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Original poster

How much of a prat am I going to look if I ask them to replace this tree?

157 replies

MrsKoala · 03/12/2016 08:27

We ordered an xmas tree of a certain size to be delivered this morning. Yesterday i went out and when i got home a tree was outside the front door and there was a message saying they were dropping it early. The tree looked bigger than i want so i measured it and it's 2ft bigger than ordered. It wont fit in our living room. We wanted one which was floor to ceiling.

We don't have tools and things, or the time or inclination to be chopping bits off. Where we would need to chop off the top would mean it looks ridiculous and wouldn't have a 'point' anymore.

I want to call and tell them to collect it and deliver one the right size. Will i look like a twat? I understand it must be hard to find exactly the right size tree to order, but they do advertise trees by size and i'd rather a smaller one if necessary.

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Lorelei76 · 03/12/2016 13:21

OP you're not the Margo I'm afraid, you literally can't fit their wrong tree into the room.

If you tell the delivery staff that you don't care about their sisters, then you can be Margo Grin

Original poster
MrsKoala · 03/12/2016 13:26

Can i be the 'spirit of Margo'? (i try to think 'what would Margo do in this situation', then order something from John Lewis)

OP posts:
Lorelei76 · 03/12/2016 14:12

Sure!
You could make t shirts saying " what would Margo do?"

maisiejones · 03/12/2016 16:22

This thread brings back memories for me. When I was a child my dad was a long distance tanker driver. He was coming home for Christmas and while driving near Tunbridge Wells saw Christmas trees for sale at the side of the road. He stopped to buy one and lashed it to the side of his petrol tanker and it was so big it reached from one end to the other. He then had to drive his tanker to our house to drop off the tree. Fortunately we lived in a big Victorian house with very high ceilings but he still had to get his saw out. The huge tree was wonderful and even though he's now 92, we still laugh when we remember 'that tree from Tunbridge Wells'.

Original poster
MrsKoala · 03/12/2016 16:59

Ha! my tree is from Tunbridge Wells. Perhaps they just make them extra big down here?

I'm defo going to have a t-shirt embroidered (or maybe appliquéd with some seventiestastic material i have) with 'what would Margo do' (my motto used to be 'what would Zammo do?' after i picked up an ice cream he dropped in the q for the croydon cinema snacks. But i think since i have moved to the suburbs i should upgrade to Margo Leadbetter).

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Original poster
MrsKoala · 03/12/2016 21:54

The tree arrived. Here it is naked. Unfortunately our stand won't hold it so it's propped against the window. Have to go to b&q again tomorrow morning for a bigger one. And so starts the 4 times a week visits to b&q for 'essential' xmas items.

How much of a prat am I going to look if I ask them to replace this tree?
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Oldraver · 03/12/2016 22:06

As a kid we always had an artificial tree and I had always wanted a real one. So the first year we were married I saw a Christmas Tree for sale at a house in our town and went and knocked on the door.

I was told to go round into the garden and the owner would get his spade and be round. When I got there I saw a massive garden and to one side a row of humungous probably 30 ft tall pine trees..I can remember looking at them in shock and repeating...."I only wanted a 6ft-er"

The owner then took us into an area behind the big trees where his Christmas Tree farm/copse was...we chose our tree, it got cut down and we were happy bunnies. Bought (6ft) trees from him for years.

We now live in a house built on the Christmas Tree farm...last week I finally had to have the huge trees felled as they were mostly dead

AnnieAnoniMouse · 04/12/2016 14:21

It's a little small, I think the 11fter would have been perfect with a little trim of the single bit at the top 😂

ValaMalDoran · 04/12/2016 14:58

Get some rope lights and make a portal tree.

How much of a prat am I going to look if I ask them to replace this tree?
Original poster
MrsKoala · 05/12/2016 18:47

Oh dear. It won't stand up.

I still have no idea what a portal tree is. Confused

How much of a prat am I going to look if I ask them to replace this tree?
OP posts:
derxa · 05/12/2016 18:58
Grin
BringMeTea · 05/12/2016 19:04

You do make ma laugh MrsKoala. It's a cracking tree.

BringMeTea · 05/12/2016 19:06

Me even. My mother is fairly humourless.

GingerIvy · 05/12/2016 19:13

The first time we bought a real tree, I didn't realise that our saw was not up to the task. Luckily, I had an electric circular saw. Cue me and my 16yo dd laying the tree across 3 kitchen chairs, and going after the bottom of it with the circular saw. Buzzzzzz, FLIP! Buzzzzzzz, FLIP! Needles flying everywhere each time we flipped the tree a bit more. It looked afterwards like it had been attacked by a pack of rabid beavers at the base, and the floor was literally green with needles.

Still makes me chuckle thinking of how much we laughed as we flipped that tree around a bit more to buzz through the base. Xmas Grin

festivefucker · 05/12/2016 19:17

May I say .. lovely tree and love your red walls ( my favourite colour! ) Xmas Grin

festivefucker · 05/12/2016 19:18

My red tree Tada!!!! Xmas Smile

How much of a prat am I going to look if I ask them to replace this tree?
GingerIvy · 05/12/2016 19:24

You could decorate it laying down like that, I suppose, OP. Just tell everyone you're going for a more "laid-back" look this year. Xmas Grin

Original poster
MrsKoala · 05/12/2016 19:28

The pitiful thing is the boys have been decorating it like that. We keep finding them hanging decs on it and have to tell them that this isn't the way it's meant to be.

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Original poster
MrsKoala · 05/12/2016 19:31

Lovely tree festive. I think people need to start posting pics of their trees. (We love the red too btw, the rest of the house is equally colourful)

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festivefucker · 05/12/2016 19:33

My dd started decorating while half was still in the box!
I gave up and let her Xmas Grin

HemanOrSheRa · 05/12/2016 19:47

Grin MrsKoala Have you wept a few silent tears yet? It ain't Christmas here until I've had a minor breakdown over The Erecting Of The Tree Grin.

dowhatnow · 05/12/2016 19:50

More christmas tree pics please everyone.

StillaChocoholic · 05/12/2016 20:12

Portal is a game where you shoot "portals" into walls or objects so that you can walk through them i.e. A portal from the wall to the ceiling so a portal tree is designed to look like it's going through one of these portals from the game.
Hope that helps MrsK Grin

DillDongMerrilyOnHigh · 05/12/2016 21:04

This is ours! First time in about 10 years we've not had a real one Xmas Sad but I cba disposing of it after Christmas

How much of a prat am I going to look if I ask them to replace this tree?
Believeitornot · 05/12/2016 21:08

What kind of stand do you have? We ordered a special one from a Christmas tree website and it is massive.