...or is this slightly odd behaviour with regard to leftovers?

[naranciata]

At FIL's house. Yesterday I singlehandedly cooked a 3 course Christmas dinner for 11 people then went to bed about 9:30 because 25w pregnant and knackered. Woke up this morning and opened the fridge and you would not know it was Christmas yesterday. Every single leftover item has been portioned up and frozen and added to the "freezer spreadsheet" pinned to the noticeboard in the kitchen.

I was thinking along the lines of bubbles and squeak with fried eggs and cold meat for lunch, turkey sandwiches for snacks, big pan of veg soup for the next few days' food. Basically - no 'proper' cooking but lots of nice food.

I asked FIL if he'd frozen everything (as opposed to putting in garage fridge etc) and he thanked me for cooking and said he'd barely have to cook for himself over the next few days because of everything he was left with. In the same breath, he asked if I wanted some mince defrosting to make a chilli tonight.

AIBU to feel like it's not really up to him to freeze all the Christmas leftovers to be eaten when we've all left? Him and I paid for the food 50:50.

The point of Xmas leftovers are so no one has to cook on Boxing day. If he is old and on his own I would let it go but otherwise tell him you are pregnant and so tire more easily and so will be defrosting some leftovers for lunch.

Why the heck are you single handedly cooking a three course meal for 11 people in SOMEONE ELSE'S HOUSE WHILE 25 WEEKS PREGNANT!!!! And then he's expecting you to do the chilli too?

You should have refused to do it, Jesus Christ, that's just not on.

Let him freeze his leftovers, then just go home, put your feet up and tell the world to sod off while hoping your husband doesn't turn out like his father!

Ok, so I don't actually know the finer points of your family and being pregnant is not an illness (it's actually a blessing which not everyone can achieve) but come on, doing everything for 11 is a bit of a kick in the teeth.

If I'm not mistaken, it sounds like you FIL is on his own. Unless you are expected to cook again or pay for more food, I would let this pass. It sounds like having the food will help him out a bit and there are more important things to worry about. I have very strange in laws (oh I could tell you some stories) and sometimes unless they really really bother you, you just have to let things pass. Good luck with the baby.

You don't have to let anything pass. So what if he's on his own? Lots are, and she says he's perfectly capable of cooking. It's just easier to expect the little wifey to do it and stock the freezer. And pay for half of it, too. That's some cheek.

It doesn't seem fair. We never have enough leftovers for such things. Do you cook way more than you need? If I'm lucky I get a chicken carcass to make stock from or some tomatoes sauce to eat with pasta later.

I'd say leftovers from the Xmas day dinner are an integral part of Xmas eating, and that everybody knows that. I've never known anyone so rude as to expect to keep everything - I'd expect visitors to be able to ask what goodies we had left and to tuck in. You shared the costs and did all the work - eat what you want, and maybe next year buy, eat and enjoy leftovers in your own home - or don't do the cooking (unless there's a good reason why you do!) Good luck with the baby and I hope you get to enjoy some nice leftovers and picky bits elsewhere if not there - and get a well-deserved rest :)

Well done, OP, for getting the leftovers out and eating what you want! It's nice to read a "cheeky fecker taking the piss" thread on here that has a happy ending.

One of the reasons I have resisted going out to a restaurant for Christmas dinner is the resultant lack of leftovers for Boxing Day and the rest of the week

It is part of the fun & makes for easy catering after the main event.

We're still eating up pork pie, ham & cold beef

Glad you stood your ground op. Your fil is an arse. I'd seriously consider staying home next year, you'll have a six month old so that's a great excuse.
I'd have taken the leftovers home too, even if they'd defrosted on the way. I'd have rather thrown them away than left them for him. I hate stingyness.

At first I thought he was portioning and freezing them for you because you'd worked so hard and were pregnant. Then realized it wasn't for you, not even half of them...he expected to keep EVERYTHING for himself, LOL! You were definitely NBU & I'm glad you stood up for yourself & took some!

And then cook for everyone. More food for him to keep the lot of even though he charged you for half.

Good on you for standing up for yourself and I hope your DH is supportive.
I feel for the awkwardness of the other guests though...
You've just reminded me of the turkey sandwich I'd planned to eat-so thanks, it was lovely!

YANBU

I'd divorce your husband for fear that he turns in to his father!! Grab them leftovers and never darken his doorstep again!!! What a fucking liberty!!! 😂

YAdefNBU!

Leftovers are my favourite part of Christmas. I would harm anyone who came between me and my Boxing Day breakfast (yep, I took a photo, I loved it so much )

Now I fancy chilli,

SomeKindOfNightmare, AIBU to want to hear a lot more stories about your ham-burglars?!

Yes it is slightly odd behaviour. He was obviously chancing his arm! Glad you have regained your half of the leftovers.
By the way, we don't do leftovers here either. There are no leftovers ever. well there are leftovers on individual plates sometimes but nobody wants to save those once they are all gravied up 😦

Is he on his own usually? I would feel a bit bad depriving him of some leftovers he'd gone to the trouble of portioning out. Life's too short!

I wouldn't have been arsed about the frozen leftovers, I'd have accepted the chilli he cooked though because I wouldn't be doing it.

I've read quite a few replies to this thread...all taking the side of O.P , including one saying that they'd take 50% of the food home eve if it ended up being binned that's pretty spiteful.... yeah your FIL paid 50% and then froze the rest but perhaps he thought there's no way you're getting it all home fresh? Perhaps there's a perfectly innocent explaination other than trying to hoard your 50% of the food OP?
Good of you to cook for everyone but I doubt that happened by accident? At some point you must have volunteered to do it?
If it was me i just leave him with the bloody food instead of feeling short changed about percentages and maybe next year when you've had your baby it can be your turn to put the shoe on the other foot , get your FIL round to do Xmas dinner and you freeze the left overs.
It's supposed to be the season of good will FFS , I can't imagine splitting hairs over who got the Xmas leftovers.... sorry OP , and I seem to be alone in my opinion , but I think it's a bit petty .

I would have left him his little cling-filmed selection of leftovers, to be honest. If I didn't need them and could afford to buy groceries for myself then it would have been a nice thing to do.

It might be OP's right to take them as she paid 50:50, but that doesn't make it right.

For someone who keeps a spreadsheet and monitors energy usage and variance, this isn't a little thing. I feel that OP has just jumped on the 'I'm HAVING half whatever' wagon without thinking much about it. If I were her husband - I wouldn't have left her to cook alone but then again, we wouldn't be unpacking frozen leftovers either. Bad form.

You aren't alone, AlexRose and I agree with every word of your post. I wonder who some of these posters are and whether they would really be so obdurate and cringworthy in real life.

Yes I was a lone voice earlier on in the thread

I'd honestly not have cared less about all this

OP - you were right to speak out! Glad to hear DH helped with prep and washing up, who are all the other incompetents?!!
Sandwich sounds lovely! Might just go and forage in DD's fridge to make similar ...
I think older people who live alone gradually become more self-centred so maybe FiL needed a reality check.