or depression and then coping mechanisms.

So, really, I'd say yes you can be a 'bit' OCD if they mean to say they are further along the line from mild to extreme than most, but since OCD is a diagnosis based on certain criteria, it's probably better to use a word which isn't linked directly to a diagnosis. I might say that I was a bit anxious about a particular activity, or that my anxiety manifested itself in xyz.

For instance there was a period in my life when I had to 'type' everything anyone said to me. My fingers twitched wherever they were as if typing out each word. If I typed well everything was fine, but if I had to 'backspace' or if they 'err' or 'ahh' whilst talking my anxiety would start to grow, I'd stop listening to what they were saying and I'd find an excuse to leave so that I could stop all the exhausting processes in my head which were necessary to get it all down on 'paper'.

This only lasted a couple of months and then it just stopped. I don't know why. My anxiety disappeared along with it. I was really doing it to myself.

I could have said I was a bit OCD, which wouldn't be true, but didn't meant that I didn't have a problem at the time which was causing anxiety.

www.ocduk.org/are-you-little-bit-ocd

Like many pp I have OCD (diagnosed), there have been times that it's been overwhelming, however it is largely manageable these days (following CBT and daily personal effort).

When people flippantly suggest that they're "a bit OCD" or someone who appears to be neurotypical claims to have OCD I feel a flicker of irritation, but that's where it ends. I have no interest in calling anyone out about it, it's not my business and I have no idea what battles they face. I'm sure to many, I appear nt, and that's just fine.

I get really annoyed when people use ocd as shorthand for doing a job thoroughly. Why do you need to excuse or explain the ability to do your job? Why is being thorough and effective something to be ashamed of?

My 11 year old daughter has OCD and has been under CAMHS for treatment for the last 9 months. This sort of statement really pisses me off. Her OCD has taken over our whole family's life. She is a mess and struggles on a minute by minute basis with basic functioning. I personally find it extremely offensive when people claim to be a "bit OCD" just because they like a tidy room. Let them come and spend 1 day with my daughter to make them aware of just how heartbreaking OCD is.

Cake "I work with someone who finds it incredibly difficult to actually leave work because he spends over an hour turning his computer off, checking its off, switching it on to see if he had switched it off, switching it off again"

That is so sad and brings back some memories for me of turning things on to check that are off! But I never spent an hour doing it. If you find it ever comes up in conversation would you feel confident to encourage him to seek help?

Thatstheway I'm sorry to hear about he difficulties your daughter (and wider family) are facing right now.

I don't have the silver bullet and I can't be certain it'll be the same for your DD, but I really struggled in my early teens (and at various points in my 20s), OCD (specifically invasive thoughts at that age) really affected me and everyone around me - but things did get better, and now in my late 30s, I live in a 'successful' way (married, have a child, have a job I like and friends I love). It remains a challenge, but I am happy.

I am a little bit OCD. I hate it when people are touching my monitor (even have issues with someone touching my tablet or phone screen) and when someone starts showing me something on my screen, all I see is the finger and completely blank out any sound.
I also can't concentrate when I see a grammar mistake in a presentation. Even my own. I just stare at the mistake, hear it screaming at me to be corrected.
And I think it's different from just being organised (which I'm not). It gets worse when I have a migraine. I was playing stack with my DH and before they copped on that I genuinely feel unwell about seeing the wooden blocks out of order, they made fun of me but they stopped afterwards.
I also have an issue with someone touching me when I have a migraine or my fibromyalgia is playing up and I literally feel sick and close to throwing up. Once again, I think it's different from just feeling uncomfortable about someone being close to you because you are not a touchy feely person.

I have compulsive tendencies, which I manage quite carefully and manage for the most part to keep in check. I would never say that I have OCD because I manage fine, and because it does give me a small idea of what that slippery slope looks like, and I would never want to trivialise that for people who really do suffer from OCD.

I think you can have mild/moderate ocd though and be "high functioning" enough that the term "i HAVE OCD a bit" might be appropriate. I class myself in this category. I've never been formally diagnosed as I've learnt to self manage it over the years.

It started when I was a teenager, I wouldn't eat anything prepared by my parent's without washing the plates and cutlery first. I still do this now in restaurants but I do it surreptitiously with wipes. It only really comes on now when I get tired and stressed, when I usually decay by staying up all night deep cleaning the house. I use bleach on my hands when I finish cleaning. I know all this is some form of ocd but I live with it and nobody outside my family really knows how it really manifests itself. They would describe me as "a bit ocd" and say that I am "just" obsessively tidy. (which I am). I'm kind of ok with hiding behind "she's a bit ocd". I don't think you have to have the rituals for it to be ocd (i do have to check the iron is off and the doors are locked but only a few times so no-one relaly notices)

I don't think it matters. People can use what terms they like.

Nobody knows apart from her. She may be different at home.

People use all sorts of terms about themselves: fat, OCD, weird, moron, mental. Meh let them

I think the problem is 'I'm a bit OCD' seems to have become a common everyday phrase, people use flippantly. Without much thought for those who actually do suffer from it

yes but maybe they are suffering from it "a bit" - or more severely behind closed doors. Not in any way to diminish the suffering of the poor people who have it severely and aren't "high functioning", can't leave the house etc. It's still quite wearing though to not be able to sit down and relax until the whole house is clean and tidy and have bleeding hands from cleaning for hours. That's only "a bit ocd" of course compared to people who are acutely suffering.

If it's any consolation to anyone whose children are going through that, I was much, much worse as a teenager and have learnt to deal with it as an adult.

though I get what you mean about some people using it flippantly. I'm just saying that it might sometimes be true.

I agree OP. My DH has suffered with OCD, and I find the flippant misuse of the term irritating.

I think used in this way, it serves to minimise what is a very destructive mental illness.

Some people who use the phrase do not suffer with obsessions or compulsions, which they have no control over, its used to describe trivial occurrences. Taking a symptom of OCD and making a 'joke' of their behaviour.

Something you wouldn't do with any other condition I can think of. Gives the impression that OCD is made light of and not regarded as a serious condition.

How do you know she doesn't have OCD?

I use the phrase "I'm a little bit OCD". I do have it, but am not diagnosed...... I don't want to be treated and loose control of my environment. BUT, because of the lack of treatment and diagnosis, this is how I refer to it.

I think I have undiagnosed OCD would suffice?

I certainly do not think it is good to make a joke if OCD but the way people sometimes use "a bit OCD" doesn't strike me as joking necessarily.

I think we are all more open about talking about mental health issues. Which is a good thing.

At one time depression etc was seriously stigmatized. People may say they feel 'a bit depressed'. Are they really clinically depressed? Maybe, maybe not.

What is the obsession with being diagnosed. I know I had OCD as a teen and early 20s but was never diagnosed. Better to talk about all aspects of mental health issues, without making light of them but without demonizing them. IMHO.

So OP in your shoes I would only talk to your colleague if your aim is to help her and not to police her choice of language.

I think 'appropriating' terminology to describe one's own behaviour is far less harmful than ignoring one's own harmful (self harmful) behaviour. Maybe more open discussion could actually help those who need it.

How can people say they have OCD without ever embarking on a formal diagnosis?

The key word is disorder you know, as in, a disabilty and there's a whole host of diagnostic criteria patients have to fulfil. If you're functioning well enough to manage daily life and not ever needed to seek medical help then you're more likely to be a bit obsessive or fussy about certain things, that does not equal a disorder

Diagnosis was a lengthy and pretty exhausting journey. Not just rocking up to a doctor saying I feel a bit obsessive and having a diagnosis slapped on me. You might suspect you have OCD or you might just have obsessive traits. You might have a different disorder which isn't OCD but features a need to control. In any case, you don't know and aren't qualified to self diagnose.

I think it's generally how it's used 'I'm a bit OCD' is used instead of 'I'm being a bit fussy', rather than I genuinely think I have OCD. It's quite a widely used expression, like its cool to have OCD.

I don't think there is an obsession with being diagnosed. I think for people with the diagnosis it was probably much needed to access support and understanding. Much like any other condition.

I think it's a bit obnoxious to say that people who haven't formally received a diagnosis can't possibly have OCD (or related condition, or any mental disorder really). I should have been diagnosed as a teenager. But I wasn't, because my parents brushed everything under the carpet and I left home at an early age (as a result).

Part of growing up and becoming an adult is getting to know yourself better and learning to deal with things. Being a parent turns your focus outwards. I thought about seeking help many, many times and, over the years, have made many appointments with the GP to talk about my obsessive traits, all cancelled (and you're right, I don't actually know if it would be OCD, I suspect OCPD more). But I don't think that means I can't have a (comparatively mild) disorder or condition. I just missed the diagnosis window and learnt to self-manage (which I was able to do because I don't have OCD acutely or have OCPD instead?)

I hope people that have obsessive issues much more acutely get diagnosis and help. I will strive to say I think I have an obsessive condition of some sort which I can self-manage now rather than I am a bit OCD. I do have a family member who has an official diagnosis of ocd and receives help for it, I promise you wouldn't realise it now whilst casually speaking to to her.

You can't tell who has OCD from looking at them, it manifests itself in so many different ways. Comparing them to someone you know who has been diagnosed is futile as we're all so different.

Currently my worst ones are hand washing and intrusive thoughts, meaning I have to repeat something over and over in my head or my family won't be safe. It can be quite draining sometimes, but virtually invisible to other people because my house is untidy (assumed to be the archetypal OCD) and much of it goes on in my head.

Being officially diagnosed isn't that important, if you have OCD you generally know about it! I don't tell anyone irl, I'd rather keep it hidden, but it really doesn't bother me when people use it flippantly, it's just a phrase to them and they obviously don't say it to upset or annoy anyone.