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to feel annoyance when my childless colleagues keep saying how tired they are?

263 replies

sandyballs · 12/02/2007 12:08

They don't know the meaning of the word

OP posts:

Dinosaur · 12/02/2007 12:11

Yes, and in their case it's almost certainly self-inflicted. No sympathy .


poppiesinaline · 12/02/2007 12:11

Oh don't even get me started on this.

I had a childless friend who used to moan constantly about being tired and not having enough time to herself

I remember I could take no more one day after being up half the night yet again with DD and yelling at her

"Tired!!1 tired !!!??? you wait until you have had 3 hours sleep - and that's broken up into 1/2 hour slots and then you have to look after a baby and a toddler all day - not sitting down all day AT ALL and then go another night without sleep..... THEN YOU WILL KNOW THE MEANING OF THE WORD TIRED!!!!!!"

She never moaned to me after that

She has just had her 2nd baby ... now she knows the meaning of the word 'tired'


PeachyClairColouredRoses · 12/02/2007 12:11

Well it does depend on ther lives you know!

Some people care for older relatives, or suffer insomnia and some live with really noisy neighbours!

Mind you when my fellow students (the under 20's) complain about work life balance issues (eg, Uni- tesco PT job- pub) it amkes me both giggle and


DrDaddy · 12/02/2007 12:13

We had some (childless) friends over on sat afternoon. After about 2 hours with us and our 2 boys (under 3) they said how exhausting children are! I choked on my cup of coffee and said, "Welcome to our world!"


hunkermunker · 12/02/2007 12:13

Not unreasonable at all.

I had a colleague who complained he didn't have any time to himself during the week.

I murdered him.


hunkermunker · 12/02/2007 12:14

Btw, this colleague was complaining that by the time he'd been to the gym, met some friends for lunch, been and done his weekly shop, had a lie-in on a Sunday and done his washing, there really wasn't any time he could call his own.


Dinosaur · 12/02/2007 12:16

No wonder you saw red .


AitchTwoOh · 12/02/2007 12:17

oi, who died and made you lot the tiredness police? i dream of the days when i'd do nothing all day, yawn once and moan about being tired...


hunkermunker · 12/02/2007 12:18

Thing is, if you beef about how you're tired too much, you might get "well, you chose to have them!" trilled at you.

I don't mention that I work 40 hours a week, haven't had a full night's sleep in over a year, only have one weekend day off work, am moving house and have two children under three. Because I know there are other people who do all that and don't have a husband who lets them sleep in on a Saturday because he knows I get too shouty if he doesn't


Olihan · 12/02/2007 12:20

DH was working away last week - nice hotel, all food included, etc - leaving me at home with the 3 dcs who are 3.1, 17 months and 6 weeks. the first night he was away I was up with all 3 of them at various points through the night, I think I ended up having about 3 hours broken sleep.

DH phoned in the morningand announced he was knackered because the hotel was on a busy road and it had kept him awake .

After I'd said my piece he didn't mention it again .


TrinityRhino · 12/02/2007 12:20

I have a single friend who always says he is tired.
he only dies it once per visit becayse i cut him off saying' seriously, you don'y actually know what tired is'


poppiesinaline · 12/02/2007 12:21

I think before you have children you think you do get tired..

then you have children and realise that tiredness actually has another level


Bugsy2 · 12/02/2007 12:24

offer to staple her eyelids open for her! Usually shuts them up!


DrunkenSailor · 12/02/2007 12:33

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

mawbroon · 12/02/2007 12:35

Well, I was constantly tired before I had ds. I am less tired now (ds is 15 months)than I was back then so I would have been one of the ones who annoyed you if I had happened to mention it.
On a similar subject, I always was annoyed when people referred to me (or any other childless singleton) as having "no responsibilities". Erm, so a job, mortgage, bills etc etc aren't responsibilities? I accept that people with children also have these responsibilites as well as looking after their children, but that doesn't mean that single childless people have ZERO responsibility! And now I have ds, all these responsibilites are shared with DH so I actually feel like I have less!


hunkermunker · 12/02/2007 12:37

Why are you less tired now, Mawbroon? You have a child who sleeps?


MascaraOHara · 12/02/2007 12:38

yes you are unreasonable, it's all relative


pooka · 12/02/2007 12:43

Agree that it's all relative. I was one of the people saying how tired I felt, going to bed at 10.30pm at the latest and chaning into pj's as soon as I got home after work. While a woman in my office with 4 children was going to bed at midnight, getting up at 6am and dealing with night wakings.

Obviously, I feel a little embarrassed now! But just one of those situations where it's impossible to empathise because you've never reaised how time-consuming and exhausting children can be.


mawbroon · 12/02/2007 12:43

I don't know why Hunker. Erm, yes, he does sleep (mostly).

There was a period when I was working full time in a physical job and gigging three nights a week with a band (always in places at least and hour's drive away) so getting to bed at 3am then up again at 6.30am for work the next day. When ds was first born, I was actually less tired and sleep deprived than I was during that period. Now I am in bed at a reasonable hour and get a full night's sleep most nights (except for the odd gig here and there which results in a 2am bedtime).

Actually, I think that explains why I am less tired now!!


blueshoes · 12/02/2007 12:43

Agree, sandy. But then again, though I did not complain, when I was childless, I did late nighters in the office, night after night for weeks at a time. I have since given up that life and swapped one tiredness for another


fennel · 12/02/2007 12:45

I think you're perfectly reasonable, those people are just thoughtless and wrong.

What I hate is when I get back to work after a holiday and people say "did you have a nice rest". REST? with 3 small children? Pah.


boredwithwaitingforminiMOSSY · 12/02/2007 12:45

I don't think you're being unreasonable to feel annoyed, I am sure I will only know true tiredness when my lo is born!

But you have to remember, yes, perhaps they're tired because they've been out partying (oh but it does so take it out of you, a double header at weekend and a shocking comedown on Monday morning poor things). But at the same time, they could be tired because they are skint and so work a second job at weekends!

Or they could just be pg and suffering with exhaustion and morning sickness and haven't told anyone the real reason yet!


hunkermunker · 12/02/2007 12:46

I was actually exhausted at one point before I had children - I had endometriosis so badly I had worse-than-labour pain every day, all my insides were stuck together with adhesions and I was on the waiting list for surgery. I also had a boss who bullied me to within an inch of my life.

So I guess I am about as tired as then, but much happier, so that helps!


fryalot · 12/02/2007 12:49

I went through a stage where I was running a pub (it was up for sale but hadn't sold yet), had a one year old, an eleven year old and I was 8 months pg with the third. I was working about 80 hours a week as well as trying to look after the los. My Saturday girl came in and said that she was tired as she had been partying the night before so I gave her what for "you don't know the meaning of the word....." and she replied: "Well, it was your choice" which kind of shut me up really.


wheresthehamster · 12/02/2007 12:56

It's all relative because if a mum starts going on about how tired she always is with one child you secretly think you don't know you're born.

Likewise if I say the same (as a mother of 3) to someone with 5 or more they probably think what a wimp I am.

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