He's going to end up sleeping on the sofa at this rate!

[MadJeffBarn]

Stupid argument but it's really starting to piss me off!
I can't sleep when it's hot. Even in winter, I like to have the window cracked open slightly so there's a fresh breeze around the room. Our room gets quite stuffy because we have the heating on at the night for the kids, and we don't like coming down to a cold living room.
He insists on keeping the window closed because he doesn't like being cold. Aibu in thinking that's what the bloody duvet is for? He can easily warm up, but I can't as easily cool down in a warm stuffy room.

[YeOldMa]

I like the window open, DH likes it closed. I wait until he goes to sleep and then I open the window if it is too hot for me.

[Pemba]

Surely nobody needs to keep the heating on all night, unless you have a newborn, or someone in the house is very ill. Or you actually live in Antarctica. I didn't realise people really did this.

How un-green of them, not to mention extravagant.

[crispandcheesesanwichplease]

When I was a kid (in a freezing cold council house with just a gas fire in the living room so the rest of the house was very cold) I had to sleep with my feet outside the covers, otherwise I was too hot and couldn't breathe.

As an adult I can't drive without the window open a crack because it is too stuffy and hot.

As an adult at home I feel the cold but still need to keep the bedroom window open a crack however cold it is. The combination of hot and/or too stuffy is like suffocating and interrupts my sleep like mad. So it's a massive issue for me because I bloody need my sleep!

[MissVictoria]

Normally i'd take the it's better to be too cold and put more on than too warm and can't take anything else off, but YABU.
Even if he has a blanket on, that won't keep his head and face warm. What is he supposed to do, wear a balaclava in bed?

[danadas]

I am always too hot and OH is always freezing. I go and stand outside for a bit before bed to get quite cool, then whip my PJs off (back in the house, I don't want to end up on some sort of register..) and then go to bed in the knack with no covers.

[onemorecupofcoffeefortheroad]

Can only sleep in a cold bedroom and have to have the windows open all year round coupled with a nice warm duvet heating definitely off. Partly it's the fresh air. I'm fortunate my long suffering partner doesn't mind, however there was the famous occasion when I was asked "onemorecup is there any chance we could shut the window now - there's snow blowing in my face?" . The DC have been known to come into our room in the morning to ask for something and complain that's it's like an ice box in there.
Can't bear the heating on at night. Can't stand staying in places where you can't open the window. Other than that I'm a joy to sleep with 😄

[Blu]

LOL at Onemorecup.

The stuffiness from the monitors would be unbearable for me. I think you need to open the windows for 10mins before you go to bed and swoosh fresh air in by flapping the door.

I bet the kids are too hot. Turn the heating off!

[RhiWrites]

I like a window open and so does my partner. Without it we overheat and the bed gets sweaty. With it we're just right.

We don't have the heating on overnight though. OP's the first person I've even heard of doing that.

[RoseGoldHippie]

I have window open even when it's snowing

Oh I love having the window open when it snows and sit there all cuddled up with a hot water bottle and coffee feeling the cool breeze against my face!
Favourite thing to do!!

[ChippyDucks]

I'm with you, I need fresh air to sleep well, even if that air is freezing. I feet suffocated if the window is closed, so it's open all year round. Can he not just have an extra blanket over his side of the duvet?

[HermioneJeanGranger]

Turn the heating off - kids will be fine so long as they have warm pajamas and a duvet they can cover up with. Then you probably won't need the windows open all night.

[Bluntness100]

Another one for window closed in winter, I can't imagine waking up and seeing my breath in the morning. I think if that's your norm, well then it's fairly unusual and uou are the unreasonable one here. Sorry,

[EBearhug]

I don't heat the bedroom and I sleep with the window open. Sleeping with the heating on means I wake dehydrated and headachey.

You could go German and have two single duvets rather than share a double. That means one of you can have a thin one, the other a thick one. I'd still want fresh air in the night though, with the window open.

I don't have anyone to share the bed with, though.


Even if he has a blanket on, that won't keep his head and face warm. What is he supposed to do, wear a balaclava in bed?

A nightcap, like they used to in the old days.

[shovetheholly]

I'm the same - I have to have the window open and heating off. You don't wake up and see your breath in the morning - it's nothing like that cold - just a bit of ventilation!

I think it depends a bit how bad the sleeping problems are. If it's just fuss and personal preference, that's a bit different to a really debilitating problem. DH is very sensitive to light and sleeps very little anyway. So we have really heavy, drapey blackout curtains which I HATE. But he has a huge job and a load of responsibility and genuinely can't sleep unless it's very dark - so I have to compromise on this.

[LonnyVonnyWilsonFrickett]

I'd blast the room with air just before bedtime. If three bits of kit are blowing air into the room it will be stuffy and ... not fresh. I don't like recycled air! But I think if you air the room well for a good 15 mins that will make a difference. Then close the window, everyone's happy.

[PhilODox]

Put a bed in the office! He'll be toasty, you can be cool in the bedroom.

[BaggyCheeks]

I can very rarely sleep well with the bedroom window fully closed - it has to be at least on the latch to allow some fresh air flow, unless it's really cold. I'm in Scotland, and it's been at least -2 overnight here the past couple of nights. I grew up in an old house without heating upstairs though, so our home never dropping below 19 all year round is positively tropical for me.

[PhilODox]

Argh- are you saying his 'office' is your bedroom?

[QueenArseClangers]

There's a difference between windows wide open and just cracked an inch. How else do you rid your bedchamber of eau de night fart?

[Boatmum1]

Actually I think your DH needs to man up a bit and just snuggle down under that duvet!

We live on a narrowboat, and the only thing that bothers me about our home, is not the chemical toilet, tiny bath or the skinny corridors that make it impossible to gain more than 6lb lest I get stuck (being pregnant was... Interesting) ... It's the bloody lack of Windows in the back cabin bedroomthat I would very much like to be open when I sleep!

Much older and much more delicate DP likes the wood burner blasting heat, winter duvet and closed hatches ... I like gentle glow in the fire, thin blanket and open hatches..

Which is why the new bedroom we're adding at the front of the boat has no woodburner and two fully openable hatches for me... and storage for a massive duvet for the poor little poppet

[witsender]

Yanbu, our trickle vents are always open, fresh air is important! But I wouldn't have the heating on in overnight

[BakeOffBiscuits]

My friend lives in an eco house and she's always complaining about how it's too warm, she finds it really stuffy unless a window is open, but doesn't like them open at night so has a big fan by the bed. They've decided to move and have chosen a drafty Victorian cottage.

[NothingMoreThanFelines]

Team OP here. YANBU. I hate a stuffy bedroom and we have the window open just a crack, whatever the temperature. As you say, it's easy to snuggle up under the duvet and get warm but you can't cool down in an overheated room.

[MyballsareSandy2015]

Love the window open all year round, even if it's snowing. No heating on at night. Luckily DH is the same.

I'm currently struggling at work as the rest of the office likes red hot radiators and closed windows. By lunchtime I'm bright red and head achey, it's horrible.

[Judydreamsofhorses]

It was -4 here last night - having the bedroom window open would kill me!