Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6

Original poster

I've lost my mum

143 replies

Disinterested · 30/12/2016 19:13

My beautiful mum died yesterday. Totally unexpected. I am lost. I am 25 and have a partner of 7 years, he lost his dad when he was 18 but i dont think he understands how awful i feel. I cqnt imagine life without her and each breath i take is painful. Sorry if this is incoherent but my heart is broken. Please tell me it gets better.

OP posts:

LazySusan11 · 30/12/2016 23:23

I'm so sorry for your loss Disinterested, I hope you have good support around you and I wish you strength in the coming days. Huge hugs

tallulahbalghar · 30/12/2016 23:30

I am so sorry for your loss. My mum died when I was sixteen and all I can say is that you will get through this because you learn to live without them but don't be ashamed to grieve. She was your Mum xxx

pointythings · 30/12/2016 23:37

I am so sorry. It must be so much harder when you are young. Please be kind to yourself. Bereavement is a long process, but may I recommend that if you feel overwhelmed, you contact CRUSE? You can find them on the Internet. They are a charity who offer bereavement counselling and they are excellent. All the counsellors have suffered bereavement themselves, have been trained and know what they are doing. It's free - you can choose to make a donation afterwards or not. They have helped my DH overcome the loss of his parents. I can't praise them highly enough.

JuanPotatoTwo · 30/12/2016 23:40

I'm so sorry for your loss Disinterested, what a horrible horrible shock for you. I lost my Dad nearly two years ago - I'm much older than you, and he was ill, but it was still awful. I miss him dreadfully but in a strange sort of way I feel that's a good thing, and a testament to the sort of person he was.

The one thing I would say to you to be aware of right now is not to make any big decisions - the day after my Dad died I cleared out some of his old books and papers, and I so wish now that I hadn't. I actually don't even remember doing it. So be kind to yourself, and take the time to think and consider and reflect and grieve and cry and talk and shout and laugh - but perhaps don't do anything practical just yet.

My thoughts are with you.

Mammylamb · 30/12/2016 23:41

So sorry for your loss.

AdoraBell · 30/12/2016 23:44

Sorry for your loss

pieceofpurplesky · 30/12/2016 23:54

So sorry to hear about your mum. She sounds like she was a fabulous mum x

YorkshireLass2012 · 31/12/2016 00:26

Sorry for your loss OP 🌺

I lost my wonderful Mum when I was 20. I think of her every day. Coping with the grief does get better. Take your time and grieve however feels right for you and for however long. I went shopping and baked and baked and baked which some found strange. I just needed to focus on something other than my pain.

Sending you many hugs

DramaAlpaca · 31/12/2016 00:30

So sorry OP

Brownhairbrowneyes · 31/12/2016 00:45

I'm so so sorry to hear this. I lost my mum at 27,5 years later I still struggle a lot but day to day living does get easer. Just hang on in there & make sure your around people who love you

38cody · 31/12/2016 00:52

I'm so sorry that you've lost your lovely mum - how lucky you were to have such a lovely relationship and knowing that she knew she was loved. Tell us more about your mum if it helps at all - what was she like?

foxyloxy78 · 31/12/2016 01:19

Sorry for your loss OP. . Take it a day at a time and spend time with friends and family as they will support you through this. Hugs x

LucyBabs · 31/12/2016 01:28

I'm so sorry to hear you have lost you DM dis
I can't agree with others that it gets easier, personally it has got harder for me and my siblings.
Each year without my dm is torture. I won't thankfully ever feel the grief of the first few months without her again but she's still not here. I miss her, my dc miss her. Life won't ever be the same without her..
Look after yourself as best you can, take all offers of help and don't shut yourself away

Itsallgoodimtold · 31/12/2016 01:36

I really feel for you, whether that brings any comfort or not. I can only imagine your pain. Please give yourself time to really 'feel' ; sadness, anger, annoyance, regret (please don't dwell on regret, just acknowledge).

RubyPumps · 31/12/2016 20:53

Just thinking of you OP and hope you're hanging in there

RubyPumps · 31/12/2016 20:55

I promise you that this time next year thing will feel slightly less painful. I hope that you're OK.

itfcbabe · 31/12/2016 22:33

I am so sorry to hear this,I lost my mum when I was 23 and my dad when I was 20(I'm now 40), it does get better with time but cry,grieve,shout whatever makes you feel better.

It will get easier in time,.xxx

AmIBeingUnseasonal · 31/12/2016 22:53

I lost my mum at 21, and found I was pregnant 2 days later which wasn't amazing timing, I'm 28 now and sometimes I still wish I could nip round and tell her things and ask for her advice. The pain doesn't go as such but instead you do become stronger and able to bear it better.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6

Swipe left for the next trending thread