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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

You don't give chocolate to 1yr olds!

116 replies

MrsA2015 · 09/12/2016 22:32

Ok not exactly but definitely not bloody 10pm at night! I just give up. Currently staying at my nans house, it's always a constant battle regarding food and DD (13months). She's wandering around playing with toys all quiet after a terrible day battling a cold and mild temperature.Usually asleep by 8 o'clock, today she's out of sorts so I'm letting her wear herself out

Well now she's just walked in the room with 4 squares of chocolate and a packet of pom bears. she's never had pom bears or anymore than a couple of chocolate buttons

I just bloody give up. She's throwing a tantrum now because I've taken them off of her apparently this makes me unreasonable.I'm going to give them back to her just for peace I've been up since 6

OP posts:

Pluto30 · 13/12/2016 07:24

user

00100001 · 13/12/2016 07:58

lottie

It's more about the generalisation of people judigong others about what they feed their kids.

One: it's SFA to do with others, unless they are causing the child health problems.

two: bandying around statements along the lines of "Ohhh, the salt intake is too high...it's really bad...it's inappropriate...it's shocking..." etc is nonsense unless you know what is in the food. The Dominos pizza shows us that. On the surface "OMG YOU FED A DOMINO'S PIZZA TO A BABY?!" but in reality, they probably had a bit more salt than they would have got from say.... cheese on toast and no-one would have batted an eyelid at that.

Original poster

MrsA2015 · 13/12/2016 13:24

I think it depends on the food really even the style it's cooked in. For instance I wouldn't give my DD some of the home cooked meals I've had because of the amount of oil,salt,butter or sugar I've put in. A tiny bit of something won't kill but my original issue was the TIME of day combined with the fact it was goodies that annoyed me

OP posts:

Tootsiepops · 13/12/2016 20:06

I'm the hideous mother from upthread that fed my one year old dominos.

If it makes anyone Lottie feel any better, today she ate toast and a banana for breakfast, a tuna and cucumber sandwich and a bit of cheese for lunch, and pasta and broccoli followed by yogurt for dinner. She snacked on rice cakes and bits of cucumber.

I trust that's all in order and the food police Lottie will feel less shocked and horrified by my horrendous parenting.

kali110 · 13/12/2016 20:17

Tootsiepops you terrible mother you ( this made me laugh at 2 in the morning )

LottieDoubtie · 14/12/2016 15:11

at the idea of me being the food police!

I really think this thread has got out of hand! Dominos isn't suitable food for a baby/toddler. I'm sure she doesn't eat it all the time. You don't need to justify that to me (or anyone else).

RhodaBorrocks · 14/12/2016 15:50

Tootsie, don't you know that unable has Mercury in it?! [Clutches pearls]

Nah seriously, just get them eating when they're poorly. Like OP I'd be more annoyed by someone ignoring/overruling my decisions as a parent.

My DS has ASD and can eat a load of shit at times, but hell, he's EATING SOMETHING! I'm far happier for him to have half a Domino's (he's 9) or add salt and pepper to his roast dinner than the alternative, which was having to see consultants about the fact he didn't eat and was underweight. He's still underweight, just not worryingly so any more and one of the key things to get him eating more was allowing a little bit of salt to be added. Oh and I have POTS and hronic hypotension (low bp) so everything I eat gets covered in salt because my GP won't prescribe salt tablets for me and without stupid amounts of salt I get fainty.

RhodaBorrocks · 14/12/2016 15:51

*tuna, not unable
*chronic, not hronic

madein1995 · 14/12/2016 16:41

I dont think choc late at night is good (choc at night gives me nightmates) but other than that I think most little ones can eat what adults eat. A bit of chocolate each day from the advent calender (half of obe for eg) I think fine. A few bites of piizza, ok, likewise a few chips. Just feed them normal everyday meals pureed - i dont think anyone needs to cook 2 meals. The poster who said a 1 yo eating pizza is terrible, im supposing is the kind of person who calls for a takeaway once the kids are in bed

00100001 · 14/12/2016 16:58

but lottie you could say that cake, chocolate, crisps, ice cream, sweets, flapjacks, cheerios etc aren't suitable food for a baby/toddler.

Yet they eat them and no-one bats an eye lid.... because they're (mostly) eaten in moderation. So why the to-do over a few mouthfuls of Domino's pizza?

LottieDoubtie · 14/12/2016 20:35

Because I don't believe that a mouthful of chocolate is as 'bad' as a mouthful of 'dominoes'.

It's fine, you don't have to agree with me

Original poster

MrsA2015 · 14/12/2016 20:43

I think the issue with the pizza is perhaps it's seen as an unhealthy main meal (assuming it was dinner) whereas cakes and chocolates are small treats that aren't relied on for nutrition. I understand both sides of the argument and will admit to giving DD garlic bread when we've ordered in and probably wouldn't take pizza off of her if she got hold of it but it wouldn't be a main meal of choice( I would've made sure she had her own dinner pouch or homecooked) . tootsie you're not a terrible mother! Poorly children are difficult to look after and being worried if they're hungry is a stress in itself!

OP posts:

00100001 · 14/12/2016 21:05

Why do you think its worse though?

What are you even basing that on?

Let's say for the sake of argument that 1 square of a 45g bar if cadbury dairy milk is a "mouthful". And there are six squares in a bar.

And that 1 "mouthful" of pizza is approximately 1/6 of slice of pizza. (Just for hyperbole.)

So, the [[https://www.cadbury.co.uk/products/dairy-milk-2360?p=2360 nutritional content off the square of chocolate (dividing all figures by 6... That many squares in a 45g bar)
40 kcals
4g sugar
1.3g sat fat
0.01g of salt

1/6 slice of pizza (large, classic crust, cheese and tomato) from upthread link

26 kcals
0.51g sugar
0.45g sat fat
0.11g salt

So unfact the only thing that is " worse" is the salt, each "mouthful" of pizza contains an extra 0.1g of salt.

But the sugar content of the chocolate and the higher sat fat levels point to the pizza actually being the "better" or .... appropriate choice?

00100001 · 14/12/2016 21:07

Link fail

kali110 · 14/12/2016 22:29

Because dominoes is seen as awful, (doesn't matter if you look at the actual content and a few mouthfuls as a one off is fine) yet giving a choc everyday is encouraged?
00100001 that really breaks it down!

Original poster

MrsA2015 · 14/12/2016 23:50

I think MNHQ should rename this thread

OP posts:

GravyAndShite · 15/12/2016 00:25

Tootsiepops · 15/12/2016 00:37

See, Lottie - you say you're laughing at the idea of you being the food police, but then catagorically state 'Dominos isn't suitable food for a baby/toddler' as if it's an absolute fact rather than just your opinion. Which does make you sound rather like the food police.

My personal approach to food with my daughter is that no food item will ever be 'bad', nothing will be restricted, treats will never be linked to behaviour and we will talk about food in terms of health and nutrition rather than diets.

I do wonder if your own issues with food are clouding your judgement on this somewhat?

I'm not trying to be arsey, btw. I have massive food issues. I wasn't allowed sweets etc until I was three - it did me no good whatsoever.

I don't know. Maybe I'm taking it too far in the other direction and being too lax, but I really, really don't think there's anything wrong at all with giving a poorly, food refusing toddler a few bites of pizza.

She has also been offered chocolate and cake, but she throws both straight on the floor I'm considering a return to the IVF clinic for a dna test as I'm pretty sure no child of mine would do that

GravyAndShite · 16/12/2016 07:15

OP does it seem so terrible a view days later with the benefit of perspective?

Mummy2two25 · 16/12/2016 07:40

I think you overreacted a bit its a one off thing and wont do any harm

Bettyspants · 16/12/2016 07:48

Bit bewildered that someone said children don't get sugar highs?! Rubbish. Yes yanbu . Yes there's loads of people who think those of us that want to avoid chocolate and sweets etc are being precious. Really? I just wanted my kids to have a healthy diet and no they didn't have sweets or crisps at age one because it was my choice for my children. Family knew that and respected it I fail to see why anyone would deliberately feed a child something they know the parent would prefer they didn't have? And to do that st 10pm is just a bit on the stupid side. Stick with what you want for your child.

GravyAndShite · 16/12/2016 08:00

I do worry that focusing too dogmatically on a healthy diet is often at the cost of a healthy relationship with food and eating.

Bettyspants · 16/12/2016 08:19

Gravy why on earth would focusing on a healthy diet be at the cost of a healthy relationship with food? Seriously the op wants her one year old child to have a healthy diet and has made these feelings clear. A family member gives chocolate and crisps at ten pm at night...failing to see how there's a backlash on op . My own kids were brought up on healthy home made food because that was what I wanted for them, fitted in with the family meals and was cheaper to make . Of course I then get the comments about 'depriving my children treats, being a perfect parent! Etc etc why on earth can't people respect others way of feeding their kids? For the record they all have healthy appetites generally choose healthy foods and are not ' deprived' Lordy. Choose to feed your child pizza at one that's your decision. Stick to a healthy diet omg! Deprivation 😂

Bettyspants · 16/12/2016 08:23

Addition of COURSE any extreme with food has the potential to create an unhealthy relationship with food, that goes for those that feed their kids crap as well as the extreme healthy options . I can not see how this applies to the op ?? I'm assuming it's FB which also explains a bit why she's so upset I would have reacted just the same but taken a slightly calmer quietly pissed off approach for children 2 and 3

Olympiathequeen · 16/12/2016 08:28

Not sure why the 10 pm thing is important or a little bit of chocolate

If she's not well and off her normal food a little bit of energy rich foods isn't goi g to kill her. The sugar rush thing is supposed to be a myth, and even not it's very short lived.

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