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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Be absolutely honest. If you could do it all again, would you have had kids ?

502 replies

Pisssssedofff · 02/11/2016 07:43

I'll answer later.

OP posts:
Jemmajamjar · 03/11/2016 22:27

I have 3 children 17,16 & 7. The answer is proberly, but I didn't enjoy the oldest two as babies, they were so close together I just didn't have time for them individually (or even remember the first few years of their lives for that matter, it's all a blur). Then I got pregnant at 29, gave birth at 30 and I have so much more time and patience for my baby, however he's taken my independence again, and feel a bit of resentment. Plus teenagers are arseholes.... & ive got it all to look forward to again in a few years haha. I've changed my mind NO.... only joking can't wait for grand kids.

MerryInthechelseahotel · 03/11/2016 22:29

expat Flowers

notquiteruralbliss · 03/11/2016 22:34

Yes absolutely. And maybe started earlier so I could have had more than 4.

SalemSaberhagen · 03/11/2016 22:37

I love my 2yo DD with a ferocity that astonishes me. I do regularly day dream about having no responsibilities though.

Ladydepp · 03/11/2016 22:42

Yes, and I would have started earlier and had at least 4.

Although you might question this if you'd seen me losing my shit with the 13yo tonight. Grin

DuchessOfPodd · 03/11/2016 22:45

Definitely yes. I remember saying to DH, why do we need children when we have each other and are so happy? Then I had DCs starting at 34, youngest born at 40 but I didn't miss the freedom, it's been replaced by so much love that I didn't know I could have. I also doubted I'd have enough room to love a second as much as the first, but I was wrong. They have taught me how to really laugh and love, they keep me active. The only thing I regret is that DH and I don't get as much one-on-one time any more. That for us both is totally the toughest thing about having kids.

GiddyGiddyGoat · 03/11/2016 22:46

Absolutely I would. If I had my time over I'd have had more!

ZippyNeedsFeeding · 03/11/2016 22:47

Yes, no question. There are plenty of things I regret, but I could never regret having my children. They are so many different kinds of fabulous!

nonameqt · 03/11/2016 22:49

No. I had never planned on having any children.

Awwlookatmybabyspider · 03/11/2016 22:53

Absolutely, but. If I'd have had my way dd would have came out at 2 years old. I adore them at that age.
They're so full of fun and Wonder.
I found they new born stage really boring

plannedshock · 03/11/2016 22:54

I'm now shitting my pants at the thought of teens

Aroundtheworldandback · 03/11/2016 22:56

GrinLancelottie they were fully clothed but but I guess I was just lucky!

Bummymummy77 · 03/11/2016 22:57

Expat - SadFlowers

GoLightlyHollie · 03/11/2016 23:01

I had to think about it for a second but yes. I couldn't imagine life without DC. I stopped at 1 though-she's 3 now-and I'm glad I did. It's much easier to do things with just one and both DH and I still get time to ourselves both separately and as a couple.
Dreamt I was pregnant with a second the other night and I have never woken up so relieved!

Aroundtheworldandback · 03/11/2016 23:02

Now my kids are 16 & 19 and I'm happy married to their lovely stepdad, having no financial worries Dh & I can hopefully look forward to please g-d 25 odd years of freedom and travel. I loved the baby stage so much, but wasn't happily married then so feel cheated out of really enjoying it.

ElectronicDischarge · 03/11/2016 23:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

blueshoes · 03/11/2016 23:54

I am not particularly maternal and not a natural mother. Dh was more keen on the idea of children than me. My dcs are now 13 and 10 and yes, I would do it again (but shudder at the baby/toddler/pre-school years).

Stanleysmum01 · 03/11/2016 23:55

Expat Flowers, my son's autistic too though an only child, are you getting any help, family worker, ASD groups etc? I'm in Cambridgeshire so system maybe different here but Pinpoint really helped me maybe they have equivalent near you.

Mycatsaninja · 04/11/2016 00:39

I have four DC and my only son has ASD and at 20 is very hard work ! I would still have had four but with a different (better) DH life might have been a helluva lot easier on me and them !! Sad

robinia · 04/11/2016 00:48

Absolutely yes.
Five kids, had first aged 30 and last aged 40. Bit of a gap between 4 and 5, which I'd prefer to have been smaller. But other than that, absolutely nothing I would change.

4catsaremylife · 04/11/2016 01:28

I have 3dc now grown up, even though 2 have ASD and the other has MH issues and I became a single mum because my ex couldn't cope with their needs I would still have them even knowing how hard it would be. Simply put they are the best of me.

TulipChewlip · 04/11/2016 01:43

No. I would have gotten dogs earlier.

Mlb123 · 04/11/2016 02:13

I definetly would as I love being a mother and adore my children and feel I would be incomplete without them x

MadisonAvenue · 04/11/2016 02:17

Without a doubt, yes! And if I could do it all again I would've had a third rather than stopping at two.

Drama99 · 04/11/2016 02:44

Absolutely 100% yes