To think this is unbelievably tight for a wedding?

[StingyWedding]

Recently attending a wedding of a friend. Amongst various other issues on the day I just felt it was a very poor and stingy wedding, at the reception they had a "hot chocolate bar" - they were charging for this (and tea, and coffee....)

Photo attached which they have proudly displayed on their Facebook.

Am I wrong to think of you invite people to a wedding you actually host and therefore provide for your guests? Not expecting a free bar but some table wine and soft drinks surely?

What a sneery thread. You do realise that you're not obliged to either go to the wedding or buy the hot chocolate?

Fuck me you would have hated my wedding. I didn't even provide a sit down meal... we had a late afternoon registry office wedding followed by a massive, delicious hot and cold buffet and a dance. We had some bottles of Asti and some of shloer to do toasts with but everything else drink wise was paid yourself bar.

I imagine it's a company they hired who probably come for a nominal fee then charge either hosts or customers. They probably think it's a great idea as a warm alternative to soft drinks since it's December. It wouldn't bother me at all.

I've been to great weddings in village halls where you bring some food for the buffet, and drinks. Fine.

I've never been to a wedding with a paid bar. Weddings should provide a basic amount of free refreshments, something on arrival, something with the meal. Buying alcohol at a bar is expensive, partly due to tax. Tea and coffee cost a few pence.

Dressing tea/ coffee/ hot chocolate up as a feature and charging an extortionate rate for them is poor hosting and presented very differently to just buying them at the bar in the usual manner. I hope other drinks were available.

I just can imagine how upset the bride might be, should she stumble across this thread her friend has started - and how upset she would be to be slated over something so trivial. No one here, other than the OP knows the bride or groom, but are happy to say negative things.

Well the OP says the couple have form for being tight so I can't imagine they'd care much.

Well I'm glad we didn't invite you, miserable lot to our wedding! I've never been to a wedding with free drinks, and would never expect to be fed at an evening do, though I would hope for food if invited all day. I would be happy to be invited to just the ceremony, as thats the important bit, would rather be invited to just the ceremony than just the evening do!

Mitzy you do make a lot of assumptions.

Calm down Santas.

Whatever way you look at it, charging £2.50 for a cup of tea is seriously bad form. It is, however, also cruel to publicise it on Mumsnet.

And fyi it's not an 'assumption'. It was stated by the OP, and her posts are all we have to go on. As with all threads on MN.

This isn't the very meanest example of a bride and groom that I've ever read on Mumsnet, but it's certainly in the Top 20.

I would not have got married if I couldn't cater for all of my guests for the whole day INCLUDING alcohol.
Isnt It enough that your guests are taking time out to come to your wedding, buy new outfits and a present , the least you can do is not let them spend a penny at your wedding.
I think it's embarrassing when you have to buy your own drinks at a wedding

Really? I can't give the gift of time but I only invited people who I felt would like to share our day. I give zero fucks what anyone wore. I didn't ask for presents.

I just wanted to get married, eat some food, chat to some people and have a dance in a chilled and casual environment.

If we had waited until we could pay the bar tab we would probably still be waiting. No one complained but lots of people loved it as it was a totally chilled and none stressful day.

How very Grabby! Of the OP that is!
Tbh OP you just come across as being very selfish and an absolute shite friend.

A friend can think whatever they want about a wedding. They don't, however, post identifying information that could humiliate their friends on a massive forum that is used as a journalists playground.

But while I'm here waves at Daily Fail (and Loose women and The Wright Stuff who are also fond of poaching threads to discuss on their shows). Because we know they will be watching this thread rubbing their hands together.

It does seem a bit off of the couple I have to say.

Surely if you're inviting guests to your wedding then you as the host provide food and drink. I guess maybe you could possibly draw the line at spirits and ask them to get those at the bar themselves.

Most guests will be bringing you presents anyway.

I suppose OP has given them the same regard they have given their guests.

Fuck me you would have hated my wedding. I didn't even provide a sit down meal... we had a late afternoon registry office wedding followed by a massive, delicious hot and cold buffet and a dance. We had some bottles of Asti and some of shloer to do toasts with but everything else drink wise was paid yourself bar.

NicknameOfAwesome that sounds like a lovely wedding to me. Ho and cold buffet, dancing, and some drinks pre bought? Plus more at the bar if you pay for some?
Sounds lovely and informal to me. Anywhere with buffet food, dancing and booze sounds great from where I'm standing!
hope you had some Conga and Ooops Upside Your Head thrown in there too

Santa - I expect most people need a drink during a day out. Charging for that is mean. Charging for anything at a wedding is mean. I know that offends a massive swathe of MNers who've got married at stately homes but it's what she think. You disagree. Fine. No one is being hysterical.

Presumably they didn't refuse any gifts given to them? So happy for their guests to shell out for them, but not happy to treat their guests as, y'know, actual guests?
What happened to actually buying a present because you WANT to buy a present? Not because you're thinking what you'll get in return?
Christ, the birth of social media has a lot to answer for. It gives you an insight into the heads of utter grabby twats who are only out for what they can get in life, or what they should expect in return for shelling out on a present.
It's totally depressing. I honestly did not give a shit how much people spent on our wedding presents, or indeed if they'd even got one. If they did, that's lovely. Much appreciated and sent thank you letters. Those who gave just a token or barely anything? Again, not bothered. It's your presence at the wedding that was important.
All this " I'm giving a present so the least I can do is not have to pay for my own drinks" thinking is utterly alien to me. FFS. Listen to yourselves.

And what about hosting guests? Not charging them for a teabag and some hot water. I hate to use that awful 'grabby' word so beloved of some on Mumsnet, but that's what this couple sound like.

I'm used to (and quite happy to!) paying for my own drinks at the bar after the meal etc. but I've never come across guests being charged for teas and coffees. Grabby twats indeed.

And what about hosting guests? Not charging them for a teabag and some hot water. I hate to use that awful 'grabby' word so beloved of some on Mumsnet, but that's what this couple sound like

Everywhere you can buy tea, coffee, and hot chocolate charges you for what amounts to a cup of hot water and a teabag. So not seeing your point.
You presumably pay it quite happily in Starbucks or whatever but not if it's a wedding where you're expecting the freebies?

I've only skim read but has anyone asked why the couple have put this particular picture up on FB after their wedding?

bullshit

So being a guest at a wedding is the same as buying a coffee at Starbucks?

Okey dokey!

You carry on raging if it makes you feel better!

I'm used to (and quite happy to!) paying for my own drinks at the bar after the meal etc.
So what's the difference in paying for a hot chocolate and paying for a pint of beer? You're apparently happy paying for one but not the other.
That makes no sense.

As I say, you carry on. You sound like you need to vent!