Teacher making comments relating to pupils periods?

[Meadows76]

Fuck. DD came home today and casually (whilst ranting about her English lesson) mentioned that her teacher had said something about her mood and what week it was. I can't remember the exact wording of it, but it was a direct dig at the fact that she may be on her period, which as it happens, she is.

Totally out of order?

Fair enough, OP, but I think I would need to hear the comment verbatim before I joined the masses in condemning the teacher. Make sure your facts are straight before you go into the meeting with the Head. And bear in mind that the teacher may have a quite different recollection.

Please find out all of the facts. The facts? The teacher made a comment about my daughters mood and the fact she must be on period week, the fact is that NEVER should have happened, regardless of anything else. I am however taking steps to find out exactly what happened, starting with seeing the head teacher.

Inappropriate, indeed.

Utterly unacceptable.

I always try to see the teacher's side of things, being one, and knowing how things can sometimes get lost in translation, but this is totally unacceptable.

I'd establish exactly what was said, and then...

I'd be asking for an apology from him to her in front of the whole class (or whoever it was who heard) and be insisting on some equality training.

And if the HT doesn't seem interested, escalate it to the governing body and if that brings no joy, escalate it.

Make sure your facts are straight before you go into the meeting with the Head. And bear in mind that the teacher may have a quite different recollection makemsure my facts are straight? He made a comment about my daughters mood and the fact that she must be on her period this week. That is fact. It is also completely unacceptable. He may have a different recollection? I don't really care. There are at least six other people who heard him

I'd be asking for an apology from him to her in front of the whole class she would be mortified at that

Totally inappropriate. 10 years ago when I was learning to drive my driving instructor made a joke that 'maybe I was driving badly because it was the wrong time of the month'. I was so embarassed as a late teen, it felt so inappopriate and I didn't know what to say. Nowadays I'd challenge or calmly pull up the car and get out, but at that age, trying to learn how to do something, with someone in a position of 'power' over me - no chance. It's rude and misogynistic at best, and downright creepy at worst.

It's not fact - you can't even remember what he is supposed to have said

It is reported information and vague at that. I strongly suggest you ask your DD for the wording before you go on, but even then it isn't a 'fact'.

but how are you going to convince the Head if you can't remember what he said? well DD will be there, she knows what was said.

It's not fact - you can't even remember what he is supposed to have said

It is fact that the comment was made. That I can't remember the exact wording is irrelevant as I wasn't there. DD knows what was said, as do several members of the class.

Great. The Head will undoubtedly listen to what she has to say and then ask the teacher for his side. Which is as it should be.

He could have said 'you seem to be in a right mood this particular week' or 'is there anything about this week (more homework from other teachers/the week before your play) that's making you more moody'.

Which could mean anything but she took to mean periods.

I'm not saying it didn't mean periods and that he may be a mysoginistic arsehole but you're going to look like a right trolley if he meant before the geography test later

I'd be asking for an apology from him to her in front of the whole class she would be mortified at that

Of course she would.

Dur.

But he should apologise to her. And the rest still stands.

Just very cross on your daughter's behalf.

It is reported information and vague at that. I strongly suggest you ask your DD for the wording before you go on, but even then it isn't a 'fact'.. Yes it is a fact. He made the comment. I don't need you to strongly suggest I ask the exact wording before I go in to school. Im not a fucking idiot, I have set up a meeting with myself, the head and my DD - she is the one who knows exactly what wasn't aid as she is the one that it was said to.

OP, that is not the definition of a fact and I suspect you know that. You can choose to believe your DD but it is a choice. Others may have heard it but clearly you haven't spoken to them or you might remember the comment. The Head will treat this as what it is: an allegation.

He could have said 'you seem to be in a right mood this particular week' or 'is there anything about this week (more homework from other teachers/the week before your play) that's making you more moody'. Which could mean anything but she took to mean periods. I'm not saying it didn't mean periods and that he may be a mysoginistic arsehole but you're going to look like a right trolley. Jesus. I, going to look like a trolley???? He didn't hint at the period thing he outright made a comment about her mood and the fact she must be on her period. Ffs.

OP, that is not the definition of a fact and I suspect you know that. You can choose to believe your DD but it is a choice. Others may have heard it but clearly you haven't spoken to them or you might remember the comment. The Head will treat this as what it is: an allegation DD tells me ateacher is making comments about her period it is my absolute job to believe her 100%

Meadows76

DD knows what was said, as do several members of the class

If the HT investigates this fully (which he should do) he will ask all of the class.

You need as much detail as possible. Not vague hearsay

Great. The Head will undoubtedly listen to what she has to say and then ask the teacher for his side. Which is as it should be I agree. I never said anything else

DD tells me ateacher is making comments about her period it is my absolute job to believe her 100%

I didn't say otherwise. That doesn't make it true. Doesn't make it false either. It is yet to be established what he said.

I'm with those who say that you need to hear the whole comment. If he didn't specifically mention periods then he could have been referring to a whole range of things. Lots of my students are a bit 'off' at the moment because they are exhausted: it's reaching that point in the term when they are starting to flag before the excitement of Christmas boosts them up again. It really is a moody week for lots of kids this week, girls and boys, which is nothing to do with their menstrual cycles.

Ok Meadows, in your original post you didn't say he actually said the word 'period'

Are you dealing with your daughter being moody and disrespectful to her teacher, or are you purely frothing at teachers sexist response?

Do you know if he has a go at male pupils for having high testosterone levels and being "boisterous" too?

X-posted with your other replies. If he did directly reference periods then you are following the correct course of action.

You need as much detail as possible. Not vague hearsay

I'm getting fucking tired now.

I am not going in with vague hearsay I am supporting my DD in passing over to the head the direct dialect between herself and the teacher.

Just because I didn't remember the exact wording she told me when I posted does not mean there are no details. DD knows exactly what was said.