'I'm a bit OCD'

[Whosecoatisthatjacket]

As a precautionary measure I've altered my user name but would appreciate some advice in case I am being over sensitive.

A manager (not mine, but still my superior) has just sent out an email explaining something minor she has done by saying 'sorry but I have OCD.' She doesn't, she's just very organised and tidy.

I don't have OCD but did used to live next door to a chap with it. We saw so little of what he had to go through-only some rituals such as having to walk down his path repeatedly before leaving the house-but it still seemed crippling.

The manager did not mean to be disrespectful and the tone was clearly light hearted so am I being over sensitive to find it in poor taste? If I'm being reasonable, how do I raise it with her kindly without coming across as sanctimonious? Maybe I AM being sanctimonious??

Are you the word police?

Let it go

Why can't you be a 'bit OCD'?

I have a colleague who locks his car then walks off, goes back and checks and repeats this about 5 times.

His wife (also colleague) says he does the same with the front door. She often says he's a bit OCD. He's not diagnosed, she's not making light of it. I think it's a pretty accurate description.

OCD traits.. well many people are quite obsessive and particular by nature. A lot of people have certain areas of their lives which they are very particular over.

You can't be a bit OCD though. You either have the disorder or you don't. Of course some people have it more mildly than others but you can't have a bit of an obsessive compulsive disorder, no more than you can be a bit bipolar because your have mood swings, or a bit schizophrenic because you sometimes get a little bit paranoid.

I have a colleague who locks his car then walks off, goes back and checks and repeats this about 5 times.

My husband does this. He still isn't a bit OCD.

Maybe ask your manager is she actually does have the condition.

I hope she wouldn't get in trouble for telling you to get the fuck out of her business.

What makes you think this is acceptable userxxxxxxxxxxx?

Because OCD is not something to be trivialised and joked about

Honestly? You're going to say something to your boss, who, you know, decides whether you have a job, about her use of the word OCD even though she said nothing derogatory or discriminatory, but rather it seems, made a passing comment?

OP RL isn't MN. You'd be bonkers to take this further

Ail because if her manager does have the condition and has sent an email telling everyone she does, I'm sure she wouldn't mind people asking

Train trivialising OCD is derogatory!

U2

no more than you can be a bit bipolar because your have mood swings

Why is that?

Bi-polar covers a range of severities, symptoms and needed treatments. I'm lucky in that I have not been medicated for 20 years and never been hospitlised. "Extreme rapid cycling, mixed features leaning toward cyclothymic disorder" (taken from my diagnosis).

If someone said, instead of "a bit xxx", "I understand, from my admittedly shallow understanding, that Iexhibit some but not all of the symptoms of xxx"?

Mental issues are not like food poisoning where you can either test for a positive or negative result under a microscope.

In fact, an idea which has helped me come to terms with and manage my 'illness' is that we are all a bit bi-polar and that I'm more than most but less than some.

x-post

Userxxxx

Not true. Some people know about me and my bi-polar. If they had a specific question and couched it appropriately I'd happily answer them.

If they questioned my use of the term I would absolutely tell them to 'get to fuck'. If I were more controlled, I may write them a long email explaining professional standards and what I expect from my staff, cc'ing HR.

Firstly she's not trivialising it and secondly it's not discriminatory if she was, since she's not using it to discriminate against anyone

Ail I'm not suggesting that the OP question her managers use of the word, just that she ask if her manager does have the condition, rather than assuming she doesn't.

Train 'oh I've got a bit of brain tumour today' because you've got a headache!

Is no different to 'oh I'm a bit OCD' because you are organised or tidy.

It's trivialising and joking, If you don't actually have those things.

You either have bipolar or you don't. And yes it annoys me when people say they are a bit bipolar as well. My dh has bipolar so I understand how it covers a range of severities and symptoms. Cyclothymia is a mild mood disorder as I understand it. Mild, but it is still a disorder.

Mild is an appropriate word to use, saying you are a bit OCD doesn't make sense. You can't have a bit of a disorder.

Like I have said before, if people said they were 'a bit autistic' there would probably be an outrage. Having a disorder on the mild end is completely different to saying you have a bit of a disorder when you don't have one at all.

Well you don't get degree of brain tumour. You either have one or you don't.

But still, if you said that you wouldn't be discriminatory, just stupid. Do you think it's smart to tell your boss they're stupid?

U2

Yes, cyclothymia is milder, but it was only because my parents had money that I wasn't sectioned (many) years ago...

As I said, it has helped me enormously to think of anything like this, when pertaining to a range or non-binary issue, that everyone is on it, some more than others, some at the extremes and that it's only once it's above a certain level that you get help for it in some form.

I realise first hand knowledge is no arguement against the perpetually offended but I did feel the need to post my first hand opinion.

Honestly? You're going to say something to your boss, who, you know, decides whether you have a job, about her use of the word OCD even though she said nothing derogatory or discriminatory, but rather it seems, made a passing comment?
*
OP RL isn't MN. You'd be bonkers to take this further*

She is not my line manager and certainly doesn't decide if I have a job or not-my performance does that and my job is secure. I think the comments here show it's divisive and my post was asking if it were derogatory or not. Some people appear to believe it is, others not. To me, it's no different from saying 'sorry, I have a mental health issue ha ha' but perhaps, again, others would find that acceptable: that is exactly why I asked. However, to suggest not raising something because I should be afraid of being sacked? No. If I thought something were important enough I would always raise it and always have-and have held down my job, promotion after promotion, for a long time. As my previous update shows, I did raise it very gently and perhaps it will mean she uses different words next time. There was no harm done at all-in fact, she's emailed me perfectly amicably already today.

Thank you to everyone for the advice, I've read it all and am especially grateful for those with experience of OCD giving their view.

Train exactly the same as OCD, you either have it or you don't!

No one is saying tell the boss she is stupid!

God you sound like a nightmare

Well you don't get degree of brain tumour. You either have one or you don't.

Of course you do. There are different types of brain tumours with different stages and prognosis. Some even benign.

ali I'm not the perpetually offended. Not much offends me. This pisses me off but we all have something that pisses us off. I don't think it is fair to say someone is perpetually offended because they have an issue with people saying they are a bit OCD. Especially not when you have watched your child go from a confident child to one who struggles with every day tasks and has no confidence left.

You clearly don't have an issue with it and good for you but the perpetually offended line is getting old and is dismissive towards people who do care.

is dismissive towards people who do care.

It's supposed to be.

Sorry, going back to the brain tumour.

You might get a brain tumour that isn't as severe but yes, you either have one or you don't.

Just like OCD. You have it or you don't. You might have a less severe version but it's there or it isn't.

It trivialises a serious condition and increases stigma and it certainly doesn't help with others understanding of the condition, which is clear from some of the posts here

It's supposed to be.

Yeah, I guessed that.

It's a shame you had to resort to that tired old MN line because we disagree. Care about any issue and you must be a PO.

Anyway, I better actually go to work.