To think the nativity play is a waste of time...

[PointyJat]

And the biggest parts are given to teachers favourites/those with pushy parents?

Ds is in year R and they've spent weeks preparing. He and his friend say they spend lots of time sitting in the hall watching the main parts 'practice'. Teacher has cancelled PE since half term for this 'practice'.

Only a few children have a big part, the rest are varying levels of nothing ds is a 'villager' but doesn't even go on stage, he just sings the songs along with all of the others.

Nativity seems like a waste of time and a lot of waiting about, other than for a minority of pupils. I'd rather either all children got a part with a similar level of input, or they just stopped bothering with the play and did PE as usual. Aibu (and grumpy).

I think one of the problems with the nativity feeling the same children get the main parts is that it is a once a year thing.
This also means that I'll bet the teachers don't consider who has had a part the previous year-that's if they even remember.

At my school we had the Christmas show(everyone in), the Easter Eistedford (everyone from years 5-6, and some others)and the Summer Performance (everyone in year 5-6 and some others), and an assembly every term which was just the class plus 9 lessons and carols (1 child from each form doing a reading), Harvest festival (similar) and sometimes other things. Most children over those 6 performances got something that they were happy with. I don't remember any complaints (except from Sally when I was Cinderella rather than her)

Now the dc's school does Christmas show and 1 assembly. The Christmas show is done year by year with over 100 children in the year and about a dozen parts. The assemblies are often 1-2 children speaking throughout with the other children waving odd things.
It's no wonder they pick the same children because well over half the children have never been given any practice at speaking out loud in the hall except at auditions.
At my primary, any child who was not managing to project their voice by the end of year 1 would have (very much envied) extra lessons with the head to help them.

I have 1 child who was always picked (including the year we asked for her not to be), 1 child who was never picked and 1 child whose idea of a nightmare is to be picked.

YABU
I love the nativity plays. I don't think the children care who gets the top roles, my two were always happy to dress up and sing their hearts out.
I remember being so excited that my parents could come and see what we were doing in school. There's my mum, IN SCHOOL!! I can tell there's lots of DC feel the same from the way they wave to their parents, even though we only left them in the yard ten minutes before.
Bit sad this was my last nativity play this year

YANBU I have older children who are almost at the end of primary and it is something that really irritates me - and I am glad some teachers are here to see this.
We have a nativity for the little ones and the older ones do a general play -
I understand that you pick the most confident children for the main parts. BUT what that means is the confident ones become more confident ones, the ones more likely to be picked and it knocks the confidence of the less confident ones.
In our school it is always the same children with the main parts in plays and assemblies etc throughout the school. (And there is a bit of 'diplomatic' choosing - for parent helpers etc but that isn't the main factor - in DD1s class the 'star' pupil's parent didn't even show up to most fundraisers...). I guess the other teachers see them do well and know they will do well for their play etc.

DD1 didn't care - DD2 does -she wants a part. She had SLT in reception so she obviously didn't get a speaking part - then she got one line in the next one ...which she did well. Since she has always been in the 'chorus' - I have told her do you best, try hard, put yourself forward and you might get picked. She is in her last show and she is in the chorus - doesn't even get on stage. She can handle disappointment...but I have realised how much it has affected her confidence. For the latest show they auditioned in pairs - she didn't audition with one of her friends (who is really good) because that might spoil her friend's chances of getting a part . Yes she now thinks she is that 'bad'.
Like I said DD1 was never picked - in the last assembly some of the children get to say their favourite memory - hers was a shared one (equal roles) with one of the 'stars' - even though the 'star' was presenting anyway in the assembly DD1 didn't even get to say her memory - the star did. And DD1 did have to talk in front of a large group for outside school thing - I was worried but she did it flawlessly - she could do it - just never got the chance in school.
I think schools should make more effort in giving equal roles to ALL children who want them (if they don't fair enough) -- choose plays etc that give all the children a chance to shine. So what if one mumbles etc -it is a school play not Shakespeare -all the parents really want is to see their DC.
I don't want to go to the play this year - more than an hour sitting on a hard plastic chair probably struggling to be able to even see DD - whilst I am boosting the confidence of already confident children.

I never got starring roles in plays but I did get to read in assemblies a fair bit. Hmm. The kids who did get big roles were usually the ones on school council or who were house captains etc.
Confidence does not always mean great acting either. Actors are not necessarily super confident either. How many actors/comedians/artists have said that they have anxiety/mental health issues?? And agree with PP who said non-confident kids who nonetheless want a part don't get opportunities to gain confidence.

I love the nativity! It's the cutest thing....but then I did have a Mary ;-)

I have 2 DD's and somehow ended up with two Mary's this year.

Dd1 only started at this school after the October half term. Initially she was a king - taking the part of the child who left. The original Mary decided she did not want to sing a solo () and asked to do another part instead. The teacher asked the children to put themselves forward if they wanted to be Mary, they then held (at playtime) X factor style auditions until it came down to the final two, the name was then picked out of a hat and dd1 was the one picked. She is in yr2. At her previous school she was also Mary, not sure how they picked that time.

Dd2 is in reception, she is a very shy child and last year at pre-school she sat on my lap during the play - she was a donkey. It would seem that she has been picked at Mary to bring her out of her shell a bit more, so I guess we'll see.

So there you have it, both DD's as Mary in two separate plays. We are not involved with the PTA, in fact we haven't even been to anything the school has done since dd2 started in September. As far as I know neither DD is teachers 'pet' or anything but I'm sure that won't stop parents gossiping about us.

Unlucky, everything you've said applies equally to sports teams. Getting picked means the good ones keep getting better, doesn't do much for the confidence of everyone else.

I've never heard a whisper of complaint about that.

I agree it's not Shakespeare and that's not the point, but why can't parents understand that teachers want to put on an objectively 'good' show, which involves using the best kids.

I'm with you unlucky83

Surely it's best tgat schools focus on education not fussing around on school stages. I'd much rather tgey spent the time helping to ensure that my child could read about Christmas, write a story about his Christmas and add up the corrected wealth gifted by the three wise me in terms of today's economic conditions!
As for the pompous comments regarding parents who attend the PTA being the ones who spend time practicing lines with their children! That's fine for a SAHM with a cleaner and a range in the driveway, in some families both parents have to work!
As you can tell I'm really more interested in the educational preparation of my children rather than the filling of the photo album.

laurie we are talking about primary school....
At our primary on eg the football team every child who goes to regular practice gets to go on the team. And they are pretty fair about it - maybe the better players get a more regular place ...but actually I have never heard anyone comment about it (and I have about the play/assemblies)...and if they aren't on the team and they really wanted to be they aren't more or less forced to stand on the side lines cheering (which is basically what being in the chorus is -a supporting role). My DD doesn't play football - I don't go to watch matches ...I especially wouldn't go to see my child standing on the sidelines cheering...but if I don't go to the play/assemblies I am not supporting her.
Also being on a stage (centre stage...) takes confidence and at reception age that is not necessarily acting skills. And IME the children with the main roles in the play are the ones that talk at assemblies because they might have clear speaking voices rather than acting skills - but also the confidence to do it. And the boost to their confidence means then throughout the school they become the ones that are chosen for everything - to be on committees, quiz teams, house captains etc because they put themselves forward. DD2 was interested in doing something but in the end didn't put herself forward as she wouldn't be picked - X had put themselves forward and they were one of the 'chosen ones'.
All I am saying is all the children should have a chance - and IME that doesn't happen.
(I also wondering how many people would chose to go to a primary school show if their child wasn't in it...they are never that good a show!)

In my experience demanding that your child gets a speaking part pretty much guarantees that they won't.

And yes, parents actually do this.

Why is it a waste of time if you don't get a main part? Not the attitude I wanted to instil in my children.

*LaurieMarlow" always wanted the best part

Light the touch paper and retire.

Bugger!

Light the touch paper and retreat.

I've had a Mary, two wise men and two sheep. I've never been on the Pta, I don't even go to parents evenings!

As for the pompous comments regarding parents who attend the PTA being the ones who spend time practicing lines with their children! That's fine for a SAHM with a cleaner and a range in the driveway, in some families both parents have to work!

Blimey, hit a nerve there, did I?

Ironic, as I only thought of it because I myself don't have time or the inclination to join the PTA and I struggle to fit all the kids' homework in

Oh God no. I love love love them! I've had shepherd's, stars, the tail end of a donkey , a thief the chorus line and currently a chicken. I have also had a narrator which was my least favourite as I didn't get to actually SEE them.
I have been equally proud and crying soppy tears for all roles.
I've never had a Mary or a Joseph.

I notice a couple of people on here say their dc had Delayed speech or speech and language therapy so didn't get a speaking part. My ds has SEN including speech problems. He wasn't given a chance to audition this year and wouldn't have got a part because if this. That is quite clearly disability discrimination. Adaptions are made for children in wheelchairs but not with speech difficulties, my ds would have loved to have had a part. It would have engaged him and given a very much needed boost to his confidence. Why doesn't he have the same right to that as other children? (I have other battles with the school so I am not fighting this one).

If your range is in your driveway then something's gone horribly wrong! Ours is in the kitchen. I never considered that my car and my cooker are tge reasons my daughter was Mary. She's not even blonde. Go car!

And I have never been on the pta, and the only time I have ever had contact with the teachers have been parent teacher meetings so I'm certainly not pushy!

Come to think of it maybe if I joined the pta I'll have a Joseph next year lol.

I am a retired Infant teacher and am now feeling really nostalgic for nativity plays. It is hard work, and no, not every child can have a big part- my own son had one line in Year 2, but other than that he was usually a villager, or 5th shepherd. It didn't spoil my enjoyment, and the best bits were when children fluffed their lines, dropped baby Jesus or shouted 'I need a weeee' right in the middle. Most parents enjoy seeing other people's children as well as their own, especially their children's friends.

And just a suggestion. For the younger classes they pick the names out of hats for all roles at our primary.

Larry. They are TOTALLY the best bits!