You don't give chocolate to 1yr olds!

[MrsA2015]

Ok not exactly but definitely not bloody 10pm at night! I just give up. Currently staying at my nans house, it's always a constant battle regarding food and DD (13months). She's wandering around playing with toys all quiet after a terrible day battling a cold and mild temperature.Usually asleep by 8 o'clock, today she's out of sorts so I'm letting her wear herself out

Well now she's just walked in the room with 4 squares of chocolate and a packet of pom bears. she's never had pom bears or anymore than a couple of chocolate buttons

I just bloody give up. She's throwing a tantrum now because I've taken them off of her apparently this makes me unreasonable.I'm going to give them back to her just for peace I've been up since 6

God I'm commenting again, op you sound very reasonable ! Absolutely agree it's more the principle of time of night and going against your own wishes, is have been pissed off too. The tiredness and worry with poorly littlys just exacerbates the issue. Seems on here your either the extreme of of course it's fine to feed shit from weaning or yay my kid eats nothing but organic vegetables and quinoa. You sound lovely hope poppet is better today

Betty I specifically said too dogmatically. The OP took food her child wanted away from her.

That is different than sticking to a generally positive diet with a healthy balance. Food is primarily sustenance, and then afterwards we can get picky about what is good and bad.

Fwiw it sounds like you had a great approach to your dc diets, it's just unfortunate that you also come across as a bit smug.

OP dc now knows mummy labels some food bad... and that food is very powerful because it caused that interesting situation and the strange atmosphere between mummy and granny. They pick up on everything and the reaction was stupid (and I assume fuelled by a power struggle issue in their relationship much more than a square of chocolate.)

There was no perspective, it was a stupid response and while it can't be changed, acknowledging that will help op her respond more positively when this situation occurs again.

Gravy, apologies I misread that part. But smug? Because I agree it's possible and reasonable to give a child a healthy diet? 😂

That comment made you cry with laughter?

It was the "healthy home made food" comment that came across smug. If you had just said "home made food" I wouldn't have mentioned it, but the healthy sounded smug.

The implication that you considered you children's health, but it fine if others didn't.

I'm with Tootsie on this. Everything in moderation.

But Christ, I really fucking want dominos pizza now.

We all now know that it'll be a healthier choice than chocolate - so go for it!!

This thread is weird. I have seen threads in the very recent past with people being criticised for putting a petit filous and grapes in their child's lunchbox because of it being an awful lot of sugar (clutches pearls), but on this thread we have 4 month old's eating advent calendar chocolate and nobody bats an eye!

Personally I agree that 'everything in moderation' is the way to go when it comes to a child's diet. That said, I would be annoyed at a family member giving 16mo DS chocolate and crisps at 10pm so i can see the OPs point.

It's very normal that some people will be obsessed and anxious about food because that's how it is all marketed to us. Fear sells. Outrage sells. Superiority sells. Feeling overwhelmed sells.

• Don't eat this food it gives you cancer (eat our product instead).
• pesticides are the devil (eat our organic food instead)
• life is so hard, you can't prepare a scratch meal every night (eat our convenience food instead!)

-buy this book

• join up to this dietary group

Just relax. Stop trying to neurotically control every aspect of your child's life. It's sustenance, not life threatening poison. Work on instilling in your child will-power, resilience, positivity, autonomy, self trust, self respect, responsibility, critical thinking. In fact work on instilling them in yourself and everything else will fall into place.

Fair enough gravy I understand You find the word 'healthy' to be smug and interpret an emoji as a real life reaction . Raised eyebrow and bemused smile here!!

I do and it's a pity because most of what you said was very rational and useful.

To be quite honest I use the word healthy as that's what I try and cook, it's just what happens I find it appyfor the family and ends up as a cheaper option . The 'unhealthy ' stuff tends to make a bigger dent in our funds. I'm also not going to lie and say that's all they have, fish fingers waffles etc are always in the freezer for emergencies!! At the moment I'm just relieved they don't like mc Ds etc and it would be a money waster rather than a treat. But again I absolutely see why op was so pissed off but I'm also sure she'll be able to react differently in the future if she wishes and maybe have a compromise.

What age are you dc? From your earlier post about how you brought them up on homemade food and now they choose that I thought they were flown the nest. But your last comment implies they are still at home and young enough to be cooked for.

If it's the former I'm confused about the 'emergency' fishfingers, if it's the latter I'm not sure you've yet earned the authority to state whether your approach worked or not. (Check back in once they are fending for themselves )

18 , 7 and 5. 18 yr old house shares, is independent and has so far continued to eat the way she was brought up. I'm slightly belwildered by this, it seems bizarre to be quizzed simply because I'm happy with giving my children a healthy diet. They aren't denied foods if they want, I'm not sure why having a supply of emergency frozen food to have has been focused on- perhaps you're expecting me to say I'm super mum who cooks every single meal from scratch and never comes home after a 14 HR working day to knackered to cook?Regarding how they choose to eat later on that's up to them , I'm happy I've given them a good start and skills to fend for themselves. Odd the way some choose to nitpick here, the joys of a faceless internet!

I think you are really misunderstanding me. I'm interested, not nitpicking. I'd be perfectly happy to discuss this in RL (although I might have withheld the smug observation depending on the tone of voice you used )

I suppose I am quizzing but you offered information and I'm interested in clarification. Sorry if you feel attacked.

(I was assuming a more traditional gap in your dc ages - once you clarified it made perfect sense.)

Gravy I think we've misunderstood each other which I think is very easy here. Apologies , I had in no way intended to come across as smug or appear to have any self importance over my own views! Have a lovely Christmas