To think that now I'm doing his washing

[cinnamonswirler]

And staying over six nights a week, I may actually have moved in?

TBH if I've ever washed my clothes at someone else's house I've not combined it with theirs. I'm not responsible for other people's clothes.

i think the response OP was looking for was:

AWWW hun congrats, i hear wedding bells lol xx

It's not my choice! I stayed in the family home and he moved in around the corner.

Bow - I'm not 23, nor horrendously immature

One - more than you can shake a stick at. Which is why I question what unhealthy dynamics?

Well what response were you hoping for?

These sensible ones

OP you're allowing your abusive ex to impact the dynamic of this new relationship. It's prompting you to spend more time at this man's place than you otherwise might. You're very much living under your ex's shadow.

Which is why I question what unhealthy dynamics?

As I already said, any.

Can you explain why, at 23, with generations of feminism behind you, you are cooking and cleaning for a man you don't even live with?

I thought you were maybe 60 and a brainwashed housewife.

This is very confusing. Do your children live with the abusive ex 6 days a week?

Gloria - hysterical!!! Best laugh I've had in ages. I really needed that

My mistake, I misread your post. Strike the 23 but the rest stands.

Weird thread.

I think:

1. The OP's having a laugh with her elliptical, not to say gnomic posts.
2. She should seriously consider changing her name to Axminster.

Don't see what you were aiming for here. You started with what comes across as a moan, then backtracked and said it's all fine and here's some justifying stuff about my ex I didn't mention earlier. But since you've said you can't move in with your partner because your DS wants to stay put (and, presumably, because then your ex would work it out) then what are you saying? Or is this a Thorn Birds style 'how sad we can't be properly together' thing?

Op - in the 4 years the now DH and I were dating but had our own homes, I never once did his washing at his house. We have been married for a decade and he still does his own ironing.

He's right, you don't live there, stop acting like his housework is your job to do, and if you do move in, don't decide you'll just take over the cleaning and washing because you are female.

It always astounds me how many woman complain that if they have to do all the housework while failing to acknowledge they basically volunteered in the first place.

It's not funny OP, it's actually really depressing.

cinnamon your way of posting makes you come accross a bit disjointed. Like you have one half of your post in your head and the rest on here and are getting antsy because we are not mind readers.

From what I can gather he doesn't want you living in his house it wants you to be there on tap, waiting for him to summon you over.

So, you don't want to live together, but because you posted the AIBU I guess you're feeling unhappy in some way about not living together? Maybe you should talk to him about this.

I was wondering why you were staying with him 6 nights a week but I think it's clear that's how long it takes you to get a coherent sentence out before he can respond and send you off back home.

Hang on..you're doing his washing, cleaning, cooking and ironing and he hasn't officially asked you to move in?

Wondering where the kids are those 6 nights a week.

Where are the children six nights a week?

OP, are you on glue? This thread is insane! Wtf are you on about?