To want guests to remove their shoes when walking through my house?

[MummyLizH]

Not sure if I'm particularly bothered by this because it's mainly the in-laws who do it, but most people know I expect shoes off as you walk through the front door.

I've mentioned it to dh a few times, I think he thinks I'm just picking at his parents behaviour, but it makes my blood boil... I clean and hoover my home, invite you round and you tread your dirty shoes all over the floor which me and my kids sit and play on (and my little girl crawls around on) . My parents have the decency to bring their slippers!

I never wear shoes indoors (can't bear slippers either,prefer being barefoot). I like visitors to take their shoes off but would never insist,and I understand that with some,e.g. workmen,or the boiler engineer,it is not very practical as they need to go outside frequently. But my main objection is not so much dirty shoes (although obviously if someone was wearing shoes caked in mud I would say something!) but stiletto heels. I still feel irritated all these years later remembering when my MIL came for Sunday lunch,wouldn't take her 4 inch high pointy heels off and left indentation marks all over our not-long-laid kitchen lino. I was NOT happy.

Treacle- think of the vomit and dog shit.....and the simple cleaning you can do on a regular basis.

We live in the country, everyone takes their boots/shoes off, (farming etiquette)
I am looking after a cocker puppy for a week, he has feet the size of side -plates.....; I am about to commit hari-kari ......

It 's just common sense to leave the earth & misc. shit outside........

I'd better stop needing my walking stick the moment I enter someone's house.

Bdum I'm sorry, I don't understand?

I want people to take their shoes off but they dont half the time - I think it's rude not to and always take my shoes off in other people's houses x

What I'm saying treacle is that a disabled person will use a walking stick or wheelchair that, shock horror, goes on the vomitty shit encrusted streets and they don't stop needing them when they visit a house. So this whole "never let the outdoors sully my indoors" thing maybe needs relaxing from time to time.

I've just had my house carpeted and will definetly expect people to remove shoes or wipe feet properly

All visiting teens know to automatically remove them and do same wherever they go, why would I want the pavement in my house.

Until MN never occurred to me I was potentially being rude although I do know certain people like my Father wouldn't want to take them off so he'll being ordered to wipe vigorously !

I grew up in a shoes off household and just thought that's what everyone did! Leaving my shoes on inside is the height of decadence for me

I don't tend to ask guests to remove theirs in our flat as I know some friends who are self-conscious about their feet or removing shoes. But most people follow suit when we take our shoes off. And I always ask if I'm in someone else's house what they'd prefer me to do.

This strikes me as the sort of non-winnable argument à la whether to rinse dishes after washing them, whether to separate laundry etc etc. People learn habits as children and these tend to stick. I do think it's nice to respect someone's preferences in their own home though.

We never wear shoes indoors and most people who visit automatically take their shoes off. Cannot understand why anybody would want shoes, that have tramped through the streets with all sorts on them, on their carpets.

Ah I get you now Bdum.

Yes, I agree.

Ahh the old shoes indoors debate. I am very stern about no shoes indoors, the thing that grates me is pil are equally strict at their house, we have to take ours off the second we get in their house yet fil repeatedly ignores this in our house despite me asking him. I get that some people think it's weird but if you do it in your own home andyou are asked to in someone else's home why would you make it into a 'thing'.

treaclesoda

Neither was I.

The only acceptable footwear in our house were slippers.

Unless it was 25 or warmer...

If you are vehemently 'no shoes indoors' how would you feel if someone came to visit who was a wheelchair user? You presumably wouldn't make them leave it at the front door?

"Hi! welcome to my home. You are welcome, your chair is welcome but please replace the wheels with these scuzzie second hand slippers to protect my delicate disposition."

Put a sign up by the door saying 'Thank you for taking your shoes off'. Also buy a supply of slip on shoe covers (about £5 for 50 of them from amazon) and have them lying out too. Then when they arrive say they are welcome to grab some shoe covers if they don't want to take their shoes off. Good Luck. I too hate it when people traipse around my house with shoes on. It is common decency to take your shoes off when you go to someone's house unless they have hard floors, in which case keeping shoes on is less of an issue.

dangermouseisace, just in case you missed this little gem on page 4 (I think by the same person who described shoes off as 'common' and 'suburban'?):

Most people I know have ancient parquet or oak boards with a Turkish rug or similar. White carpets would be laughed at in the same way one sniggers (unkindly perhaps) at people who say serviette, patio or lounge. [...] Sorry that's just how it is. We take Hunters off at back door, remove riding boots in boot room but shoes inside are fine.

I don't think I've ever read a more painfully obvious attempt at telegraphing class-consciousness on MN. I thought it was satire. But now I have doubts.

People always seem to take their shoes off when they come to our flat. I think it's because we're upstairs, and they subconsciously believe they're going to bed. It's not because I'm lower-middle-class or anything, I swear.

You can buy disposable coverings for shoes, they use them in hospitals just buy a box of those and ask people to put them on over their shoes, that way no one can be offended.

You could also offer people this:

Not sure how that would work with heels, admittedly.

And I think I prefer slippers...

Shoes on household.

Yes I do wear shoes around my own house, especially if they are comfy or boots that I can't be bothered to take off until I know I won't be going out again that day.

Hate being told to take my shoes off, find it OTT. It's not like I've been in a muddy field, mostly I walk from house to car to some other inside place, I'm very careful about not stepping in any kind of animal shit and obviously would take shoes off if they were dirty.

You can buy disposable coverings for shoes, they use them in hospitals just buy a box of those and ask people to put them on over their shoes, that way no one can be offended.

This wouldn't offend me. I'd take a mental note that the asker was batshit but it wouldn't offend me.

I just don't have guests as much as possible. I hate shoes indoors but I hate people's smelly feet even more. Better all round just not to let anyone into my house at all. Or only rarely.

No I'm not being ironic. I mean it. I'm not keen on visiting other people either because I feel awkward about it from being a guest too.

I supply over shoe covers, most guest refuse the offer then remove shoes. No prob

Oh and the thought of wearing communal slippers. Bleurgh

It is common decency to take your shoes off when you go to someone's house unless they have hard floors, in which case keeping shoes on is less of an issue.

How is it common decency though when so many people find it very rude for a visitor to remove their shoes?

I just don't get this at all.

Before we got our new carpets we had dog shit trodden into the house so now I do ask people to remove their shoes. I am surprised at how many people seem extremely inconvenienced by it, I thought it was quite a reasonable request to not want all kinds of dirt and excrement from the street walked into my house.

FIL once even made a point of walking around the mat and into the house with his shoes on so I just ignored as he obviously did it to wind me up!