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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Friends for dinner - AIBU?

116 replies

Toast3 · 30/12/2016 14:08

We had 3 couples over for dinner last night. All local people who were pretty friendly with and see regularly. We all seem to be doing different things on NYE so decided to get together for dinner last night. I said we'd host as we have the space etc... (large conservatory that doubles as a great dining space).

We all agreed to chip in and do a course each. I did the main course, one couple said they'd do the starters, another offered pud and the other ones offered cheese. We've done this, 'shared style' before and it usually works well..

The first couple arrived with the starters, all plated up and ready to serve.
Next couple arrived with a huge cheese board, grapes etc and a bottle of port to go with it.
Third coupe arrive with all the ingredients to make 2 desserts (trifle and a cheesecake.) They wanted to make it in my kitchen which was all nice n clean and ready for guests, candles lit, nibbles out etc etc..

I was really pissed off as it was very last minute and they bloody trashed the place. Cream & dishes all over the place. Did I have a blender etc etc...

I didn't say anything at the time but we were all a bit shocked but I didn't want to ruin the night so let it go.

They've hosted these types of nights before and it's not the normal to prep in the hosts home.. so it's not like they misunderstood...

I asked if they'd had a busy day and the wife of the couple says, no not really we've just been chilling out and watching tele with the kids...

Just thought it was cheeky - AIBU of am I just being a grumpy cow after an absolutely knackering Christmas.. not much chilling in front of the tele been going on here lol !

OP posts:

SooBee61 · 31/12/2016 20:46

I'm constantly being asked to bring 'my' trifle. It's really popular! It's nothing fancy just sponge, naice homemade custard, cream and fresh fruit.
Well I'd certainly eat that! Hint: use jam swiss roll as then you have sponge and jam combined with no effort.

SooBee61 · 31/12/2016 20:48

Shop bought ones always have jelly.
That may be because it's the cheapest ingredient.

bumsexatthebingo · 31/12/2016 21:07

Yanbu. If you're comfortable enough in someones home to be preparing a couple of desserts in their kitchen then you should be comfortable enough to run a sink of soapy water and clean up after yourself! Or even better just prep at home so everyone isn't waiting hungry while you fanny about!
Next time get them to host and offer to do the starter. Turn up with a massive bag of veg that needs peeling and do a soup.

debsadoos123 · 31/12/2016 21:19

wouldn't be an issue for me...I'd have joked about the mess and ensured they cleaned it up. on saying that as long as my guests were comfortable and had a good evening id probably let it go...life is too short

bunnylove99 · 31/12/2016 21:53

I'd let it go and politely suggest they bring ready prepared next time. I guess you should be happy you have friends nearby to celebrate with, and that they feel comfortable enough in your company to come and cook in your kitchen!

FilledSoda · 01/01/2017 12:16

They came back for the Baileys ?
Who does that ?

Cassns1 · 01/01/2017 12:40

yabnu. Would hate having people in my kitchen making dessert, while trying to host an evening (I probably wouldn't host an evening). On a side note, I love trifle too. I put jelly in it too...and sherry 😊

trixymalixy · 01/01/2017 12:50

Wouldn't have been a massive issue for me either, bit baffled that folk are saying they'd be furious. Maybe they just ran out of time to do it at home.

tabulahrasa · 01/01/2017 13:01

You get trifle without jelly?

I only tolerate the jelly for the rest of the trifleyness, why has no-one told me this before?

stiffstink · 01/01/2017 16:40

Trifle without jelly would just be cake, fruit and custard?! It wouldn't do that 'slurp' noise?

Bettercallsaul1 · 01/01/2017 19:35

And cream, stiffsink, don't forget the cream! Whipped cream and custard are quite "slurpy" too.

Clarabellb · 01/01/2017 20:56

The most shocking part is that they came back for the remains of the baileys

TowerRavenSeven · 01/01/2017 21:07

Yanbu. Next time tell them everything has to be brought made or just buy and bring. I had a boss whose wife told all her guests that before the holidays.

bloodymaria · 01/01/2017 21:13

Haven't rtft but jelly has no place in a trifle.

JulesJules · 02/01/2017 14:44

Lol at trifle being considered upper class

I really want trifle now

ppeatfruit · 03/01/2017 14:52

I think that trifle can be whatever you want it to be. I don't like jelly in it, because I like those little almond biscuits soaked in sherry and fresh raspberries\juice overnight. Then a thick layer of good custard and whipped double cream , and decorate with grated dark chocolate\flaked almonds. YUM.

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