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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think it's not necessarily rude to correct the teacher?

258 replies

cherrycrumblecustard · 16/01/2017 17:38

DS is nearly ten, he's always been well behaved for the most part and very polite. But lately he has had a bit of an edge to him. He's told me today he's been told off and had to lose his break for correcting the teachers spelling. I know it depends on how he did it. From what he's said he wasn't that rude but is it the correcting that's rude, full stop?

OP posts:
DontTouchTheMoustache · 16/01/2017 17:41

Totally depends, if he put his hand up and said something along the lines of "excuse me miss, I think you have missed the E out of that word" it would not be rude.
If he shouted "Oi, numbnuts, you missed the E out if that word you slack get" then it is rude...

GraciesMansion · 16/01/2017 17:42

I'm a teacher and I don't think it is always rude, but sometimes it can sound like that because young children don't always have the skills to not make it sound rude! I wouldn't be upset by a child correcting my spelling, I would make a thing of 'everyone makes mistakes' etc.

KindDogsTail · 16/01/2017 17:44

What Gracie says.

Lweji · 16/01/2017 17:47

What did the teacher get for poor spelling, though?

I'd check it's true, if he's been rude and make a complain about it if it's true. It's better that the children correct the spelling than for the others to learn the wrong spelling.

Trifleorbust · 16/01/2017 17:50

It's not necessarily rude. It depends whether the child is interrupting, being smug etc.

SaorAlbaGuBrath · 16/01/2017 17:51

I'd say it's worth asking about. It seems a harsh punishment for correcting the teacher, if they're wrong they're wrong. How it was said obviously matters but I'd ask the teacher and go from there.

Trifleorbust · 16/01/2017 17:58

I seem to remember this happened to me once: I said, "Thanks" and fixed it. But if the child had said it in a disrespectful manner I would have called them out on it.

cherrycrumblecustard · 16/01/2017 17:58

He said he'd put his hand up and said 'excuse me, you have spelled that wrong' and lost his break.

He does sometimes have a bit of a condescending way in his voice.

OP posts:
SaorAlbaGuBrath · 16/01/2017 18:02

If he said it as he's told you, even if he did sound condescending I reckon she's been pretty harsh.

MollyHuaCha · 16/01/2017 18:03

Poor child! I do feel for him as I was a bright child myself and it would irritate me if I saw a teacher make a mistake.

I taught in a primary sch in an area considered to have more than its fair share of social deprivation. When I first started there, If I wanted a child to run an errand, this is what wd happen:

Me: Children, we're out of blue paint. Sally, cd you pls pop next door and ask Mr B if he has any we could borrow?

Sally: (goes to next classroom, throws open the door with a bang and interrupts Mr B's lesson by calling across the room from the door). Oi! We need it blue paint!

Result was one very irritated Mr B and embarrassed Mrs Molly when Me B later complained about rude interruptions. I learned the hard way and quickly changed my style of request to this:

Me: Children, we're out of blue paint. Sally, cd you pls pop next door, knock once at the door and wait for it to be opened, then stand at the doorway and wait until Mr B is ready to listen to you. When he shows he is ready, calmly walk up to him and say quietly, "Excuse me Mr B, I'm very sorry to bother you, but Mrs Molly has asked whether you possibly might have any blue paint we could borrow?" Then Sally, say "Thank you very much, Mr B" whether he gives you the paint or not, walk calmly out of the room and use the handle to close the door so it doesn't make a noise.

The point of all this is that no decent teacher should mind being corrected, but the timing and manner it is done will make a huge difference. Give your child the right phrase to use and talk to him about timing and using quiet voice. Smile

Shallishanti · 16/01/2017 18:04

I find it hard to imagine that not sounding condescending

WorraLiberty · 16/01/2017 18:06

Does 'excuse me' sound like something he would say?

I mean rather than starting with 'Miss' you spelled that wrong?

I'm not being pedantic, it's just something I noticed when my DC were lying to me. They'd often claim to use language that just really wasn't them Grin

Shallishanti · 16/01/2017 18:07

that was to OP not Molly!

Rixera · 16/01/2017 18:08

I had that happen to me once. I knew the other students would copy the word down wrong so thought it best to say something as she hadn't noticed.

She hated me for the rest of my time in school.

I don't care, as I know she envied me.

neonrainbow · 16/01/2017 18:09

I don't think a child should be correcting the teacher, no.

WorraLiberty · 16/01/2017 18:09

Oh and another thing mine used to do was to raise their hand, and still shout out.

It had to be pointed out repeatedly that the whole point of raising their hand, was to wait for the teacher to say "Yes?"

It took a while and few detentions but they got the message eventually Grin

cherrycrumblecustard · 16/01/2017 18:10

He does say 'excuse me' but it's often in an annoying voice! 'Excuuuuse me' and it translates as 'you are WRONG about something!'

OP posts:
ConferencePear · 16/01/2017 18:15

I sometimes used to make spelling mistakes. Some kids would call out out i gloating tone; others were more polite.
In the end my standard answer was, "Well done, I'm checking that you are reading properly".

OutDamnedWind · 16/01/2017 18:16

Perhaps time to have a chat about tone and how things can be taken different ways depending on how we say it, and that we can sometimes upset/annoy people without meaning to.

MyBonnieLiesOverTheOcean · 16/01/2017 18:18

I think it does depends on circs and the time of voice.

I corrected a teachers spelling once. She had spelled their as thier. I was only 7 and a shy child so I know I wasn't arsey about it but she was very confrontational and aggressive and insisted that I got up in front of the class and looked it up in a dictionary to prove I was wrong. She hated me with a passion after that episode.

MrsDustyBusty · 16/01/2017 18:20

OP, you seem pretty sure that he was quite rude in how he chose to say this to the teacher and are pretty certain that it wouldn't be outlandish and without precedent. So I'd probably tell him that missing his break might give him reason to have a little think about acceptable ways to deal with situations.

cherrycrumblecustard · 16/01/2017 18:20

No, I'm not dusty, just saying he can have a "tone" sometimes, it's a recent thing

OP posts:
PigletWasPoohsFriend · 16/01/2017 18:23

But lately he has had a bit of an edge to him

I would check with the school to make sure this wasn't something he has beven warned about before.

Prehaps this was 'another' incident iyswim.

MissBeehiving · 16/01/2017 18:25

DS corrected the Ofsted inspector during a maths investigation, to the delight of the deputy head who was teaching the lesson. But he does normally do it quite sensitively, along the lines of "I can't get the calculation to work - is that number right?"

Headofthehive55 · 16/01/2017 18:26

Sometimes it's best to keep quiet.

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