To not want to go along with this? (Re: Santa!)

[MrsJohanHegg]

Myself and DSis (and our respective other halves!) both have 2yo DSs. We're both on the same page re: Santa - that he brings the stockings and one present. It works for us, it's what our mum did, DC learn that they can't just ask Santa for umpty-million expensive things etc. So when I put my tree up, I popped some wrapped presents underneath to hide the cheap wonky base to look pleasant and festive.

Well I've just had an earful from SiL as she popped by with our older nephew (6) who is now asking why we had presents under our tree when Santa brings them etc. Apparently in their house Santa brings all the presents. I told her to tell him they're just for show if it's an issue, and thought all was fine, but she later told DH that they also tell him that Santa brings all the presents from other people too!

So literally they'll visit his various grandparents, aunts etc and they'll pull out a present and say "Oh, Santa left this here for you - he must have gotten confused!" and it's expected that when we see him on Boxing Day and give him his gift we're expected to do the same when we give him his gift.

AIBU to think that this is completely fucking batshit a bit OTT/ridiculous and not want to go along with it? Why can't it just be a nice gift from us, his aunt and uncle?? I don't bloody want to say it's from Santa, I want the credit

I agree "Knackered". We only moved to giving the main thing from us when we realised that DSs would think that we hadn't bought them anything and it wasn't for the credit, just that we were all giving each other gifts but we wouldn't be giving them anything so it would look odd....and suspicious. :)

Now that they are teenagers and know it's us, we are happy to give everything from Santa again :o

Well I have this utter nonsense with my step son.
My other half and his ex said all pressies come from Santa and they give him a small gift so the kid who is spoilt enough already thinks he can ask for everything ps4 arsenal season ticket etc etc and he will get it because and I quote that's the magic of Christmas
But I was as were my children by me that Santa brings stockings and big ones are from us so they know we care and we gift them nice things and they know it's not bloody Christmas magic but we worked hard etc they were always excited and very pleased with DVDs character gifts and chocolates and annuals Santa gave them.
Last year we had Xmas morning alone so step son could open with das and grandad and mine opened with me so no conflict only this year we have him during the day not morning and he has demanded he opens his pressies with my kids well my kids have to wait and change routine as its all about this spoilt kid but being asked to pretend Santa gave them everything I'm not bloody doing!!

Surely if he's old enough to asking for PS4 and arsenal season tickets he must be old enough to know that there is no Santa? maybe this is the year you tell him OP

Santa brings one present and the stocking, everything else is from who its from , parents, auntie etc there is a brilliant letter doing the rounds from "santa" telling everyone to stop saying he ends all the presents, it is brilliant but I can't find it!

battgirl that sounds like a really impossible situation for you!! w

I'm amazed how many of you want the 'credit'

It's not about 'credit', but teaching your child that they aren't the centre of the universe and a magical being delivers whatever your little heart desires. Santa brings a stocking here, other presents are from whoever gives them to him. He also knows that I take him shopping for the gifts he gives to others and he helps me wrap them and makes a card for them. Gift giving is also about doing something special for someone else.

YANBU

It's not about 'credit', but teaching your child that they aren't the centre of the universe and a magical being delivers whatever your little heart desires. Santa brings a stocking here, other presents are from whoever gives them to him.

For a lot I know it is about the credit, they openly say it is! However Father Christmas brings all the presents DH and I buy to our children. It's what happened with DH and I, neither of us had stockings, we had a pillowcase full of gifts. We didn't really know about other ways Father Christmas worked until we spoke to parents of our DC friends.
We managed to grow up without believing we were the centre of the universe, and we weren't given everything we wanted. I asked for a game boy for about 5 years! Our children don't either. We don't encourage them to write lists and send them to FC, he brings surprises. Lists come later when they are older.

One of my best memories was DS2 telling me, when he was about 7, That Santa is amazing because he always brings him exactly what he wants even though he doesn't even know himself what he wants. :)

Well done me!

It's not about "credit" to me. I have a limited budget and don't want my children to have wild expectations about what Santa can deliver!!

Santa delivering all the gifts doesn't = getting everything your heart desires. It depends what you choose to give them. My dd has always understood that you can't have everything you desire. A list for Santa is a wish list, not a demand list! Santa has lots of children to deliver to of course, not just you.

Santa fills stockings.

Friends and family give presents.

Op YANBU. My DD came up with this last year for her 5yr DS. This year - having mastered the art of writing - his letter to Santa fills an A4 and is enough to make a retail magnate weep. We always had that Santa brought a stocking (a very practical one some years) and anything else was from the named person. How is it, that if everything comes from Santa - mum has to see the letter/ take a pic before it is sent?

Girl at work has just posted nearly £600, yes, £600 worth of lego for sale for £300 as child has changed his list to santa.
Personally I wouldn't be spending that much on 3 lego kits in the first place & then changing it with 3 weeks to go!!
That's not to mention all the other pressies he's getting.
Ooh & his sibling too.
It must be second mortgage xmas in that house!!!
Santa will have to hire pickford's for deliveries if he brings it all in that house!!!

Yes mine have stockings from Santa and one present from him under the tree. (Older 2 are too old and know it's from us but join in for their little brother) I have made sure they know the expensive gifts are from us right from a young age. Santa usually gets them a game or something small. I wanted them to know it's us spending money. And I definitely think they should know who other gifts are from. Then they can write and thanks individual people.
It got a bit complicated though when we started making up Christmas gift boxes to go out to Africa when they started asking "but why doesn't Santa take them nice presents too?"

I have to add that I said above expensive gifts are from us. I say that because expensive may mean one thing to one family and another thing somewhere else. So a lot of their friends get very expensive gifts and a few of their friends get a lot less. So I have said people have different budgets. So they know their present is on our budget. It's nothing to do with credit to parents. My son came home from school when he was 6 saying that his friends tooth fairy gave £5 so why does ours give £1 so surely if Santa brings all the gifts then why would he spend a lot more on one family and not much on another? (Someone may have said this already, I've not read all)

Our family do santa brings ds some presents, i buy ds some presents, and then everyone else who wants to buys ds presents does so. The stocking just appears on xmas day filled with things. Santa puts all the presents into ds' santa sack on xmas eve.

ROFL at 'the credit'!!! You get retrospective credit anyway!

weepat I can't even imagine!!

My MIL tried to impose this Santa brings all rubbish on us. It's apparently a regional thing. I'm from further north and we don't have this silly bollocks.i had a year or two when I had to get it in firmly. She still does "oh look what Santa left for you at our house ". I just ignore it and dd just gets presents so she's happy. If she starts a forensic examination of our respective positions then, so be it. She's 9 .

YANBU - if all the presents come from Santa how is your nephew going to be able to write his thank you letters? Or is that not a tradition in SIL's family either? Not writing or emailing or phoning to say thank you is the most annoying habit of the lot in my book.

My DM would insist that we only opened presents on Christmas Day from people who were with us on Christmas Day and then could open a limited number on each of the remaining 12 days of Christmas but only once we had handed over neatly written and correctly spelt thank you letters for the presents we'd unwrapped the previous day. Harsh but a good message to learn. I'm not so strict but do expect letters written at some point before they go back to school in January. DDs used to grumble until the year one star of a TA wrote a personalised letter to every single child that had given her a present - they were so thrilled to get a letter that they have never grumbled again.

Mrs JohannHegg, is your SIL Spanish? because that´s what they've always done (albeit with the there Kings and not Santa).

Whats good for you is good for you, and vice versa. SIL is unreasonable to ask you to change, but so are you for wanting her to do things your way. Its Christmas. Forget it and have fun