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AIBU?

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Original poster

To have been shamed at the gym

311 replies

Bonbon12 · 04/01/2017 20:42

I am a plus size lady who has made it her New Years resolution to lose weight. I joined a gym in December and mainly use the pool. I suffer from knee pain so I have to use the pool for my exercise I can't do running or bike.

So I do little bit of swim-hops/walking which helps my knee and also helps me lose weight. When I arrived I went into the fast lane as it was completely empty and was the smallest lane. It suddenly got really busy and that made other lanes quite busy.

Then two men moved into my lane. They started a fast swim. I asked them could they wait another 15 mins for me to finish and that I have a knee problem so this is helps me.

They replied that "that's not our problem and that the pool was for those who do real exercise". I replied it is real exercise and then I heard one of the men mutter "it's not the lard lane" and I left straight away.

Aibu to think that these men are complete cunts.

OP posts:
HappyLittleCloud · 05/01/2017 09:23

Aeroflotgirl I did not mean the term 'dicking about' in the context of people following appropriate exercise routines including walking in a pool, I apologise if it reads that way. It was more thinking along the lines of being silly and messing around... which is also fine in a pool in the correct area. I hope I haven't offended anyone.

Aeroflotgirl · 05/01/2017 09:26

Oh ok happy 😉

ThisYearWillbeBetter · 05/01/2017 09:26

The men were very rude, but you were just as unreasonable using the clearly designated fast lane, and expecting to have it all to yourself, and telling other gym members to wait until you're finished.

If you had behaved like that at my gym (which is local, friendly and has members of all ages, shapes, and sizes) then I would have had a quiet word with one of the gym instructors who would have had a quiet word with you about appropriate gym usage.

You're to be commended for your efforts to get fit, but you don't have more rights than others to do their preferred exercise. The fast lane is there for a reason.

trinity0097 · 05/01/2017 09:31

The pool I used to swim at had half the pool set out as lanes and half as open water, I generally used the open water as I was slower than the slow lane and needed the steps to get in and out.

Was the issue partly that the fast lane was next to the steps and you had no way of getting to the slower lanes or getting out if you had got in a middle lane (always easier to get in than out)

Do they have sessions where it's not just lanes when you could go?

TheMaddHugger · 05/01/2017 09:32

OP, sweetie. I am a size au/uk 24. I also exercise in a pool. But always in the shallows with the other exercise people.

Asking them to wait 15 isn't good/right

((((((squishy Hugs))))))

QueenLizIII · 05/01/2017 09:46

How on earth does hopping round a pool help someone to lose weight?

the same way any movement does?

Any personal trainer, Dr, etc will tell you that diet is 80% of weightloss

Even high impact aerobics will do nothing if you dont change your diet. A high impact class burns about 500 calories easily replaced by eating a large bag of crisps.

Low impact exercise (like walking up and down a pool) does absolutely nothing for weight loss unless you're making changes in your diet.

It simply isnt true that any movement makes you lose weight. Diet is most of it.

TheMaddHugger · 05/01/2017 09:52

I agree QueenLizIII . I am not focusing on weight loss. just trying to get some movement back after injury.

I think the OP would benefit from an actual pool exercise class

TheNaze73 · 05/01/2017 10:00

QueenLiz is spot on. Whilst exercise can act as a catalyst alongside a diet, the lion share of the weight loss, will be through reduced calorie intake.

The men could have put it nicer to you but, asking them to wait 15 minutes was royally taking the piss

user1483387154 · 05/01/2017 10:00

I think the men were extrememly rude with their personal comments towards you.

You were in the wrong with not moving from the fast lane straight away. It was specified for fast swimmers which you know you are not. Fair enough when no one else was there but as soon as someone arrived to use it you should have moved.

Dont give up, does the pool do aqua fit classes? That may be useful to you

SomewhatIdiosyncratic · 05/01/2017 10:01

Can we have a lane for "genteel breaststoke while keeping hair dry"? Separated by a perspex screen for hair preservation and protection of the "splashy action man front crawlers" so they don't suffer dirty looks Grin

Each pool needs at least 15 lanes to accommodate each type of swimmer in a harmonious way ;-)

PurpleDaisies · 05/01/2017 10:04

Can we have a lane for "genteel breaststoke while keeping hair dry"?
In my pool that would need to be an extra wide lane for people who want to swim next to each other and have a conversation totally oblivious to anyone else in the pool.

And a "wandering jellyfish" lane for people that don't like to swim in anything like a straight line.

Don't forget the "insecure man" lane for men that don't like being outpaced by a woman and won't let you overtake.

JoffreyBaratheon · 05/01/2017 10:11

What a pair of nobs.

You've realised you want to get fitter and you're going about it. That's bloody brilliant. You're a hero. The fact they fat shame, says a lot about them as people and it's all unflattering. Whatever anyone's size, they can be a brave and brilliant person or a dick and losing or gaining weight won't alter that underlying truth.

Carry on doing what you're doing. But maybe at another gym. If that's possible.

Are you sure you can't cycle? I thought cycling, like swimming, was weight bearing. I ask because I can cycle but can no longer run - and the good thing about cycling is it's you out there on your own (or in a supportive group), where you aren't having to vie for space with utter nobs. Incidentally, what animals bring these people up? If my sons spoke to anyone like that they'd be shamed by me.

BarbarianMum · 05/01/2017 11:05

Not necessarily - it depends on whether the diet you eat is making you put on weight or just maintaining it. If your diet is healthy and a 'maintaining weight' diet then keeping it the same whilst increasing exercise will make you loose weight and tone muscle and do all sorts of good things for your heart etc.

I am obese but haven't put weight on for years - ever since I sorted out my diet. So I have 2 options for losing the excess weight - eat less or move more (I'm doing both).

MakaiTenjyo · 05/01/2017 12:07

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bruffin · 05/01/2017 12:11

if op hadnt been rude in the first place she wouldnt have had a rude mutter under the breath reply in the first place.

YetAnotherSpartacus · 05/01/2017 12:24

Can we have a lane for "genteel breaststoke while keeping hair dry"?
In my pool that would need to be an extra wide lane for people who want to swim next to each other and have a conversation totally oblivious to anyone else in the pool.

Errr... that would be me ... except that the main issue is recurring ear infections and a predilection towards eczema on my face, exacerbated by chlorine. I don't swim next to anybody and can often outpace the (mainly male) try-hards who do the forward thrash. TBH walkers in the slow lane can be annoying unless they move out of the way for those of us who actually do swim. Best they use the general swim areas if they exist.

ALittleMop · 05/01/2017 12:35

Don't forget the "insecure man" lane for men that don't like being outpaced by a woman and won't let you overtake.

haha so true. I am in my 40s and a size 16 and swim what looks like a very unshowy breast or backstroke, in the fast lane. So many men with grunty warmups and nosclips and accessories think they can splashily crawl faster than me and choose to swim down the fucking middle of the lane to prove it. They can't. I lap them all, and it gives me huge satisfaction.

But I am totally cool with folks of a certain age doing bizarre fitness routines in the slow lane.

whattheseithakasmean · 05/01/2017 13:08

What about a lane for leaving a slick of perfume and makeup behind you, so I could avoid swimming through someone else's vile chemical pong?

bruffin · 05/01/2017 13:13

alittlemop happened to me as well. One session everytime i tried to pass this bloke which i could do easily breaststroking,he would change to a very splashy overarm, which wasnt very effective bevause most of his body was out of the water and my breastroke was still faster than him.

PurpleDaisies · 05/01/2017 13:15

Errr... that would be me ... except that the main issue is recurring ear infections and a predilection towards eczema on my face, exacerbated by chlorine.

I really wasn't talking about fast head up breast stroke. I meant social swimmers who talk to each other constantly and get in everyone's way. I don't understand why they don't just get in the jacuzzi. This might just be a problem in my pool.

GilMartin · 05/01/2017 13:15

Maybe the insecure swimming men can join the insecure cycling men who can't stand it when my wife drops them on a hill climb. It's truly pathetic to watch their anger and disbelief that a woman has the brass neck to be better at an aspect of cycling than them.

If there's insecure male runners out there, perhaps they could all do an insecure triathlon together.

PurpleDaisies · 05/01/2017 13:16

If there's insecure male runners out there, perhaps they could all do an insecure triathlon together.

Grin
YetAnotherSpartacus · 05/01/2017 13:22

What about a lane for leaving a slick of perfume and makeup behind you, so I could avoid swimming through someone else's vile chemical pong?

And aftershave ...

Seriously, am I the only one who showers before getting in?

I really wasn't talking about fast head up breast stroke. I meant social swimmers who talk to each other constantly and get in everyone's way. I don't understand why they don't just get in the jacuzzi. This might just be a problem in my pool.

I guess i am lucky because I don't usually have this problem, and if I do it is couples ... one of which needed a hotel room more than a jacuzzi.

bruffin · 05/01/2017 13:27

have you had the triangle swimmers?
in the lane swim for over 50s1 swimming upright backwards and 2 swimming head up breaststroke side by side so the could all chat. we had to have words with the life guards.

LogicallyLost · 05/01/2017 13:48

Well OP lesson learned about the "rules" of the lanes.

Please don't let this put you off, swimming was\is important for me losing the weight. The majority of people are fine (the faster swimmers usually the most polite about letting people pass, it's the ones with over inflated opinions of their capabilities that are a PITA).

I always thought that if people looked at me when i was larger, well at least i'm doing something about it.