to think you get treated better if you are slim than if you are fat?

[Ambiencepetal]

I have been fat and slim and I did notice I got treated better when I was slim than when I was fat.

I found this article too:

www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/05/20/fat-discrimination-women-experiences-size-prejudice_n_3308012.html

Iv been both altho not obese or anything but a few stone heavier than I am now and was prior to weight gain and I don't think I was treat better or worse in general however I get much more attention from men than I did then ( that sounds big headed I don't mean it to I'm not exactly fighting my way through hoarded of admirers !!) but men I have know years suddenly saying I'm fit sexy etc I just role my eyes tbh because it's clearly all superficial

I'm on the fence. I've never been very fat or very thin , but I've been a good size 16 and am normally around a ten, and I'd say the only difference was I became more invisible to men when I'm heavier than when I'm slimmer.

Are people judgemental, yes I think some are, if they perceive you as very fat or very thin and I reckon both sides get their fair share of negative comments. However everyone is different in terms of what they view as very far or very thin.

Do I judge, to be honest, yes sometimes, if someone is excessively over weight, or excessively thin, in my mind the thought flashes through that it can't be healthy but it stops there and doesn't impact the way I treat the person and I'd never dream of commenting.

soubriquet - I just can't get over the fact people actually say that.

As an adult I have oscillated between BMI 26 (in which I got a few negative comments) all the way down to 19 and one thing I will say is that people are very weird about weight. I remember being ill once and losing 5 kgs over a 3 week period. The first thing people would say is - you look amazing. Fucked up or what???

I think it was after that I came to conclusion that people can judge / say what they want but I am not going to give a shit about any of it because most people are sooooo f*ing clueless about what healthy looks like.

Yes I think that's right. When I swell above a dress size 12, I feel myself become just a shade less visible and less important.

At a 10 or 12, people are friendlier and more helpful.

Yes I am another current Fattie and totally agree, but when slimmer I wore lovely clothes, accessories, bothered about my appearance more. People noticed me.

Now I wear revolving wardrobe of same clothes....In some ways its been lovely to blend in....walk down street invisible, but I want a last hurrah, before I hit 50 people def more friendly and chatty when slim too.

BTW I dont feel people judge me - and think" look at fatty in the corner with her same uniform on every day" but there is nothing about me, that is attracting people, its like peacocks, butterflies etc...

I also remember the thing of people making remarks when I dipped below an 8, but that was friendly concern even though it was inappropriate.

I'm slim and people constantly comment on my body, my clothes, hair etc in a patronising tone. If I was to do that to someone who was larger it'd be seen as totally unacceptable

I've been pretty fat for many years. At times slimmer (once several stone so, but still overweight) and am currently as fat as my past two month's eating deserves me to be.

When I am on the fatter side, I feel invisible. I probably project that as well. It's actually really easy to be invisible when you are fat.

When I lost weight I was prouder of myself and probably projected that too.

So when I am giving off confident vibes, I expect they are positively reciprocated. Which leads me back to agreeing that slimmer people are treated better - but I think we help that along with our own self-esteem and worth too.

Having been sizes 10 to 32 I deffinitely was treated better when a size 16 and under compared to higher sizees.

Oh yes and as a slimmer person now I get called "skinny " "What are you 8 stone wet through? " (no!) "don't lose anymore weight " " your bones stick out" I'm a size 10 and even at almost a stone lighter would still be in a healthy weight range for my height . So works both ways altho negative comments when slimmer seem to be from women and the whole being invisible to men was when I was bigger

100% agree

I was treated much worse when thin than I ever was when bigger. People think it's ok to have a go at thin people in a way they never would fat people.

Which leads me back to agreeing that slimmer people are treated better - but I think we help that along with our own self-esteem and worth too.

I tend to find people are sometimes more judgey, rude etc now I'm a size 16 and bordering on the obese weight range then when I was a size 12. I do wonder if it's just my perception though and if these people would be rude anyway.

I do think a lot of people have issues with others' weight though, loads more than I have with it myself. The thing is I may be fitter and healthier than them. I am not unfit, and have low blood pressure and low resting heart rate. They may well be less kind, generous, open-minded, warm and friendly than me. Being overweight is something I can change, changing your personality is a lot harder.

I have been both and agree with this post 100%

definitely yes. as a fatty, you are often either invisible or subject to patronising comments - to give just one example of circumstances where people think it's ok to comment on your appearance, whilst out clubbing I've had:

"but you have such a pretty face," (from a guy who then snogged my size 8 friend)
"don't let anyone tell you that you need to change," (from a random gay guy outside the club)
"hey girl, don't you be losing none of that deliciousness," (from a random dude on the street in brixton)

there are many equivalents across many areas of life!

True. Lost three stone recently and people are far nicer

Yes I've been both and agree 100%. It's surprising how many people judge on appearance.

I've been average size most of my life and overweight the last 3years. I definitely feel a bit invisible now. I can't remember the last time I got chatted up whereas it was a regular occurrence before. I can't say I've been mistreated as such. Maybe that's next.

I kind of think (having been size 18 and size 12 now)
That slimmer people can have

• prettier face (less fat / more shaped face)
• wear trendier / sexier clothes

So it could actually be these two things rather than the body size and shape

Definitely.

I never actually noticed when I was fat - I gained weight slowly, until I was obese (BMI 36), and people just seemed 'the same'.

But then I had health issues and dropped rapidly, and I can now say that I am treated much better at an average weight (BM 24, which is just not overweight, although still size 14-16, which some people above are counting as large!). It's not hugely overt, just people are nicer in general, and things get said that wouldn't have before "Oh, you're slim, so XYZ-good thing." It's definitely not that I feel better about myself - the loss was unplanned and distressing, and really the only good thing about it was how much nicer the world was to me.

I think I get slightly dismissed more - it's subtle though and I'm not sure how my self perception fits in.

I do find stranger talk to me a fair bit at the minute - I think that less weight more how "mumsified" i seem to be at the minute. I'm none threatening.

Though if you lose weight - people you know - family friends don't always react well.

Slim and thin are not the same thing but yes both underweight and overweight people do get unfairly judged

When I was thinner. And not poorly - hence younger, I got much more positive attention. I could "strut my stuff" down the high street if I wanted to because I was slim and fit, not chronically ill and a bit overweight. I don't think this is all to do with weight or age, but also about the persona we project.