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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want guests to remove their shoes when walking through my house?

609 replies

MummyLizH · 13/12/2016 19:47

Not sure if I'm particularly bothered by this because it's mainly the in-laws who do it, but most people know I expect shoes off as you walk through the front door.

I've mentioned it to dh a few times, I think he thinks I'm just picking at his parents behaviour, but it makes my blood boil... I clean and hoover my home, invite you round and you tread your dirty shoes all over the floor which me and my kids sit and play on (and my little girl crawls around on) Angry. My parents have the decency to bring their slippers!

OP posts:
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8
wisba · 15/12/2016 21:54

One word - doormat.

ElleMcElle · 15/12/2016 21:56

Your house, your rules, so it's up to you and I always politely comply if I'm asked to remove my shoes BUT... inwardly, I cringe. It's naff and I agree with those who say that it indicates you care more about your floor than your guests. Makes you a poor host with clean carpets.

1horatio · 15/12/2016 21:56

Nope....

But I can give you some wipes. And liquid soap.

1horatio · 15/12/2016 21:56

wisba
😅

CarmenWedmore · 15/12/2016 21:58

This thread is fantastic. Some questions though:

  1. what's wrong with saying patio? What's the correct term?
  2. is wall to wall carpet now generally considered to be dated? Thanks in advance.
Daydream007 · 15/12/2016 22:04

YANBU especially if their shoes are dirty.

MotherofPearl · 15/12/2016 22:11

I'm afraid I must be dreadfully common. I don't insist on shoes off for guests (although I inwardly seethe when they tread mud all over my floors), but I've trained the DC to take theirs off on the front door mat. They've both done it since they were about 2. It's a source of amusement for my ILs, who are very much in the shoes on indoors camp.

Dizzybug52 · 15/12/2016 22:19

YANBU! My front door steps straight into my sitting room and I wouldn't want dirt trodden into my carpet! When i go to someone's house i always take my shoes off!

AvaCrowder · 15/12/2016 22:24

Carmen
Terrace or yard.

And yes, I think it always has been.

I do like these threads, much more than toilet brushes or chickens.

My favourite is whether horse riders should have horsey poo bags for when the horses shit on streets. You can't beat it.

1horatio · 15/12/2016 22:27

Gah!

The horse poo thread.😖😂

CarmenWedmore · 15/12/2016 22:33

Ah, I did wonder if it would be terrace. Incidentally, I grew up with a 'yard' but thought this sounded incredibly bumpkinish compared to friends' patios.

Had absolutely no idea that wall to wall carpeting was a no-no. However, DH and I have been talking about replacing the living room carpet with wood flooring. Yes. Real wood.

AvaCrowder · 15/12/2016 22:46

You go for it Carmen. I think the yards are the horse owner type yards rather than the back to backs.

1horatio · 15/12/2016 22:53

Good luck, Carmen :)

I like dark wood floors. Or the super old kinds, the ones you see in old houses or farms (not sure what's it called in English) that have the rough look and no glossy finish.

CarmenWedmore · 15/12/2016 23:01

Ooh yes they are lovely, Horatio. I am pretty certain, however, that ours will be standard B&Q oak Grin.

1horatio · 15/12/2016 23:05

I'm sure it will look great, Carmen.

Btw, I personally simply don't wall to wall carpets because I realised that they sometimes stink. And because I'm used to wood flooring.

That's the kind of flooring I meant (well, this picture is a new version of it, but it comes close)

To want guests to remove their shoes when walking through my house?
treaclesoda · 15/12/2016 23:07

I am completely easygoing about most of these things.

Shoes on or off, I don't care. The only think I care about is the expectation that I should be able to read your mind and know that you want me to take my shoes off without you actually telling me. Or worse, that you say 'oh, its ok, no need to take your shoes off' and I am meant to know that you don't actually mean it.

Antibacterial or not? I don't care, as long as the floor/toilet/sinks/worktops are cleaned. It is the cleaning action that makes the difference, not the product. Toilet brush? Well, I have one, but it is not a poo encrusted horror that people refer to on mumsnet, it is all cleaned and pristine after each use. If someone else prefers not to use one that's fine as well, just as long as they use something to clean the toilet.

The one thing I take a firm stand on is chicken. I have the absolute horror of anyone washing chicken. Why would you do something that sprays bacteria all over the place and then insist that you do it for hygiene when it is the opposite of hygienic?

1horatio · 15/12/2016 23:09

More importantly, why wash it? If you cook it all crawleys are dead anyway.

erchissick · 15/12/2016 23:45

Yep. I'm a shoes off person too. It's also the first thing I do when I go to someone else's house too. Unless they tell me keep them on.

If a 'new' guest comes to my house and asks if they need to remove shoes, I always say "if you don't mind, please," but then I do have a cream carpet! (Cannot wait to change it!)

Reebs123 · 15/12/2016 23:47

YANBU. Your house, your rules. Even if you have a door mat would you still want dog poo-stained shoes in your house? Why spend the day cleaning mud from carpets when visitors could have removed shoes in seconds. No you can't get diseases from carpets but if kids play on them & babies crawl around and eat food dropped on them then yes shoes in the house is disgusting. If you're staying as a guest in someone's house take your own comfy indoor footwear. In my culture you're expected to take your shoes off dinner party or not.

sunnymum77 · 16/12/2016 00:41

We take our shoes off, but if we have guests round I only ask them to take shoes off if they go upstairs. We have wooden floor all over apart from stairs on the carpet, so my main issue is making sure that no one walks muddy shoes into the stairs. Also with the kids' rooms, and ours, which we walk around in socks in/barefoot, I don't want them to be dirty! Think it's reasonable to ask people to take off shoes if that's what you care about in your house!

squoosh · 16/12/2016 01:48

'1) what's wrong with saying patio? What's the correct term?'

'Terrace or yard.'

I can think of nothing more Hyacinth Bucket-ish than calling a 10 foot by 10 foot paved area in the back garden a 'terrace'. To me a terrace is an area that spans the length of a stately home and leads on to acres of manicured grounds. To which the groundsmen tend.

If you live in a semi detached, 'patio' is just fine!

AvaCrowder · 16/12/2016 01:57

Squoosh agreed.

I luffs these threads. What better way to signify class blah. They are brilliant.

melj1213 · 16/12/2016 01:57

Even if you have a door mat would you still want dog poo-stained shoes in your house?

What is this obsession with people walking round houses with dog poo covered shoes?! Who doesn't notice that they've stepped in dog poo before they trek it round their entire house?

I don't have a shoes off household but I also assume that guests will show some common sense - if shoes are particularly dirty/muddy then they will take them off regardless and if not then just give them a good wipe on the doormat.

squoosh · 16/12/2016 02:02

I asked this yesterday but no one replied......

What about cats living in shoes off homes? From what I see they spend a large amount of their leisure time rubbing their genitals on kitchen surfaces.

Is cat penis on your kitchen counter ok?

squoosh · 16/12/2016 02:03

Some of you have cats so don't dodge the question!