to use James on a girl?

[AyGirl]

Am overdue. Baby has not arrived. Do not know gender. Have finally after much indecision, decided a girl will be Iris James. Mentioned to DB who got very upset and kept on saying it's not a girls name. Mother has rang me this morning and said he was so upset because he wants to name a son of his James. Keep in mind he is not married or having a child. I do think they are TTC. But I want to use Iris James!!!!! She said that I shouldn't and should save it for him because it will be his first child and a son. So what, the two beautiful little girls I've delivered into our family are nothing. A boy will probably be Gage Theodore.

My older DDs are Hattie Juniper and Cleo Annika so we use quite different names.

Yes, not a reason not to use it, that was just my original explanation for why I didn't think it sounded as nice as some others did.

Of course lots of people don't mind it, it was just my personal opinion that it didn't flow that well saying it. It doesn't matter but just one of the things I thought about when naming. Also the fact it is a boys name makes the whole thing sound more masculine than, say, Amelia James, as Iris is a beautiful, but strong sounding name.

Jane for e.g goes very well with my dd's strong/long name but if I'd used Iris as a first name I think I would have gone for something like Elizabeth as a middle instead as it just flows better to my ear.

I disregarded a few names I liked as they didn't flow well with the surname initial.

Iris Elizabeth is nice yes :) I have no real opinion on whether the OP should use James tbh but I was baffled by the repeated references to Irish. Thanks for shedding some light on it!

I love it! Fantastic name. You use whatever name you like. It means something to your dh being his dad's name whereas I'm guessing it means nothing to your brother other than a name he likes which he could still use. I hope your little isn't too late and delivered safely. Let us know pink or blue 😊

I don't have a middle name and very few people know my daughter's (unusual) one - which she can choose to use or ignore. Don't know why so much fuss is made about them.

Personally I'd shy away from using a common name anyway, and bound to cause confusion when used for opposite-to-'normal' gender, but DB has no more right over it. Iris was a front runner for me :-)

It's all very well saying 'choose whatever name you want to, it's entirely up to you', but surely you have to consider that you are giving that name to another person and they will have it for life. THEY are the ones who have to live with it, so it's important to consider what effect that name might have on them.
It's not all about what you want or like.

As someone else said, perhaps Jaime instead of James? All names sound made up and absolutely horrific, but they're not my children so do as you please..

How about Brian?

Hatemrtumble what a thoroughly unpleasant person you are. I hope your children are kinder than you.

Waah, people on this site are jolly rude

Middle names don't matter a jot. Use it or don't- totally up to you. I doubt my DB could tell you what my kids' middle names are. It really is completely unimportant.

Your DB is being controlling.
You can't bagsy a name in the hope that you'll one day have a son!
In any case, it wouldn't matter at all that it's the same as your DDs middle name.
You DB is being ridiculous!
Please stick to your guns - Iris James is lovely and goes well with your other names

(Remind your DB that most aunties/uncles can't even remember the middle names of their nieces and nephews! Mine certainly can't. It's a total non issue)

Prefer Jaime personally

What sort of a name is Gage btw??

Iris Jaime sounds awful to me. Iris James flows much better. I considered James as a middle name for both my girls as it's a family name.
Why can't your brother still use it? If your not planning a double barrel for her then who cares if it's her middle name and potentially his sons first name.

*youre ☺️

I like Jamie but not James for a girl. You and your daughter will spend your lives explaining. Its not fun. (says mother of child with foreign name)

As nice as it is, lots of people will think your child is a boy and will be confused. If you don't mind that then go for it :) To be honest tho kids seem to dislike their names until they get older. Someone always has a better name than them.
If you don't mind all the questions, debates and confusion around James for a girl then go for it. And to be honest some people like that sort of thing, so if you do, go for it.

It's your child - call them what you like. (I have a DN called 'Jack Tiger', which we thought was odd, but he loves it) . At least you picked a real name, not some made up flummery.

Your brother can't 'bag' names. Ridiculous!

If you want to call your daughter James, then do. Totally your call.

I was an Uni 20 years ago with a (lovely) girl whose middle name was Peter. She was never stuck for conversation.

James s boys name and used as a middle name will be assumed to be a family surname or worse still people may think you really wished for a boy. Also your child may not thank you for giving her a name that is usually associated with the opposite sex as it may be used as a weapon for bullying and teasing later. Why not use the rare feminine form of the name instead which is Jamesina?

Haven't read whole thread but omg op Iris James is SO COOL. I'd love to be called that. She can just say her middle name is Jamie if she's not keen.

But then I have kids with unusual names and I know someone whose son has a female middle name. So it doesn't strike me as at all OTT.

Call your baby whatever you want, sil and I were pregnant at the same time and she said we couldn't use Connor as she wanted it. Turns out her dp didn't like it so they called baby something else and had 2 girls subsequently!! Your baby, your choice, he can still use the name if it's that important and he gets the chance. Tell dp and your Mum to get a grip!!

Sorry db

If you like it, go for it. What others think or say is irrelevant.
Don't discuss what you're naming your children with anyone else, people always have an opinion. Your brother is being petulant and he is perfectly within his rights to call any son (that he may or may not have) James, irrespective of what you call your offspring, boy or girl.

What a BEAUTIFUL name!! Dont be swayed it's your baby and he doesn't have a child and may never!!! What an idiot he is and your mum is out of order. For all those questioning the name ignore them it's stunning. You don't want to know what my son is called but trust me ppl always get funny about original names! Be brave! Congratulations