To think it's expensive being single

[rainyinnovember]

Mortgage / rent is more expensive
Council tax
Entertainment
Bills
Shopping

Or am I missing something

How is it a choice? You can't force someone into a relationship with you.

I'm sure there's plenty you could do to attract a mate if you wanted one

What if no one likes you/you don't like anyone??

You can always find someone, and lower your standards. IF the main reason for getting coupled up is to have lower costs.

I mean I wouldn't, but then I wouldn't be here complaining that being single is expensive.

I've plenty of friends who are single and it certainly isn't by choice. They haven't met anyone who likes them or wants to be with them.

What, me? I doubt it but anyway that isn't the point really. No one should feel like they have to find a 'mate' for financial reasons should they?

OP isn't complaining and she isn't single. I thought it was an observation, and agree that society is set up in favour of couples rather than singletons.

Being single isn't necessarily a choice. There are plenty of single mums on here who've been dumped by someone who then refuses to have the children in the evening so the mum can go out.

Indeed, Nugget :)

If your single there are so many options open to you. You don't need to be in a relationship to not be lonely or pay too much in rent. You can live with friends, or in a big share house with strangers etc.

When i was single i live in a big share house while studying and then for the first few years of work while saving up money to travel, take language courses, a deposit for a house etc.

And of course it's more expensive being single! Same mortgage, electricity, gas, water and internet costs. Council tax is a bit cheaper, but not 50%. Just one salary to pay for it.

There's worst reasons to shack up I guess. If I could do it all again I doubt if get married and have kids but I'm a cynical divorcee

'You can live with friends'

All my friends are in relationships so I personally couldn't.

Maybe I could find new friends but this would involve being sociable which is expensive.

'Or in a house share with strangers'

Doesn't appeal to be honest. I could, but does anyone seriously be wanting to live like a student in their 30s/40s?

'There are many options open to you'

If you are single and well paid, maybe. If you are single earning minimum wage, not so much.

I don't think you can choose not to be single. You can decide that you don't want to be and you can try to change that situation. But you can't just choose not to be single and hey presto you suddenly aren't anymore!

Going back to the original point. If your single most of those expenses can be split without being in a relationship just by being in a share house.

Yes, but again, living in a house share in your twenties is one thing. Living in a house share in your 40s not so much.

I just googled house shares near me. They are around £380 p/m. When I first got married our mortgage was £700 pm so I'm not sure you'd save that much.

If you are single and well paid, maybe. If you are single earning minimum wage, not so much

Exactly the same as if you are in a couple then?

Yes INeed that's it. You can choose to be single and choose to not be in a couple but you can't just choose not to be single/be in a couple!

No user because two people earning minimum wage and splitting the costs will be better off than one person on minimum wage.

Am I speaking gobbledegook here, seriously?

It was me saying I'd cut back to the bone because I was single and noone else to worry about.

I think a lot of people see 'single' as meaning 'young and pre-marriage/relationship/children'. I'm single, mid fifties and would rather live alone wrapped in blankets than 'have' to shack up with someone just to pay for nice food. I don't own my house and never will, I can't afford savings, and I work two jobs.

Life isn't just expensive being single, it can be pretty shit too. I have friends who have married to save themselves from the future I am looking at. But hey, there's always the lottery...(qualification, I don't actually do the lottery, but still imagine that I might win it. Maybe single life has turned my brain...)

rainyinnovember. So far all you have managed to observe is that two or more incomes are going to be able to achieve those things better than one.

I was once earning minimum wage in my early twenties. I spent it all on rent, food and alcohol. My free time was spent socialising, playing cards, reading, playing sport and studying.

If your on minimum wage what else do you want from life? It sounds like a good life to me. No one is going to give you more than the minimum just for existing and doing a job thousands of other people could do, you need to be willing to exchange something more valuable than what is easily available if you want more income.

I think you're right about that. Some of those insisting that single people have it made and can do overtime / live in a house share / paaaaaarty seem to be forgetting some single people are going to be over the age of 28!

It sounds like a good life - mm I don't think it does tbh

YANBU

Two wages coming in, but you don't use twice the heat, twice the light or twice the food, even if you do use some more, it's not twice as much.

I have kids, and every bill, every tank of fuel, every grocery shop, every new pair of socks, every birthday present comes from my wage only. Of course it's more expensive.

Sorry if my post read as patronising! Not my intention at all...just saying it isn't always as simple when there's another adult to take into account. I just think extra people often accrue extra costs to the household, and birthdays, and Christmases etc are costs where I've realised a difference.
It's not weird that I've explained things aren't always that simple. I wonder if you'd also say how bizarre it is, if I were to give you examples of families where only one adult was working, and the other was a SAHP, and it was just as hard, if not harder for them than a single person?

I can understand that living with a bankrupt isn't representative of the population, but I'm also not the only person who lives with circumstances of this sort. There are people who end up paying far more than the 50% down the middle of bills that you mentioned...and in all honesty, the bankruptcy isn't really what has meant I lay more than 50% of certain bills.

YANBU

I am single too ... and always skint. Xmas is always worse aswell, presents with one wage instead of being able to share some costs