AIBU to be fuming with this woman? (Re: Adoption)

[BowieFan]

Basically a friend of a friend was on about kids on flights. I said I hated taking DS1 and DS2 on planes when they were little because they hated it, I did and so did everyone else on the plane. The woman said "Oh but you'd feel different if they were your biological kids!"

AIBU to be absolutely fuming about this? I know I should have a thicker skin, but it worries me that there are genuinely people out there who thinks my adopted kids are somehow lesser than hypothetical biological ones

[BowieFan]

Thank you for that shoebedo34 - thankfully our kids know that nasty people are the minority. All of their friends and peers at school know they're adopted and, as far as we're aware, this has never been an issue. For all intents and purposes, we're their parents. We adopted them at birth, so it's not like we are even adopted parents to them - they've never known anybody different.

[kateandme]

sadly i think nthis happens more than it should.i also know a struggling father of two adopted boys who cant get passed certain things or help like he perhaps should/would if they were his 'real' children. I want to shake him!!

[hungryhippo90]

I've not read tft, but I do want to say, there's a woman who kind of took me on as her own (I was older than your kids, as I was 17 when she kind of picked me up and showed me the way)
I had a horrific childhood, really I did, and as I get older. The more I see it.

I was basically left to it at the age of 17, having had a baby myself, and I was tossed out, and I had to make my own way.

She came along, and she showed true care, and compassion for the fact that id never really seen anything other than dysfunction....she's always been there like a mum to me.

Now I'll get to the point. I see her more as a mother because she didn't have to be, but she kind of took me on, and guided me jn the right direction. I love her far more than I probably would have if we were biologically related.... on some level the one person we expect to love us are those biologically related to us, not those who stumble upon us somehow (not saying you stumbled upon yours, I know it's hard to adopt!)

It's a beautiful thing you've done, it's awful she said something like that. Not sure where that line of thinking would have even originated!

Lots of love to your family. Don't let the ignorant upset you. X

[Spottytop1]

I have both adopted and biological children and I can honestly say hand on heart my love for them is exactly the same and unconditional for all. This woman is an idiot!

I also have stepchildren & I do love them - but they have a mum & - Dad so my role is very different.