Years ago I adopted a pit-bull terrier/lab X. I also had 2 rescue budgies, allowed free reign of the house, except at night time when they'd go into their cage of their own accord. One day, dopey dog leaps in the air, and catches one of the budgies in mid flight. When I eventually prised his mouth open, bird there, squawking, completely intact - but covered in doggy drool.
Same dog opened a cupboard, extracted a large Milky Bar, took it upstairs, and ate it on my bed. The wrapping was completely intact, as if a human had opened it!
Cats - eldest bringing a partridge in, and having to chase this long legged, fast running bird around the bedroom, half asleep. Oh, and the bacon thief dog reminded me of when there was a ham sandwich sitting on the coffee table. He casually walked past, flipped off the top slice of bread, and skillfully hooked out the ham. Did the same to a piece of chicken on my plate, that I hadn't quite decided I was going to finish. He made the decision for me.
Youngest cat, on arriving home I hear what sounds like a child screaming. He was following a frog down the stairs and patting it gently to make it leap and scream. Then the frog screamed at me, while I was trying to catch it.
The worst though, was when I stayed over at a friend's, and her dog ate half my sandal. I had to go home shoeless. I bloody loved those sandles as well.