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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

But it's OUR drive...

482 replies

amammabear · 22/11/2016 12:11

Our drive is directly opposite the drive of the house opposite, it's a quite, dead end street so not much traffic. When I reverse off if, I turn as I do so that I'm facing the right way on the road and then off I go, the person who lives opposite however (in his perfect BMW with private plates...) doesn't do this. He instead reverses straight across the road, onto OUR drive, then drives off again.

Normally this only annoys me a little, but today, as I was reversing out of our garage I noticed he had his reverse logged on and then started moving so I stopped outside of the garage, on the drive. By the time I'd stopped, I noticed that he was fully back on his own drive. So because he saw I was going to be in his way, instead of reversing properly, onto the road instead of someone else's property, he went back out of reverse, and drove back on.

So being annoyed, I waited. And waited. And the insert name for irritating person here waited too. Eventually I had to leave, shaking my head at him, and watched in my mirrors as he priced he had been specifically waiting for our drive by reversing straight across as usual.

AIBU to be annoyed about this? It's our private property, that we have to pay to buy and maintain? I know it's quite a little thing and it doesn't usually bother me too much more than a minor irritation, but today it really infuriated me.

OP posts:
Aberchips · 22/11/2016 14:19

If he changes his car to a clapped out old Fiesta will you let him reverse onto your drive then OP? Wink

amammabear · 22/11/2016 14:20

Wouldhave if I'd had the kids, I'd have sent one in!

OP posts:
Lorelei76 · 22/11/2016 14:20

OP if he actually sat and waited for you, he must be a shit driver? Maybe I'm picturing this wrong but I can't see what he gets from reversing into your drive?

Mouseinahole · 22/11/2016 14:23

How about a chain loop across the entrance for a few days? It would be easy for you to unhook it when you needed to.

bookeatingboy · 22/11/2016 14:27

mrs koala If you read my post you will see how it can indeed become a big deal.

In my case it was only my car and garage that got damaged, it could have been one of my children.

I

PrivatePike · 22/11/2016 14:29

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

hanban89 · 22/11/2016 14:30

This would annoy me. We live next to a school and regularly have people doing this in our drive to get back out the street. It's worse when they completely block us in! DH has to leave for work about 8.55 when the school drop offs are happening and regularly has to wait for the parent to come back to unblock drive. Soooo annoying!

HeartsTrumpDiamonds · 22/11/2016 14:32

I have never understood this English possessiveness about drives. In Canada everyone uses everyone else's driveways to make u-turns - it's safer, gives you more space, doesn't disrupt traffic as much. We are even TAUGHT to do so when learning to drive!! So it took me quite a while to un-learn this behaviour when we lived in London. DH never un-learned it and would always use our neighbours' drives to turn around with me cringing in the passenger seat, because I knew it was Not The Done Thing. Grin

SirChenjin · 22/11/2016 14:36

This would annoy me too (I am perfectly capable of being annoyed by the really major stuff going on in the world too - go and start a thread abut it and I'll post on that too, instead of the snarky little 'you sound uptight' posts).

I like to be able to use my driveway - and my kids to be able to use it - without worrying/hoping that my neighbour is going to reverse into us. I also like people to show respect and ask before they do something like this.

brownpurse · 22/11/2016 14:37

A neighbour of mine spent several months in hospital after someone reversed fast across the road from one drive to another and failed to see her.

SirChenjin · 22/11/2016 14:37

Oh - and I live in Scotland Hearts, it's not just an English thing Wink

Solange1973 · 22/11/2016 14:38

Sounds like the guy is a lousy driver to me!
I would say start using his drive to show him how ridiculous it is, but then he might think he is justified in continuing to use your drive!
I would leave my car in my drive as often as I can. That way he might have to learn to reverse and turn at the same time! Wink

bimbobaggins · 22/11/2016 14:38

This wouldn't bother me. Why don't you reverse onto your drive. Not that will solve your problem but I always reverse onto mine. It's much easier just to drive off

NavyandWhite · 22/11/2016 14:39

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

QueenMortificado · 22/11/2016 14:40

I just couldn't get worked up to care about this

PrivatePike · 22/11/2016 14:40

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SirChenjin · 22/11/2016 14:42

No really - it's her property and she can give any reason she so chooses. If he wants to use it it's up to him to give his reasons and then the OP can decide whether she's happy for him to continue or not.

Anatidae · 22/11/2016 14:42

It's a safety issue - what if a child was playing out there?

LaurieMarlow · 22/11/2016 14:46

Really don't see how anyone could get worked up about this.

DinosaursRoar · 22/11/2016 14:46

NavyandWhite - but of course "because I don't want you to" is a good enough reason for telling someone they can't use something of yours without asking first. He doesn't have a right to use her driveway that only can be ended by her having a good enough reason to tell him not to.

amammabear · 22/11/2016 14:46

Hanban89 I see that a lot at our school, I go further to turn around somewhere else, I just can't understand how people can do it!

OP posts:
EvansOvalPies · 22/11/2016 14:48

You'd need a good enough reason rather than " because it's mine and I don't want you to

Just out of interest - why would you? So if someone decided to have a picnic in the summer in your garden, you'd have to have a good enough reason other than 'because it's my garden and I don't want you to' to ask them to stop?

We live on a private road, and people using it as a car park is a nightmare (especially at school pick-up times). We do have to pay to maintain the road, and because it is our road, it is incredibly annoying to have people using it to park, particularly if that then stops us from parking in our own road, which we have bought and continuously pay for.

SoupDragon · 22/11/2016 14:49

He has private plates. That tells you all you need to know about him!

Only if you're a bit thick.

gettingbythistime · 22/11/2016 14:49

They are notorious for being driven either too fast/aggressively/tailgaters and/or basically make their own rules ie stop where they like, rarely give way or thank those who give way to them. The list is endless

Zaratall · 22/11/2016 14:50

Why do you care? What's going to happen? Is your drive going to wear out because he reverses into it?

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