AIBU to feel a little suspicious , FB related .

[Penvelopesnightie]

On my FB I have seen a distant relative of mine and he's in photos taken by he's female partner at a children's party . Him and partner have no children of their own .He is pictured on he's own with the children in every photo . I wonder if I'm being unreasonable to think he's actually quite creepy and why is he in a room without any adults present , just him and he's partner taking photos . Obviously the children's parents have seen these photos on FB and there are no comments made .

Wow.

Should we really be so dismissive of this?

It's hard to describe photos. And he's a relative (i.e. previously known to OP).

Shutting her down and ridiculing her when she's trying to discuss something difficult feels a bit OFF.

No wonder we're still clearing up the debris of 1970s paedophilia.

Its a bit weird if there were no other adults at the party.

I don't understand the problem

I am the only one of my generation in my (large) family with children, we are all adults and my brothers and sisters and cousins will come to parties and spend time with my children, including my brother and male cousins all in their 20s and 30s. What's the problem?

When We had pfb - lots of DH work colleagues were his age or bit younger and mostly male. It was the guys who went nuts for our child wanting to hold and later play.

It wasn't sinister at all - they either had younger siblings, or nieces and nephews they were missing or were really broody and waiting till they had their own - in fact within a few years after when work and housing was sorted they all had their own children

They not much opportunity for 20 and 30 year old males to interact with children - especially young children in our society and it turns out - possible for species survival reasons- they find young babies and kids cute fun as well.

So if the parents are all fine - I don't get why this alone is suspicious

Yes, very suspect.

Is it weird that a man who was invited to a party stands next to other people in the room, despite not being a father?

No, no it's not. How fucking horrible for him that his own family are this suspicious of him simply because he's childless. That makes him 'creepy'?

Is the drip feed that he's a convicted sex pest?

Fair

Manumission I think the issue as Pike said is that the OP started the thread with a very odd post which looked like an innocent man being accused of being suspect. Why then allude to a backstory later instead of mentioning this in at the OP

manu. Your post is sensible and I see your point. However, the OP mentions no previous concerns in her original comment, and refuses to enlighten MN as to why she is worried. So we are left with a post about a childless man photographed with kids at a children's' party and invited to draw our own conclusions. As she refuses to contribute any more 'evidence' of wrongdoing, it all seems rather based in suspicion and negativity, rather than fact.

Jesus.
Is it just childless men that can't have their pics taken with children? Or is it women too?
If it's women then I'd best tell the staff at the nursery I volunteer in that those pics of children doing activities with their key worker and no other adult in shot need to be shredded/deleted immediately

There must be a balance surely, it's not good to be automatically suspicious of a man with a kid in a Facebook photo.

True.

And it's not good to automatically dismiss either,

I'm just wondering; If we could SEE the photos, would we also feel something was unusual about them? Or not?

Alabastard
Come to think of it there used to be a picture in my mom's house of me sat on some childless man's lap. I suppose that was a bit weird. He had a disguise on, what was he hiding?
Oh wait. My mistake. I'm thinking of Father Christmas.

How shockingly negligent of your DM to allow you to sit on that man's knee - it has obviously scarred you for life

Yabu some people men included love playing with kids, I visited an adult male cousin who was on the same level as my 6yr old and off they went and had fun.

You can muse on it if you like but I wouldn't immediate think anything sus about it.

Shutting her down and ridiculing her when she's trying to discuss something difficult feels a bit OFF.

Apparently what she finds off is that a childless man interacted and had normal photos taken with children he knows posted in a clearly visible way taken at an event attended by many other adults who haven't voiced any concerns.

No indication he was alone with the children or that any adults actually at the party had any concerns what so ever.

If she'd been there and felt something was off - that's different but over facebook and with absence of any other information - seem over the top reaction.

".He is pictured on he's own with the children in every photo" does sound potentially a bit strange to me, though, for PARTY photos.

Don't photos taken at parties usually have several people in them? Or at least come in sets of photos that have lots of people in them?

But she doesn't think that they ARE "normal photos" MrsG. She thinks they seem odd.

Maybe they are odd but the explanation is broodiness/infertility. I don't know.

But at least give her a hearing.

Could also be that the camera came out, and the adults legged it out of the room/behind the person taking the pictures. Not because of anything odd, just don't like pictures taken.

OP, can you clarify exactly what's strange about the pictures? Guest at party plus other guests isn't really helping, but unless you're inherently suspicious of all men around children, something must have triggered your thought process.

That's not what I get from it at all Pike

It was five photos all of them on he's own and obviously partner taking photos . I've been mulling it over all day . Perhaps he is sad he can't have children . But it's just weird that they are all of just him and children and no one else enjoying party

It makes sense to me that she finds that a bit unusual.

Have a bit of Scroobius Pip OP

"Thou shalt not think any male over the age of 30 that plays with a child that is not their own is a paedophile. Some people are just nice."