Fiance's high school bffio demanding a plus 1 to our wedding???

[PenguinPal14]

I know weddings can be a touchy subject on here but I really don't think I'm in the wrong??

Fiance had a BFF in high school who he sees on occasion now for a drink but I wouldn't class him as a close friend anymore. Our wedding invites went out last week and his friend has already rang up to mention his girlfriend of 11 months (who I have never met) isn't on the invite. We mentioned that we simply couldn't afford to give everyone a plus 1, to this he replied that their other friend's gf had been invited. The other friend and gf have been together over 5 years they have a house and a baby on the way. After I tried to explain this to him he started shouting that we don't take his relationship serioulsy and thinks that everyone deserves a plus 1 unless they are invited as family ie mum dad son and daughter so they won't be alone (he will know more people that I do as bfs family is huge)

Is it customary to always give day guests a plus 1 if they're not attending with their family? Is this an unwritten rule that I didn't know about? If it is I will have a few angry phone calls on the way

Oh come on, it's not at all necessary to invite a plus one. Whilst it might be nice to invite one for people who know no one else there, at most weddings I attend I know a few people and I'm perfectly capable of having fun with friends without my husband there. Weddings are expensive and there should be no obligation to invite people you've never met over your friends.

If the guy doesn't want to go without his girlfriend he can decline.

OP YANBU. 11 months is not long really and more to the point you don't know her! There's no way I would have issued plus ones to my wedding do single people could bring random friends myself and my husband didn't know. How odd. We were always relieved our single friends only took up one space! Weddings are expensive.

Definitely don't think a +1 is essential - it's your wedding and you can choose to invite who you would like, equally they can choose to accept or not.
I can understand him enquiring as to if it might be possible to bring her, but should have accepted the answer amd made his decision based on that.
I'm in the process of planning my guest list and it's impossible based on what we can afford someone may become offended somewhere - be it because they are invited to the evening only or have no +1... I think consistency is the approach to take e.g. all work colleague no +1, all uni friends +1 single family members not etc.

YANBU. I don't think plus ones for people you have never met are the norm. There has to be a cut off somewhere as weddings are so expensive. If the guest doesn't know anyone else at the wedding and you can afford a plus one, great, but you certainly shouldn't feel obliged or be asked for one! The person can always choose not to go!

I didn't give some of our friends plus ones to our wedding as doing so would have meant cutting out actual friends. I hadn't even met these friends' other halves! One of them got really arsey with me and hasn't spoken to me since our wedding several years ago . I wish I hadn't wasted my money on him coming!

I've been to plenty of weddings where there was no plus one. I also have one coming up where DH isn't invited and neither is my young child, as the bride and groom hardly have any money and their wedding is a massive financial stretch for them. I'm just grateful my friend wanted me there and is choosing to spend her hard earned money on me attending!

What happened OP?