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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think there is no way my baby will ever manage a Gina Ford routine?

313 replies

Aliveinwanderland · 30/12/2016 20:38

Someone recommended the Gina Ford book to me. Read it through and just laughed! There is no chance my 9 week old DS would manage that routine!

I am wanting to get him a little more structure after Christmas but according to Gina Ford he should be sleeping through from 10:30-7am by now. DS goes no longer than 3 hours between feeds and only feeds for 5-10 mins at a time. Gina says I should be doing 20 minutes on one breast and then 10 minutes on another- how on earth is someone suppose to force a baby take this much?

Gina Ford has gone back on the bookshelf never to be read again. But if anyone has any sensible advice about how to promote longer sleeping at night, or a good day time routine then please share!

OP posts:
Original poster
Aliveinwanderland · 30/12/2016 21:21

Marmalade- he feeds every 3 hours, day and night. Sometimes in the day it can be every 2. Sometimes he wants more an hour after a feed.

OP posts:
mummydawn07 · 30/12/2016 21:22

I personally think it's all down to the baby/child, my firls dd woke up 3-4 times every night for a breast feed, my 2nd dd had a long feed (breast) fell asleep and went all night without waking up, as long as you have routine in feeding times and bedtime that's a good start. I have never even heard of Gina Ford feel like I've been living under a rock as it's popped up a few times on MN but I am fairly new to MN lol

GreenAndWinter · 30/12/2016 21:22

Ab1000 I'm sorry, I knew as soon as I hit post that I should have stayed out of this. We are all so defensive about our feeding choices, and it's so hard to know what to do at the time. It sounds like you had a real struggle, and that you got through it just fine in the end.

Of course it's true that you didn't mention babies sleeping through the night better on formula. I was just thinking about what other people reading this thread might conclude.

I'm glad your baby didn't have any allergies. My eldest was given formula just once in hospital, and has incredibly severe multiple food allergies, enough to be described as a disability. My second child was completely breastfed and has no allergies at all. This is something I have to be very careful about disclosing when I am working as a breastfeeding supporter. There's no actual evidence that it was the formula that caused the allergies, he could have just been unlucky. Anyway, this is irrelevant to the Gina Ford theme of the thread.

I honestly didn't mean to criticise you, and I hope you're not feeling criticised Flowers

BusyBeez99 · 30/12/2016 21:24

I looked at this book in desperation when my baby was waking up. Then I put it in the bin. Luckily my FF baby was on routine feeds quite early on but he still had a 2am feed until he was 5 months old so definitely not sleeping through! In fact until he was about 2.5 he was doing 10pm to 4am still.

Now aged 11 he does 8pm to 6am so always an early riser, still is.

HarryPottersMagicWand · 30/12/2016 21:28

I like GFs potty training book, followed it exactly both times with great success.

Mine didn't sleep through at 9 weeks, they were 13 and 11 weeks but they were both FF. BF babies just aren't going to sleep through at a young age. We had a bedtime routine, wash etc down for 7, nighttimes were kept 'unfun', low light, no interacting as such, fed the 'midwife' way (which you obviously can't do if you are BF and straight down again. I actually don't know anyone else who's babies slept through as early as mine, I was very lucky but I do also put part of it down to how we did it.

Don't stress OP, it will happen when it does. Make sure you do a bedtime routine, put them down at regular times, and make sure they are awake, don't rock to sleep etc.

Ab1000 · 30/12/2016 21:29

Greenandwinter. No not feeling criticised. This is going away from the op but all these years later I still feel that the health visitors and midwives who solely promoted breast feeding exacerbated my pmd. The hv left me crying on the doorstep with a new born who wouldn't feed and was losing weight. Gf did help me immensely.

OohNoDooEy · 30/12/2016 21:29

Well... it does work if you follow it to the letter. You will have a happy baby once they're following it but you have to accept a couple of weeks of unhappiness to get there! I do think that there's a current fashion of being baby led to the extreme but a baby doesn't necessarily know what's best for them.

Ragwort · 30/12/2016 21:29

I followed GF (yes, 15 years ago Grin) and I breast fed - it worked for us but maybe I was just lucky in that I had a baby that was happy to self settle and sleep from 7am - 7pm - it might have been GF - it might not Confused.

amispartacus · 30/12/2016 21:30

I thought Gina was SWMNBN on here...

I wonder if some of these posts will be deleted..

Lugeeta · 30/12/2016 21:30

Gins Ford is bonkers imo. For ff babies with a nanny it may work?!

But to get bf babies to sleep for longer I think feeding often in the day and cluster feeding before bed helps them to get a 6h stretch by 3-4weeks.

Chinashoes · 30/12/2016 21:30

Hello OP and congrats on your baby.

In terms of getting more of a daytime routine in place what Gymnopedies says was spot on for me when my son was tiny. Try to identify how long your baby is able to stay awake for and plan your time around that. There is quite a useful book called Your Baby Week by Week by Dr Caroline Fertleman (or something similar!) which as I remember gave some indication of what you could expect for napping times, waking times etc without advocating any particular approach too heavily.

Once I'd worked that out, for me the key thing was to get dressed (and sometimes even showered) as soon as my baby was up and fed in the morning, when he was still feeling happy and was able to spend ten minutes or so in the bouncer chair (the vibrating bouncer chair I should admit!). That way we could get out before he started approaching tiredness, when he would really want to be held close and it was impossible to get anything done.

For night time, as others have said it is very normal for a 9 week old to wake at night and the only thing I'd advise at this stage is to keep the room in total darkness when your baby wakes. Obviously feed and hold close as they require but don't communicate verbally or stimulate them in any other way at night. I personally found that ensuring my son and me got plenty of fresh air in the day time also helped, as did doing stuff with him (reading, baby bounce etc) to tire him out. Later on you can look at sleep associations and training but I don't think any of that would be appropriate or even helpful now. When you do, the Millpond Institute's Teach your baby to sleep is the best book out there. I really wish I'd read it when my son was four months old!

Good luck and pay no attention to what GF says should be happening. Obvs her approach has worked for some babies and parents but it definitely shouldn't be used as a stick to measure yourself against. If you are feeling ok in yourself, your baby is happily feeding and gaining weight and you occasionally wash/ leave the house then you are doing just great. All the best with the routine and everything else

Ragwort · 30/12/2016 21:31

Ooh - I disagree that you have to accept a couple of weeks of unhappiness to get there - my DS was in the GF routine from the night we returned from hospital - no unhappiness from him or me Smile.

GimmeeMoore · 30/12/2016 21:32

Gina ford threads invariably get deleted

TheGrumpySquirrel · 30/12/2016 21:33

Scarface that's hilarious! "You're such a GF"

GreenAndWinter · 30/12/2016 21:37

Ab1000 thank you for not taking what I said the wrong way Flowers Yes, at the risk of going off-topic, it's sad that you had that experience with your HVs and midwives. I wish I could say it didn't happen any more, but it does. Generally speaking, they have better training these days, but we still meet mums who have been told they must breastfeed at all costs, but have been given no real help with the practicalities. The most common problems are just positioning and attachment, which could easily have been solved in hospital by a competent midwife, but sometimes I have seen mums crying with sore and bleeding nipples, yet still desperate to breastfeed. I try not to show it, but it makes me so cross! Also, there are mums nearly crying with sleep-deprivation, who have not been given practical advice.

Well done for doing whatever you had to do to get through. I'm glad it all worked out so well for you. Smile

Ab1000 · 30/12/2016 21:39

Greenandwinter- Thanks

clumsyduck · 30/12/2016 21:41

Luckily I didn't read any bollocks books

Fed when hungry like I assumed babies were meant to which gradually got bigger intervals in between untill sleeping through

I'm not being smug I was young and didn't even know that these routines
And plans were a thing . I do now and should I have more still wouldn't do any different

Enjoy your baby op

Chelazla · 30/12/2016 21:41

GF is deranged! My husband read about 4 pages and binned the book! I was very lucky with my two as my dd slept through from about 6 weeks and my very greedy ds from 4 weeks so had no need for any of her wisdom! They were both ff. Running the risk of much abuse I never wanted to bf ever. They are both happy and hardly ever poorly. Again running the risk of much abuse I think it's a much easier option. I admire ppl who bf as there's no way I could have done it!

TrollTheRespawnJeremy · 30/12/2016 21:42

eats popcorn

I totally agree but this never goes well as Gina Ford censors everything.....

Lelloteddy · 30/12/2016 21:43

Jeez MNHQ must be asleep tonight. The klaxons should have gone off by now and the lawyers must be sweating.

IamnotaStepfordHousewife · 30/12/2016 21:44

Don't is all I have to say! Got obsessed in my PND state until dh took the book away from me. Seriously take that book with a very large pinch of salt!!!

MrsTerryPratchett · 30/12/2016 21:47

GF works if you have a baby and a life that it works with. Not a hope in hell with DD.

It's like homeopathy. If it works, you think it was the sugar pills, even though it was just the placebo effect. You tell everyone it works and to try it. If it doesn't, it was you, or something you did, or you're doing it wrong.

Very clever ways both to make money from desperate people.

amispartacus · 30/12/2016 21:48

I give this thread 30 minutes....

MadgeMak · 30/12/2016 21:50

Some babies are very efficient feeders, marmalade. Both of mine never fed for more than twenty minutes, and often much less than that.

JustDanceAddict · 30/12/2016 21:50

That's cos GF is a load of cock