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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To have been shamed at the gym

311 replies

Bonbon12 · 04/01/2017 20:42

I am a plus size lady who has made it her New Years resolution to lose weight. I joined a gym in December and mainly use the pool. I suffer from knee pain so I have to use the pool for my exercise I can't do running or bike.

So I do little bit of swim-hops/walking which helps my knee and also helps me lose weight. When I arrived I went into the fast lane as it was completely empty and was the smallest lane. It suddenly got really busy and that made other lanes quite busy.

Then two men moved into my lane. They started a fast swim. I asked them could they wait another 15 mins for me to finish and that I have a knee problem so this is helps me.

They replied that "that's not our problem and that the pool was for those who do real exercise". I replied it is real exercise and then I heard one of the men mutter "it's not the lard lane" and I left straight away.

Aibu to think that these men are complete cunts.

OP posts:
lljkk · 04/01/2017 22:28

I don't get it... my pool has a deep end so only guys > 6' tall can hop/walk more than 2/3 of it. Also, how long does it take to hop 25m (few pools are longer than that). Must be what.... 3 minutes at most to hop 25m in a super special way? Was OP hopping handstands, maybe?

Ohyesiam · 04/01/2017 22:28

And I STILL DON'T KNOW WHAT SWIM HOPPING IS.
designerjunky how were you going against the grain? That's what 90% of posters said.

MrsTerryPratchett · 04/01/2017 22:28

if there were only the 3 of you in the lane they could have overtaken you until you got the message clearly that fast means fast and slow means slow. They did and she allegedly asked them to stop!

PurpleDaisies · 04/01/2017 22:29

I don't get it... my pool has a deep end so only guys > 6' tall can hop/walk more than 2/3 of it

Pools in gyms are often the same depth all the way along. Mine is.

lljkk · 04/01/2017 22:30

Lousy for tumble turns, then. Which means lousy for club swimming.
Anyway, how does one need 15 minutes to hop 25m? That's less than 2metres per minute!!

HappyLittleCloud · 04/01/2017 22:31

Edwin has it spot on. I'm usually between medium and fast but I stay in the medium lane. I'd rather be one of the faster swimmers in a lane than holding anyone up.

fruitlovingmonkey · 04/01/2017 22:32

YABU, you aren't entitled to have your own private lane to pootle about in.

lljkk · 04/01/2017 22:32

Google says that Pool Hopping is breaking into outdoor pool areas & having fun, usually with a gang of mates. ok, I get it, that's why average pace is less than 2m per minute. Here's OP at her raving best.

To have been shamed at the gym
Foxysoxy01 · 04/01/2017 22:34

Where did you expect them to swim? or did you expect them to wait for 15 mins while you finished your walk?

Why do you trump their use of the pool?

They were very rude but you cannot seriously think it's ok to not swim fast in a fast swim lane Hmm

Start again afresh tomorrow and stay in the slow lane or non lane part of the pool Wink

HappyLittleCloud · 04/01/2017 22:34

Oh and if there are only 2 in a lane and it's wide enough, it's OK to suggest sharing the lane lengthways until a third person joins.

VeryBitchyRestingFace · 04/01/2017 22:35

You are worthwhile. You are someone to be proud of. The people who don't even get down to the gym are the less than worthwhile ones...

Is going to the gym the barometer for 'worthwhileness' now? Hmm

BTW, I used to pool hop naked in my not-so-misspent youth.

Them were the days...

Backt0Black · 04/01/2017 22:38

You are worthwhile. You are someone to be proud of. The people who don't even get down to the gym are the less than worthwhile ones...

FGS..... that's some judgey psychobabble right there....

Thecontentedcat · 04/01/2017 22:40

Op is a frog, hence the swim hopping business. It is my only conclusion.

HelenaGWells · 04/01/2017 22:41

They were very rude, but you were in the wrong. The fast lane is for fast swimmers. You shouldn't have been in there in the first place.

This. Don't let them put you off though.

RB68 · 04/01/2017 22:42

easy to say in hindsight but I think I would have said its not the arseholes lane either but I don't see it stopping you...

You were wrong to ask them to wait given you were in the fast lane area. You were not wrong to use it whilst free, but I would say as they were using it for the purpose it was intended you did need to clear out - but yes they were unnecessarily rude and obnoxious

melj1213 · 04/01/2017 22:42

It would have been one thing if you were in the middle of the lane and they had tried unsuccessfully to overtake you and you had said something like "Oh sorry, I have a knee injury so the lifeguard said I could use this lane while it was empty and I hadn't realised you were wanting. I can't get out at the side of the pool here, so would you mind waiting a while so I can get to the shallow end to get out by the steps and I'll be out of your way?" but expecting anyone to wait 15 minutes to do their workout because you are mis-using the facilities is very selfentitled behaviour.

Even if the lifeguard did say you could use it, I assume it was because the lane was currently lying empty whilst all the other lanes were in use and you wanted to be out of the traffic. I'm sure he expected you to use your common sense and understand that his permission was given with the proviso that you could use it until such time as someone actually wanted to use the lane for it's intened purpose.

Whilst none of that excuses the rude behaviour shown by the men wanting to use the fast lane, nor the name calling, I can understand their frustration. They wanted to come and use the fast lane for its intended purpose, and find some random woman walking up and down ... when they tried to get on with their fast swim, you stopped them to tell them to wait while you finished! If that was me, I'd have hoped I'd have done less name calling (especially as a larger lady myself) but I'd definitely have been making it clear that this was the fast lane, for fast swimmers, and therefore that took priority over any other use of the lane and you needed to get out of the way or I'd be asking the lifeguard to have a word.

HeirOfNothingInParticular · 04/01/2017 22:43

OP, they were very rude speaking to you like that, however as others have said YWBU to be in the fast lane. Edwinbear has summed up swimming etiquette very well. I am a very competent swimmer, but will usually pick the slow lane as I find swimmers to be ruthless ;) Don't let it put you off though

DistanceCall · 04/01/2017 22:45

Okay I can't go back in time and use a different lane it's done now

They were rude but you were wrong. Doesn't sound like this is the answer you wanted to get, though.

DeleteOrDecay · 04/01/2017 22:49

The people who don't even get down to the gym are the less than worthwhile ones...

Oh, well thanks for thatHmm

QueenMortificado · 04/01/2017 22:51

You are worthwhile. You are someone to be proud of. The people who don't even get down to the gym are the less than worthwhile ones...

On another gym thread today we had a comment about people going to the gym all-year round being "the hardcore elite".

I awarded that the wankiest thing I'd heard on mumsnet but I think that's now fallen in to second place

Designjunkie · 04/01/2017 22:57

By agreeing that she deserved to be verbally abused by the men in some way. Maybe not called lard but she definitely deserved being told off in some way.

Designjunkie · 04/01/2017 23:00

My last comment was to ohyesiam

PurpleDaisies · 04/01/2017 23:02

By agreeing that she deserved to be verbally abused by the men in some way. Maybe not called lard but she definitely deserved being told off in some way.

Being told off and being verbally abused are not the same thing at all.

RebelRogue · 04/01/2017 23:03

You are worthwhile. You are someone to be proud of. The people who don't even get down to the gym are the less than worthwhile ones...

I swim pretty well and i'm quite fast. However i rarely go and only for fun,not with any aim of losing weight or getting fit. I do lose weight on holidays though as i spend nearly the whole day in the pool.
Where exactly do I fit on your amazing scale of worthiness ,oh wise one?

VeryBitchyRestingFace · 04/01/2017 23:08

Everyone and their granny is gonna be quoting that spiel until this thread finally surrenders the ghost.

I do so love motivational claptrap. Great way to take the heat off OP. Grin