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AIBU?

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Original poster

AIBU to think that a cashier shouldn't comment on personal items you're buying?

344 replies

catlover1987 · 23/10/2016 10:42

Just home from the weekly shop at Asda. The cashier gave a running commentary on all of my shopping. Oh that looks nice, oh aren't those ready meals handy, oh what is that, I'll need to try that. Mildly annoying but I'm sure she was just trying to be friendly. However, where I think she really crossed the line was when she seen my pregnancy test and said, oh I hope it's a yes! I didn't know what to say!

OP posts:
FranklyMeDeer · 23/10/2016 13:39

Why is it so hard to understand that there are some subjects that the majority of us have no wish to discuss with strangers, and therefore the safest and kindest thing to so would be to not comment if there's a chance that you might upset someone? Yes it's nice to make conversation but most of us have an empathy filter which helps us figure out what's appropriate. Weather? Chicken for tea? Fine. Potential pregnancy of someone you don't know? Not fine.

ChocChocPorridge · 23/10/2016 13:43

I've worked at Asda, we were told we had to talk to customers (and it was brought up in review if we didn't smile enough). My small talk skills really got a workout!

But yes, discussing a customer's shopping isn't the best idea. I generally stuck to the weather and hoped that customers with more shopping would be too busy packing to make much conversation!

Ilovewillow · 23/10/2016 13:45

I think it's lovely when they interact I'd much rather that than mute but YANBU, some items need no conversation!

TheCatsMother99 · 23/10/2016 13:51

I used to work for sainsburys and we were made to talk to customers. I once hsd a gentleman who clearly didn't understand English so I couldn't talk to or have a conversation with him and I was still pulled off my till at the end of my shift and received a bllcking from a manager. So maybe that staff member has just taken that to the extreme. Granted though, they didn't need to comment on your items and especially not personal items.

I'd love to know what they'd have said if you had condoms.

PipandNut · 23/10/2016 13:52

Oh look it's meadows again! This is the third thread I've seen him or her on being really weird

Meadows76 · 23/10/2016 13:56

Oh look it's meadows again! This is the third thread I've seen him or her on being really weird sweet. Just because I have a different opinion Grin

KungFuPandaWorksOut · 23/10/2016 13:56

Im normally not bothered by cashiers and them talking but only once have I been close too want to shout at one!
Me and DH was shopping and bought a pregnancy test, as she was scanning bits she was making the generic comments " oh I love this" etc etc. she scanned the pregnancy test and looked up at us and said
planned or mistake and let out a giggle. She then looked at my DHs face who was gobsmacked and said
by his face im going for mistake. Condoms are on the same aisle you picked this up on you know and waved the test. She then looked at my face, which must have gave away exactly what I was feeling because she said
oops looks like I best shut my mouth now 😡😡😡

gillybeanz · 23/10/2016 14:08

My future dil works at Asda, not tills anymore.
But when she did she also had to make small talk and smile a lot.
I'm sure she said they weren't supposed to get personal though.
So somebody buying a meat pie, they'd comment on something such as "Have you tried these before"? I was wondering what they were like etc.

cashiers do this in Morrisons too, all part of the job.
It's wrong for them to comment on personal and medical items though.

Mintychoc1 · 23/10/2016 14:10

pipandnut I was thinking the exact same thing!

StealthPolarBear · 23/10/2016 14:13

Pandas Shock

StealthPolarBear · 23/10/2016 14:14

Still I'm sure she was just living out side her bubble

surferjet · 23/10/2016 14:16

YANBU - a cashier in sainsburys once said to me, 'I've been here 8 months & this is the first time I've scanned a coconut' - I didn't know whether to feel proud or ashamed.

ElBandito · 23/10/2016 14:21

Usually it's the OP who refuses to back down when told they ABU. Here OP has probably over 95% support and yet there are a couple of posters who just don't get it.

BARB060609 · 23/10/2016 14:25

I am not a fan of cashiers commenting on purchases, I am always polite to them but find it a bit awkward. One time I had bought some pregnacare vitamins, but they were the trying to conceive ones, the young lady on the till obviously thought they were the ones to be taken during pregnancy and said loudly "oooh how far gone are you?" I felt like I must have gone bright red and just said "I'm not yet". I'm glad no one I knew was behind me in the queue! We had been trying for a long time and a comment like that could have really upset someone. For the record I now have a 3 month old baby girl x

Cococrumble · 23/10/2016 14:25

kungfupanda fucking hell! I hope you made a complaint!

FranklyMeDeer · 23/10/2016 14:27

I rather suspect your cashier may have been meadows76 kungfupanda

After all, if she's comfortable discussing it with you, it's completely your problem if you're not, right?

Meadows76 · 23/10/2016 14:28

Usually it's the OP who refuses to back down when told they ABU. Here OP has probably over 95% support and yet there are a couple of posters who just don't get it. I'm not the one who isn't 'getting it' why should I 'back down' ? My opinion is my opinion? I'm not going to change it just because 95% of random posters have a different view, just as I am not expecting said 95% to change their view to mine Confused

VladmirsPoutine · 23/10/2016 14:35

I once bought a pregnancy test and a bottle of vodka, the cashier was Confused

Backingvocals · 23/10/2016 14:35

Fair enough meadows. But you might want to note that almost nobody wants to discuss the state of their womb with a stranger in a passing communication. Just thought you might want to bear that in mind when honing your "topics for suitable for small talk" list Wink

Meadows76 · 23/10/2016 14:36

Don't worry, I don't do small talk, but thanks for the advice

StealthPolarBear · 23/10/2016 14:36

I think meadows has made it clear her opinion is set and she isn't open to changing it. Which is fine, therefore we can continue the conversation bearing that in mind.

Onenerfwarfrombreakdown · 23/10/2016 14:40

Just ignore meadows he/ she loves to play Professional Devils Advocate all over MN and tries to wind everyone up by deliberating go against common sense opinions. Best not feed his/her obvious attempts, which are frankly getting quite tedious by now. Yawn.

CharlieSierra · 23/10/2016 14:42

Seriously, no cashier should pass comment on anyone's purchases but it should be 100% obvious to anyone that this especially applies to personal items. You don't know them, you don't know anything about them, and neither are you entitled to. Their life is none of your business. Smile, be polite, comment on the weather, have enough intelligence to pick up their cues and dont talk at all if they don't appear bothered. Boundaries. Why is this hard?

Backingvocals · 23/10/2016 14:42

Doesn't do small talk yet holds vehement opinions about what is or isn't acceptable small talk.

Ok. I get it.

Owllady · 23/10/2016 14:46

I was a retail manager and its a complete no no to comment on people purchases. Asda dont seem to train their staff very well. That isn't the staffs fault, it's the fault of the management imo. It's not unique to asda obviously, there is poor customer service everywhere and it is management's fault every time imo

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