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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To tell my mum she's taking the piss?

234 replies

KungFuPandaWorksOut · 11/10/2016 14:05

I'm a hairdresser who is currently on Mat leave. My mum meets up with her old university friends a couple of times a year and makes a night of it. She asked at the weekend could I do her hair and four of her friends hair for Tonight. I told her no problem but I will charge her friends but not salon price ( I always do my mums for free) she asked me do I know how much it would cost. I told her without exactly knowing what they want doing I wouldn't be able to give a price. She said she thinks majority will have a wash,cut and blow and maybe an updo. I told her call it £15.00 each then if they don't have updo £10. She said that's brilliant.
Now ive just recieved a text off my mum saying how excited her and her girls are to have a "pampering" with me and such a bargain for only £30.
I am so annoyed that my mums pulled this stunt. But now she's told her friends it's £30 collectively so I'm going to look a massive twat saying no it's £15 each if you have an updo!
Would IBU to tell her to piss off Angry
She's due at 3 o'clock and I'm half tempted not too answer the door!!

OP posts:
Original poster
KungFuPandaWorksOut · 12/10/2016 18:34

deadgood meaning ive not long had baby so no baby sitting. (Maybe also because PFB and I don't want too be parted just yet)

OP posts:
Original poster
KungFuPandaWorksOut · 12/10/2016 18:36

mummy I know she won't apologise because she doesn't think she's in the wrong. Granted it's not the biggest crime of the century but it's still warrants an apology her comments, I believe so anyway. Even if she was (maybe when pigs have learnt too fly) to apologise I wouldn't be doing her hair as often as I did. And would start charging for colouring her hair and extensions. Grin

OP posts:
mysistersimone · 12/10/2016 18:37

I have a hairdresser friend who does my hair, she says just to cover the cost of products/dye but I always add £10 on regardless. I wouldn't expect a freebie from any other skilled friend. I don't even babysit for free I swop evenings with friends or other favours. I'm amazed anyone thinks it's OK to do something for free for a decade. I understand if you did your mum's hair as she helped you out and was really grateful and didn't tag mates into the deal. I'm glad your Dad understands

Persistentdonor · 12/10/2016 18:39

OP: I am absolutely flabbergasted!!
I thought my mother was impossible, but yours REALLY takes the biscuit!!
Sad

Original poster
KungFuPandaWorksOut · 12/10/2016 18:45

mysister Originally it was a great arrangement when it began, because it was practise for me so I was eager to do it. It was like having my own personal model 24/7. As times gone on Shes just got use to not paying and had gotten use to the way I styled her hair so didnt want to go anywhere else.

OP posts:
DiddysMammy · 12/10/2016 18:47

My god!!!! She doesn't know she's born!!!! You certainly arent being unreasonable!! Let her go to a bloody salon!!

Ive recently moved and am desperately looking for a salon/stylist as reasonably priced as my last!!!!

Well done for sticking to your guns!

PlumsGalore · 12/10/2016 18:49

Do not feel guilty OP, this is outrageous, I do tonnes for my DD, love her dearly but at the very minimum I would pay her for any products used to do my hair, I would never ever ask her to do my friends' hair.

Good job she isn't training to be a hairdresser!

Mummyoflittledragon · 12/10/2016 18:57

Good I'm glad you're refusing to be bullied. My mother never apologises. Her behaviour is not very nice and diabolical at times. We had a stand off at the beginning of the year. I told her calmly that her nastiness was unacceptable so she shouted and I hung up. 3 weeks later, I called with the express purpose of eliciting an apology. She denied any wrong doing, tried to draw me into all manner of arguments, which I deflected. In the end I calmly said if that was the way she wanted it, there was nothing left to say. I once again cut contact and didn't call. Neither did she. Eventually and finally, I got a card with "I'm sorry if...". That's the best she's ever done. I'm now a lot lower contact and feel better for it. Everything is always all about her.

ImAMoving · 12/10/2016 19:10

Well done for your dad in texting you

londonrach · 12/10/2016 19:13

Well done op. Op dont cut your dm hair again for free!!!

Roversandrhodes · 12/10/2016 19:36

What happened in the end?hope you didn't do it for £30 .Things like this piss me right off ,what's your mums game ,does she not want her daughter getting a fair deal for her work ?

user1471855186 · 12/10/2016 19:43

You are not being unreasonable! I'd book yourself a weekend away, turn up with your baby, drop it off and tell your mum how lovely it is that she is babysitting for free!

Sparklyglitter · 12/10/2016 19:57

Text back and say Mum you are such a comedian - it is 10/15 pounds each depending on what they want.

ChasedByBees · 12/10/2016 20:07

Please stand your ground over your mum's haircuts. Frankly she doesn't value them at all so she needs a bit of a wake up call (in the form of professional salon prices) to make her realise how much you given her over the years. This has probably come about as she mentally now doesn't give a value to what you do.

Ifounddory · 12/10/2016 20:14

What happened in the end?hope you didn't do it for £30 .Things like this piss me right off ,what's your mums game ,does she not want her daughter getting a fair deal for her work?

Short version OP didn't let herself get ripped off. If you rtft you can see all the details.

She'll apologise soon enough when she actually goes into a salon and sees their prices

You should send her in and film it through the window...

Good on you for valuing your time. Stick to it!

whirlygirly · 12/10/2016 20:22

Good god, I would be over the moon if I got a haircut for £15! I'd have squirmed if I were her friend. It doesn't feel good to take advantage of people.

Judydreamsofhorses · 12/10/2016 20:23

This is bonkers - well done for standing your ground, OP. As a comparison, I have a blunt fringe and my hairdresser always tells me to ring in or pop in past for a free fringe trim between cuts, which is the norm in the salon - I always give her £5, even though it takes five minutes, and I pay £60 every six weeks as standard.

DarklyDreamingDexter · 12/10/2016 20:28

It's one thing doing your Mum's hair occasionally as a favour - I'm sure a lot of hairdressers do, but all her friends as well? As you've said, start charging her for things which leave you out of pocket like colour or hair extensions. If she doesn't like it she's welcome to pay the market rate elsewhere. Well done for sticking to your guns.

EweAreHere · 12/10/2016 20:32

Wow. Your mom is an entitled piece of work.

I wouldn't do her hair again if it was me.

I'm glad your dad let you know he also thought she was being ridiculous. I suspect he'll be quite cross with her once he sees how much salons are going to charge her to do her hair. Please please please make her go elsewhere, at least for a while, so she understands not to be so outrageously rude and entitled ever again. And make sure she apologizes first, too, or don't take her back for hair appts.

Thingamajiggy · 12/10/2016 20:40

did you go ahead?

BastardGoDarkly · 12/10/2016 20:43

Holy shit balls! Is she for real?! Chances are they wouldn't have batted an eye at a tenner, she created that mess.

Well bloody done for telling her what's what.

DontMindMe1 · 12/10/2016 21:09

If she won't apologise the just start charging her the going rate....mind remind her that manners don't anything - but bad manners......££££££££ Grin

DontMindMe1 · 12/10/2016 21:09

cost anything

Memoires · 12/10/2016 21:35

Cut and blow dry costs me £30. YANBU at all, your dh and dad are right. Glad they're both sticking up for you.

Cornishclio · 12/10/2016 21:45

Good grief I pay £40 for a cut and blow dry at my salon. Considering you are on maternity leave and presumably money is tighter if you were my DD I would be paying you full rates let alone expecting you to do friends hair for practically nothing. In the future I would certainly hold off doing even your mums hair for free. If she was that bothered about her friend not being able to afford your rates ,which are more than reasonable, then she should have paid herself. She is definitely in the wrong here.