I'm being very unreasonable but

[Unicorncatsack]

I'm on a Facebook mum's group and people KEEP misspelling "choking" as "chocking". WHY?!?! This spelling mistake doesn't even make sense.

You get a whole post spelled completely correctly and then - "chocking/chocked/chock"

It's giving me the rage.

I am on a lot of forums where English is a second or third language, and have now got used to people who talk about leaving somewhere when they mean they are actually living there, and those who write things like : "it is quiet annoying", when they mean to use "quite".
Still enjoying a gambolling addiction.

Are you jocking?

I knew someone who used to describe his 'gorgeous' girlfriend as... wait for it... 'goreju1c3'. He was a bit of a goth, zombie/horror fan type, so always had to include words like 'gore' and the number 13 in things, y'know, to prove he was genu1n3

goreju1c3 sounds more like something you'd find splattered about following a grisly accident than a compliment.

Josephine Doesn't it just!

Oh, and he usually replaced 'girlfriend' with 'ghoulf13nd', fuck's sake.

I am a pedant. I do not correct other people but I do notice errors.

I joined a group on fb for pedants, and I am really rather proud of the fact that I was castigated on the Pedantry group for being too pedantic. It also made me howl with laughter.

I don't trust autocorrect on my phone, it's shocking. I have written 'defiantly' instead of 'definitely' before. It drives me up the bloody wall!

I think it's because I have chubby fingers, so if I'm a couple of letters out, it will just pick the nearest word regardless of whether is makes sense.

I've never said 'should of, could of etc' You can't blame autocorrect for that one!

it

A few more:

"phase" instead of "faze" - no you're not being clever, you're using the wrong word.

Queue or que instead of cue - again, different words.

Also the rein/reign issue.

And this one did make me smile and groan at the same time - there are a few FB memes doing the rounds at the moment on it - bone apple tea.

And I'd like to introduce Muphry's Law to those that haven't yet heard of it (and no that is NOT a spelling mistake!) - it states that those who comment to correct someone else's grammar/spelling will inevitably make a mistake themselves within that comment.

I think the defiantly instead of definitely thing is all my fellow Glaswegians who pronounce the word deff-inn-ATE- ly so type "definitely" with an a in it and autocorrect kicks in. Pet hate of mine too.

In my experience people with dyslexia or speakers of other languages are SOOO careful when writing English. It's the semi-literate non-dyslexics who write "gawjus" and make all the mistakes listed in this thread.

I don't trust my phobe''s spellchecker at all. It sabotages my posts (see first sentence - it has picked up a habit of replacing apostrophes with double apostrophes - why?) I think it's on drugs or something.

I catch most of them, but some still slip through - usually weirdly combined words which are not part of any version of English at all, but sometimes it does do stuff like quite/quiet when I had it right in the first place, and that's really annoying.

(This post is unedited to make a point. It's mostly behaving at the moment.)

One of my colleagues has English as his third or fourth language. He kept going on about a customer who was annoying him. "He's really buggering me!" I had to explain he meant "bugging me" - and that buggering was something quite different, and it definitely was an error he should avoid, and he should look it up on non-work equipment.

EBear - I love that you have a phobe instead of a phone! (Yes I know, but it's still a lovely DYAC!)

I hate touch screen sometimes. Quite often I have to write the word about four times before it gets the right one. For example, my phone wrote 'sow times' just then instead of sometimes. What is sow times?!

My phone makes me angry!

I have confused my phone further by running Duolingo on it, so now I might get corrected to English, garble, German, French or Welsh. (Except it can't do "w"s with a circumflex like in dwr - water.)

Argh!!! Why!

Every Saturday, my niece posts on Facebook asking if anyone is "taxing". Presumably she means "taxiing" but I always want to comment and say "yes me, give me 20% of your money!"

Dire rear is amazing! Funny because it's true.

Although it is irritating you all need to remember that some of them on fb will be dyslexic and no amount of auto correct will help them recognise the correct spelling if they don't know it. Auto correct is only good if someone recognises it is actually correct! As an English teacher (specialising in teaching people with dyslexia) I find it really, really irritating, but understand the difficulties.

joan

You might want to rtft. This has been covered.

Nothing more annoying than people adding apostrophes to plurals of words just for the hell of it. It's "Fridays are great" NOT "Friday's are great". Argh...

My autocorrect does that. So infuriating!

I get driven to distraction by people not knowing the difference between 'where' and 'were'. yes DP I'm looking at you. And as for people who never use any full stops,commas,capital letters,apostrophes or paragraphs,don't get me started.....