To be so annoyed with other drivers 'waving' me on

[TheresaVGreen]

I am quite happy to wait until a natural break in traffic to continue with my turning right manoeuvre thank you. I do not need you to come to a complete stop for me (which is dangerous and against the Highway Code), holding up everyone behind you, to then wave me on and get frustrated with me when I don't immediately take you up on your kind 'offer'.

I think I'm almost getting to the point where I am simply not going to move when I am waved on, and wait for the other driver to continue driving.

AIBU to be frustrated with drivers who take the rules into their own hands like this?

Okay so now you're saying that you're not putting yourself in danger, it's just an annoyance.

Usually someone pulling up and offering is being kind.

They are being unreasonable if they are being impatient about a hazard that you are aware of and they are not.

I wave rather than flashing lights as flashing lights is ambiguous. It is commonly used as an invitation or thanks, but could be its proper use as the warming of a hazard, and not safe to go. I'm not being hesitant when I am checking for myself that the way is clear.

When I was learning, I was told that if visibility is poor, then you should "peep and creep" until you can continue safely. If there is a hazard that is hard to see, then it gives more reaction time to you and oncoming traffic, rather than blindly shooting out and hoping for the best. Occasionally I will peep and creep at a busy junction where you can otherwise wait until bedtime for a suitable gap in the traffic. Better than darting out and forcing an oncoming driver to brake sharply.

It feels a bit like the other driver is just rolling to test out who will stop for them

That's exactly what they're doing.

90% of people on the road are extreeeeme;y impatient.

people are sometimes so weird, we have two lanes that merge in to one on a local dual carriageway, its merge in turn, so every other car should be able to join and it's expected that the lane that's merged into can cope with this and slow down in turn. The amount of drivers who won't let others in while staring rigidly ahead is unbelievable.

It's some sort of let down in their personality that they can't bear to be seen as giving in.

No, I will roll out if I have been waiting for ten minutes or so and traffic is travelling at a few miles an hour. In my opinion it's rude to not let people out (and I think the Highway Code supports that).

Newsflash: other drivers can do something annoying.
I just assume they are having a worse day than me and let them get on with it. Or if I'm having a shit day, a minor traffic annoyance doesn't really make it worse.
If I'm stuck in a jam, I'm glad I'm not the reason for the jam. Put the radio on; look at bits of the scenery I don't usually see. Not much I can do about it. Swear a bit if dd isn't in the car but just to release some tension. Get into jam mode.
There's enough reason to be pissed off at the world.

The amount of drivers who won't let others in while staring rigidly ahead is unbelievable
Or, as I had last year (maybe longer), the dickhead driver who, well before the merge point, drove straddling the central line of the two lanes to prevent those "naughty" drivers on the right unfairly grabbing a place further up the following queue than they should "rightly" be.

It is no concern of mine if others choose to move left so early that the right lane is clear. I merge at the point that the road tells me to. This is not wrong.

I am fed up wth people who want to drive at 20mph in a 30mph. Yet as soon as the road opens up for people to overtake, they stick their foot down to twice the speed limit to ensure they are still ahead

A lot of control creaks on the roads

And complete pricks who , in a que of slow moving traffic, will insist on sitting half a mile behind the car in front. trundling along at 5mph so they can feel they are more in control. Yet all this does is create more congestion.

Despite what the highway code says, you cannot drive on the assumption the person in front may slam on the brakes for something to do. There is simply not enough room on the roads.
But you really need to do this, it's a fundamental driving skill, if you feel you can't, don't drive, seriously. If you can't react to a car stopping suddenly, you won't be able to stop for a child running out either :-(.

OR people who are trundling along at 15mph, but when they see someone ahead about to pull out of a driveway or side street, they put their foot down to 50mph and get right up your jacksy

Or people who are driving alone at 15mph and leaving a half mile gap in between them and the car in front, UNTIL you move into the huge space and suddenly they need to speed up to 50mph to close the gap and get right up your arse

Basically people who are control freaks and use their cars to intimidate people . Those that don't want to go fast UNTIL they see someone else about to overtake or get in front, and then suddenly they are in a rush

I am an annoying person who leaves a big gap from the car in front as I don't want to be shunted in one of the many low speed pile ups. There is always a dick who thinks that they should put their car in the gap though. Always the same brand of car too.

I am going out in a minute in the car, I shall let out as many people as I can today

You have to drive on the assumption that the car in front will slam on the brakes. It's called an emergency stop. It may be for a stupid reason or a life saving reason. Either way. You have to find away to be ready for it and still drive safely.

Doughnuts- think of the Karma points you'll earn!

And I've just remembered (because I've just driven past it):

I live near an incredibly busy single lane road which reaches a crossroads with a minor road, all directions controlled by traffic lights. Obviously, the traffic lights are green for the main road a whole lot longer than for the minor road. This is fine because traffic is very light off the minor road and for every one car that needs to turn out of there, there is half a mile of traffic needing to go through on the main road.

Occasionally, someone needs to turn right from the main road onto the minor road. There is no room in either direction to manoeuvre around the right turner - the main road traffic simply stops behind them. I am not exaggerating when I say that while they wait to turn right, because there's no chance they can skip across, the traffic can back up horrendously, even reaching across a motorway junction in one direction.

There are no filters for right turners. Just before Christmas, I noticed the appearance of some signs, not official Highways Agency stuff but properly printed nevertheless (maybe a local resident has got a really good printer), with instructions that if a vehicle is waiting at the lights to turn right from the main road to the minor, please, for the love of God, stop and let them cross your lane.

OP combusts

The driver on the sliproad should speed match and thus be able to pull onto the motorway safely and efficiently. They are not going to pull out regardless of whether you are there or not.

This.

People pull out from the motorway slip road without regard to the prevailing traffic conditions because they are knobs. And you have to anticipate knobbish behaviour like this as you approach a joining slip Road usually by moving lanes well in advance. And keeping an eye on how knobbish they are as you pass.

Provided it is a single carriageway and the person is wanting to turn left - i.e. join my lane in front of me I often stop and let them in. In these circumstances the traffic is usually moving quite slowly anyway. If anyone lets me in I smile and wave in gratitude and I usually get the same response if I'm letting someone out. In London you just have to grit your teeth and pull out!

And you have to anticipate knobbish behaviour like this as you approach a joining slip Road usually by moving lanes well in advance
Yes, I'm in the middle lane well before the sliproad.

YABU.

It's nobbish to not let someone on to a slip road when you can do
Depends what you mean by "when you can do". And I assume you mean "off a sliproad onto a dual carriageway/motorway"?

When joining a motorway, the onus is 100% on the joiner to join safely. That is because it is very dangerous for traffic on the motorway to have to organise themselves around the joiner.

Despite generally advocating a "let people in if you can" approach here, I consider a motorway the one time you do not normally consider slowing down, either naturally or worse, by applying your brakes, to let someone join. They must speed up or slow down to match the speed of the carriageway, then they can pull on without anyone needing to do anything.

I do not want you to do anything unexpected to make it easier for me, because I consider by doing so, you are making things more dangerous for yourself. I am perfectly capable of getting onto a motorway with no input from others, even if people haven't moved across in advance.

If there is conflict, I, on the sliproad, will brake. It is safer for me to brake than for you to brake. If one of us is going to get rear-ended, it should be me. It is the best outcome in an impossible situation.

Usual disclaimer that motorways don't always operate perfectly and sometimes sliproads are very short, are more like merges than sliproads etc. And always an idiot who doesn't check the carriageway until the last minute and has to emergency stop at the end of a sliproad blah blah. I'm taking in ideals here.

Actually, I'm not sure that temproarily slowing naturally by lightening your right foot - perhaps in anticipation of a potential hazard - is a massive problem. I probably do that to some extent (if I haven't already moved over). It's braking (and telling cars behind you that you are braking) that I have an issue with.

I think you ABVU.

I get the whole "it's dangerous" thing but so is any manoeuvre on the road.

I have never been in a situation where I have thought "has he waved me to go or has he not, what shall I do, aargh I'll risk it, aah damn he's hit me" because when I'm driving, as well as scouring the surroundings for hazard I'm also looking straight at each oncoming driver in the face waiting for a signal. If I see it, I go, I don't hang around long enough for the "did he/did he not" scenario to happen.

Similarly if I'm letting somebody through but I can see they are not looking at me because they're looking at the street they're turning in to for example, I would either continue to drive or I would make sure they are looking straight at me before I do my signal so that there's no confusion.

I completely think it's down to confidence and alertness. There are too many drivers who would rather just mull along and not be "switched on" to the other drivers around them. It's a lazy and inefficient way of driving.