Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to despair that...

40 replies

Niamer · 09/01/2017 21:48

1.The Tories are planning to drive us off a cliff edge?

  1. I don't recognise the open country I have spent the last four decades in?
  2. Brexit is going to cause an economic hit when we have already been hit and don't need to be hit any more thank you?
  3. Not THAT many people seem worried enough about the above to do anything? (with honourable exceptions). My (intelligent) friends are posting on FB "Which Little Miss Character am I?" quizzes, whilst I feel permanently incredulous and scared at what is happening to my country?
Mods - please don't move this to the EU ref corner - it is not just for the active Leavers and Remainers to answer - it would be interesting to have some views from the middlies TIA Thanks
OP posts:
TrojanWhore · 09/01/2017 21:51

YANBU to despair, because everyone's opinion is valid.

I think that's the only AIBU question you've actually asked.

Heratnumber7 · 09/01/2017 21:53

1.The Tories are planning to drive us off a cliff edge? No they aren't

  1. I don't recognise the open country I have spent the last four decades in? Why not?
  2. Brexit is going to cause an economic hit when we have already been hit and don't need to be hit any more thank you? No it isn't
  3. Not THAT many people seem worried enough about the above to do anything? (with honourable exceptions). My (intelligent) friends are posting on FB "Which Little Miss Character am I?" quizzes, whilst I feel permanently incredulous and scared at what is happening to my country?
You are believing all the scaremongering in the press
Original poster
Niamer · 09/01/2017 21:59

Thanks Haratnumber7, though I don't feel terribly reassured. I have done a huge amount of research since the vote from a variety of sources and all experts (I know we're not meant to bother with them any more) I respect have the same view as me.

This book extract by Ian Dunt gives a helpful glimpse into what we can expect:
truckerworld.uk/posts/2016/11/the-hard-brexit-cliff-edge-blocked-roads-empty-shelves-a-country-waiting-to-be-exploited/

OP posts:
Heratnumber7 · 09/01/2017 22:02

People have a tendancy to read things they agree with,or that reinforce their opinion.

Renniehorta · 09/01/2017 22:03

YANBU

However I am glad to say that all my friends are as worried about all this as me. We are not getting over it or sucking it up. We discuss it endlessly often in French which just seems to add an extra frisson.

Many friends have like me been abused on online forums because we have voiced our worries and fears about the future.

peppatax · 09/01/2017 22:07

There's nothing you do about any of the above as an individual OP, nor can your friends. So focus efforts on keeping your own house and life in order so that you can weather any storm from the above statements.

Also YABU to suggest that the Tories are to blame, if you're looking back over 40 years then there is plenty of other political damage that we are paying the price for even now.

OliviaBensonOnAGoodDay · 09/01/2017 22:10

I agree with you, but I don't quite know what to do about it. I sign petitions, I've been on marches, I volunteer in my local and wider community, but I don't think I've made any difference.

I'm going to prove that internet rule right and mention the Nazis (although you could substitute them with other chaotic times in other countries too). I remember learning about them in school and wondering how on earth ordinary people just let it all happen, and why no one tried to stop them. But I feel like I understand now.

It's not just Brexit, before anyone jumps on me, although I did vote Remain and I still believe leaving is a mistake that will cost us dearly, in lots of ways. I work in social care and it's the erosion I've seen of the NHS, social services, our police force, in education, the lack of consideration given to very real threats like air pollution and climate change.

I'm sure lots of people will tell me I'm being silly and everything will work out fine in the end. I hope they are right. I just worry what will happen in the meantime.

Original poster
Niamer · 09/01/2017 22:11

People have a tendancy to read things they agree with,or that reinforce their opinion.
Yes I partly agree. I have had loads of discussions with Leave voters as well as my Remainer-turned Leaver M.P whom I respect(ed) and have very much considered "getting behind Brexit" but have heard not a thing to convince me.

OP posts:
Original poster
Niamer · 09/01/2017 22:15

There's nothing you do about any of the above as an individual OP, nor can your friends.
Yes, it feels that way but bad things happen when good people do nothing. I have never before 2016 been remotely tempted to be an activist, but actually this time it is impossible for me to do nothing. I have shocked myself.

OP posts:
peppatax · 09/01/2017 22:17

Bad things happen when good people do everything too OP

WorraLiberty · 09/01/2017 22:18

Not THAT many people seem worried enough about the above to do anything? (with honourable exceptions). My (intelligent) friends are posting on FB "Which Little Miss Character am I?" quizzes, whilst I feel permanently incredulous and scared at what is happening to my country?

And bumping your gums on Mumsnet is doing more than posting about Little Miss characters?

How? Confused

Original poster
Niamer · 09/01/2017 22:24

And bumping your gums on Mumsnet is doing more than posting about Little Miss characters?

It isn't doing any more Worral. Most posts are helpful to me in seeing where other people are at. Remainers are at risk of being in an echo chamber with fellow remainers, arguing with staunch leavers or not able to discuss it at all at work. I love Mumsnet as you get a whole range of views.

I do very little bumping my gums on Mumsnet these days as I have been doing all I can to fight against a hard destructive Brexit. It is exhausting, as someone said earlier, as as an individual one feels pretty helpless.

OP posts:
Original poster
Niamer · 09/01/2017 22:26

Bad things happen when good people do everything too OP
That's an interesting thought. I can't think of too many examples of this in history.

OP posts:
peppatax · 09/01/2017 22:27

So stop trying to fight a 'hard destructive Brexit' if it is that exhausting. Nothing will change. Regardless of what camp people are in, my bugbear is that people refuse to see that there may be some silver linings from Brexit after all. Just because you don't see them now doesn't mean they aren't there. Much like divorce Wink

Original poster
Niamer · 09/01/2017 22:29

I agree with you, but I don't quite know what to do about it. I sign petitions, I've been on marches, I volunteer in my local and wider community, but I don't think I've made any difference

Similar here Olivia. We have started a local pro- EU group, which has been good for all our sanity if nothing else.

OP posts:
Original poster
Niamer · 09/01/2017 22:32

there may be some silver linings from Brexit after all
Can you think of any Peppa, or are you ever the optimist? Wink

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 09/01/2017 22:35

I do very little bumping my gums on Mumsnet these days as I have been doing all I can to fight against a hard destructive Brexit.

Like what?

peppatax · 09/01/2017 22:44

I'm ever the optimist. When it gets to the point that something has to change - public services being crippled for starters - then there has to be a silver lining from initiating a change. They might not be apparent or benefit everyone but they will happen.

Now that Brexit is on the cards, personally I think that the long term gain is a stronger and more balanced economy, more diverse immigration (ROW immigration capped in the last 10 years to offset mass EU immigration), independent trade agreements with BRIC nations/emerging economies that the EU has failed to deliver on, I could go on but it's late!

Original poster
Niamer · 09/01/2017 22:50

Thank you Peppa. I really hope public services don't crumble even more in the meantime, but time will tell.

OP posts:
Original poster
Niamer · 09/01/2017 22:59

*I do very little bumping my gums on Mumsnet these days as I have been doing all I can to fight against a hard destructive Brexit.

Like what?*

Written to M.P, MEPS, Lords, met with M.P, formed a local pro- EU group that has a weekly stall in our town centre, been on three marches, joined the Lib dems and started to get involved locally despite being a political novice, written to local papers, national papers, written a report for the Government on the benefits of Erasmus, signed more petitions than I've had hot dinners, bored my friends and family to death...

OP posts:
Zafodbeeblbrox10 · 09/01/2017 23:09

You're right..we're all screwed unless people decide to observe their wider worlds

Original poster
Niamer · 09/01/2017 23:12

You're right..we're all screwed unless people decide to observe their wider worlds

I think they may start to soon...

OP posts:
Mistletoekids · 09/01/2017 23:13

You're right

What Olivia bums said

WorraLiberty · 09/01/2017 23:14

Oh right.

Still it makes you look a bit can I say 'dickish'? to have a pop at your (intelligent) friends and their Facebook activities.

If you are to become an activist, you'll have to learn not to do that.

You'll catch more flies with honey and all that.

Good luck with it all.

Original poster
Niamer · 09/01/2017 23:23

Still it makes you look a bit can I say 'dickish'? to have a pop at your (intelligent) friends and their Facebook activities

I don't have a pop at them. Mumsnet is handy for airing things that you can't say to people in RL isn't it? I love my friends; I am just shocked at how they cannot be concerned. Then again, I expect I have snoozed my way through humanitarian crises and all sorts of injustices that really bothered them and I was too lazy to do anything about.

Thank you.

OP posts: