"Heartbreakingly pretty"

[2beesornot2beesthatisthehoney]

Watching ITN news right now. Tragic awful story about the death of a young girl. Teenager helping with enquiries I think. Anyhow the point at which I thought FFS was when a picture was shown of the young girl whose death was described as "all the more tragic" because she was "heartbreakingly pretty". It would be sad whatever , not because of how she looks. It's a terrible story but what a comment by the reporter?
AIBU?

It is the very fact that this little girl has just been murdered that makes this thread utterly relevant and timely. Her death is immediate, tragic, concerning and terrible. And in the immediate wake of this, what is being said about her is that she was pretty, which makes all of that apparently worse. This is absolutely the right time to notice and comment on that.

Not being funny but I very much doubt the mother would be on Mumsnet right now

Ah well that's ok then...

hopper yes, I assume that after their beautiful child was murdered they would absolutly agree that the reporter shouldn't have called her pretty. Absolutely

Yes I agree man

Not quite the same point but anyone in the army who gets killed in conflict is described as a "hero" and their commanding office will talk about them as being excellent at their job, admired by their colleagues etc. I'm sure plenty of soldiers are average at their work, and may not be well liked by their colleagues, but their lives are worth the same.

I don't believe the reporter said tat it was 'all the more tragic because she was heartbreakingly pretty.'

I don't believe it.

People who get killed while they are doing their job Are heroes. Jesus wept what is wrong with you people?

Well several posters heard it bog and to be fair it is only falling back on well worn cultural narratives.

People who get killed while they are doing their job Are heroes

Really? Always?

What is wrong with people who utterly refuse to think critically or for longer than 5 second about anything, is the more interesting question to me.

Can't read all of this as all seems to irrelevant

There's been a murder of a child ........by another Child .....a 15 year old

Please MUMSNET if a few folk even suspect that this may be upsetting for the victims mother .....then remove this thread

It's insensitive and diverts from the shock of this horrific tragedy

potnoodle - I think u are confused as maybe u haven't read the whole thread- the initial point of this thread was basically "if a horrendous crime/murder has been committed - isn't it wrong that the reporting of said crime should have any mention of whether the victim was pretty or indeed any comment on the victims appearance at all" - because it's really not relevant is it?
Most people on here agree that the reporter was probably flustered/struggling for words but that it was inappropriate.

As was said earlier, if u find the discussion distasteful for some reason u do not need to continue in the conversation.

Absolutely awful comment from the reporter and one I'm sure he now thoroughly regrets.

OP, I can see why you started the thread.

Spider I'd argue that reporters claiming the tragedy of her death is the greater because she was pretty is what diverts from the shock of the tragedy. Her death is tragic enough - why the need to qualify it with how pretty she was?

There has been no specific mentioning of the details of the crime spiderbaby - the op was about one particular report of the incident on ITN and that the words used were inappropriate.

It is basically a thread about society's obsession with looks and the wider issue.

I was once given a very hard time on mumsnet after a police officer was killed on duty because I objected to her commanding officer referring to her as a "bubbly girl".

Many posters were convinced that, had she been a man, the term "bubbly boy" would have been used.

bertrand

Great - MNers come on here and have a go at the reporter, not the person who killed the child...I know they were only 15 but come on. The reporter is not the bad guy here. Anyone can say something stupid.

I really do wonder at the sanctimoniousness (and priorities) of the mothers on this site at times.

This is a thread ABOUT the reporting and not the crime purple.

I've noticed that when young males are in the news, that the language used about them changes as well - so an 17 or 18 year old male killed in a tragic way is usually described as a 'teenager' where a 17/18 year old male committing a crime is a youth or man.

Missing the point purple

myfavourite, I'm pretty sure it's up to a court of law to decide who killed the child.

Not Mumsnet...

It's just more proof on the insidious way girls and women are judged so much on looks
Very sad reflection on our society

My dd had a big reward ceremony
At school where one girl and one boy was selected from each year and given an award based on values really like kindness determination etc

Anyway every child that was called up to get the award
The head teacher made comments about that child

So out of 7 boys and seven girls
About five girls where commented on by the head on front of everyone about their looks
Being called gorgeous etc by the head

Yet no one looks based comment was made about ANY boys

And then there was two girls who weren't called pretty etc

Insidious

#any untimely death is tragic, we don't need to quantify it in terms of attractiveness"

THIS ^ from Rhoda

ExConstance your point would only be relateable if, following the death of a soldier, the reporter had said it was 'all the more tragic because they were a hero'. This implies a category of soldiers who die who are not heroes.

So in terms of teh reporters words, there are girls/children who are murdered in a scenario which could be described as 'less tragic' because their looks are not deemed 'heartbreakingly pretty'.

It was dreadful reporting, it does indeed highlight a wider issue in society about the value of females based upon their looks. MN thank you for allowing this important discussion to continue.

It goes without saying that the death of a child through violence is horrific and all sympathies go out to her family, etc. However, as MN have stated on this thread, there is another thread for expressing those sentiments.

Could you not have waited a while OP?