To not have moved on from the referendum result?

[Niamer]

Hi. I am a remoaner. I have bored myself with talking about it online and with a couple of likeminded friends.
I was have never been political, was pretty disengaged before the referendum but a 100% gut-feeling kind of a remainer and really expected the vote to go our way.
Felt devastated at the result; I am a believer in working closely with our neighbours, have lived in other Eu countries, have friends here from other EU countries who feel unwelcome etc etc. AND all the attachment to Europe stuff aside, it just seemed a far safer economic option to stay put. Why go for a bumpy ride when you don't even like where you're going? Also felt really cheated when people's reasons for leaving became clear.
I am amazed that some Remainers have just gone quiet and got weary of it all. As far as Leave voters, there has been plenty of "suck it up" comments and total quiet from others. It hasn't been long but time is not healing for me. In fact the Tory conference seemed to take the grimness up a notch. Still so upset and wanting to protest (and have done in every way that I can think of)
I am currently in groups with staunch Remainers like myself, so I know how they are feeling. Outside of that, it isn't an easy topic to discuss. Remainers, Leavers, non-voters, please could you tell me where you're at? TIA

[Toadinthehole]

I think things will be fine and the pound will eventually recover. The truth is that most countries with similar per capita wealth as the UK aren't in an arrangement like the EU and see no need to be.

Unfortunately, this was going to happen some time as most Europeans don't want to be edged into a sort of Frankenstein federal state. Just as well for the UK that it wasn't any later- and it could have been sooner if politicians had listened to the demands for a referendum some time in the last 20 years since Maastricht.

I just hope the rest of Europe's politicians see sense and don't try to grind on with The Project™. Right now, unfortunately, it seems they are.

[Topseyt]

May is pursuing hard brexit claiming it was the will of the people.

How does she square that one when a significant number of people seemed unable to read the question on their ballot paper. For example, far too many ridiculous xenophobes seemed to think that voting leave meant that they were voting for all Muslims etc. to leave the UK forthwith.

My daughter had friends from many cultures and nationalities when she was at school. Many have suffered racial abuse for the first time in their lives since the referendum even though they were born in the UK and it is their home.

[crossroads3]

Have not accepted it.

May now using referendum as an excuse to behave like the authoritarian racist she had probably always been. Along with Rudd, Hunt and others.

And where is the political opposition to their hard Brexit without a mandate.

"If you are a citizen of the world you are a citizen of nowhere" - is this a normal statement ?

[AppleYumYum]

Remain, so sad about it all and incredulous that welsh people or Cornish people who have received all that EU help and money voted out but then were clambering to say they still wanted the same money from the government after.

I am still in shock and I find it ridiculous that it was sold to the brexiters on lies and fear, many of which unravelled right afterwards and yet that was brushed under the carpet - how can that not result in a re-vote, Boris rolling the dice for his own gain instead of what was best for the country.

The brexiters all had different ideas of what brexit meant, I guess mainly immigration related, now soft and hard brexit has started cropping up, it is so ill defined, it's a mess. I secretly hope someone just says let's call the whole thing off and pretend it was bad dream!

[seekingwisdom4me]

Ok - getting my crystal ball out. I see Deutche Bank imploding then Commerzbank doing the same.Contagion spreading in western banks AGAIN. Ireland thinking "hey lets keep our neutrality rather than fighting Russia" and with Austria saying "lets NOT sign up for CETA & TTIP" and the whole EU thing going down the drain.
The EU will then reform in an associate way (as opposed to a Brussels dictatorship) with a smaller core of countries that retain their sovereignty but co-operate with each other.
Ok, no crystal ball but here is a few relevant links.
www.ft.com/content/9a59f765-b7db-30f3-b0c0-c92a54ad4d37
www.zerohedge.com/news/2016-10-06/russia-warns-us-any-strikes-syrian-army-would-lead-war-our-s-300-s-400-defenses-are-

[winkywinkola]

Purits, there it is again. A "stranglehold" in what way exactly?

And in what way exactly was it affecting you?

[ForalltheSaints]

YANBU.

[kalinkafoxtrot45]

YANBU. I am disgusted by the result and by the tone that politics has taken since.

[NiceCuppaTeaAndASitDown]

For people who say leavers would have been over losing the vote by now, that's because there would have been no change!
What about all the grants and funding that will now stop?
I know lawyers, librarians, scientific researchers, all of whom have been told contracts won't be renewed. While people are still worried about how they will survive and their day to day life, they aren't going to 'stop moaning' any time soon.

[Neverknowingly]

When Leavers make posts like Purits', is it any wonder that the intelligence and knowledge levels of some of the Leave voters are questioned by the Remainers?

[PigletWasPoohsFriend]

For people who say leavers would have been over losing the vote by now, that's because there would have been no change!

As I've said, I was for remain and no, there would have been no immediate change, but what about in 5 years time, for example?

No one has a crystal ball.

[MirabelleTree]

DH and I were talking about this earlier as we're steeling ourselves for a visit from his Brexit voting family this weekend and both dreading it. My Mum died the month of the referendum and I have adjusted to her death much better than the referendum result. I'm grateful she is dead as she was incredibly Ill for a long time and her suffering is over. But now there's the aspect that she didn't have UK nationality so at least there are no complications from that and the same for my deceased PIL who were living in Europe when they died. I've found myself being grateful for the fact all three are dead and no complications from Brecit regarding them, that makes me feel a bit sick I feel that way.

DD is currently living in the EU but was hoping to return with her EU partner next year and long term they were keen to make the UK their home. Obviously we don't now know how much of a possibility this will for him.

DS is one of our future scientists and I have watched in horror at the massive damage this has already done to this sector. I'm starting the process of shoring up by dual nationality so the DC can still have EU passports and we're considering whether long term we're better off joining family Europe where we could at least all live in the same extension.

Planning permission for an extension came through just before the referendum. We were going to extend so we had space to accommodate DD and partner and have a builder lined up plus funds now available. But we're not now sure if it make sense to start as we don't know what lies ahead for our family.

Relationships are a little strained with my Dad as he is gradually realising how the result has affected us and I think he is feeling quite sad about it and often just doesn't know what to say.

Have I moved - no I bloody haven't. I thought I was making progress then this week has really kicked it all off again.

[jessica29054]

I think this is the issue. I don't feel strongly about brexit but I did vote to leave.

I understand people's feelings of sadness and feelings of losing links with wider Europe, especially those on the south coast.

However, it's also infuriating being repeatedly told you voted in the way you did because of a bus and / or being racist.

And when people say 'oh well, I don't mean everyone, but most people ...' well, no people vote for all kinds of reasons that you cannot know.

I'm sorry you're upset about it still OP.

[NiceCuppaTeaAndASitDown]

Perhaps 'no immediate change' would have been more fair.

[PNGirl]

"I've heard some absolutely ridiculous justifications for voting leave

Tbf whilst campaigning I heard some pretty ridiculous justifications for voting remain."

As ridiculous as my example? I doubt it. There is not agreeing with someone's reasoning and there is listening to stuff they have made up in their own heads a la the "Why are you still here, we got are (sic) country back so brown people have to leave." brigade. I can't believe that their voice was legitimised and they now feel there is safety in numbers. The mind boggles.

[AnchorDownDeepBreath]

I think, sadly, this may well become the way of the world. Trump may win in America with similar policies, France want their own referendum, there's rumours that Austria and Germany will follow suit. The parties like UKIP who seem to base their policies on reinstating former glory and closing the country are doing much better everywhere. Immigrants are largely being presented as a security risk that could and should be stopped.

I work in an industry that was supposed to be hit hard but thankfully, despite the headlines, is doing much better than expected. A lot of my European colleagues were very upset by the result and started marching and protesting immediately, and are now moving abroad. They feel unwanted, overall, and betrayed. I can't say I blame them, although I am wondering where they'll go. There seem to be few places that aren't at risk of this themselves.

[PigletWasPoohsFriend]

As ridiculous as my example? I doubt it.

Yes as ridiculous as yours.

I didn't want to leave, however the idea that all leavers are of lower intelligence or that everything that the remain campaign said was completely true is wrong.

There is some sort of unhealthy superiority and snobbery peddled by some Remain voters towards leave voters.

[PNGirl]

Oh and believing that leaving the EU will mean we don't have to take non-EU refugees, sorry, "migrants". There's that one too.

[TheNaze73]

I've learnt to accept the result however, I do think we're truly fucked as a country.
No idea who voted out however, it wasn't representative of London & the SE, who when you see the voting map were by & large remain.

[crossroads3]

I'm sorry you're upset about it still OP.

I don't understand how anyone who has witnessed what came out of the Tory conference, could not be upset.

[TadlowDogIncident]

I'm not over it. I'm grieving. I can't leave: this is the only home I have, and I can't uproot my husband and son, but I don't want to be here any more and I don't like the country we're becoming. Half my boy's classmates have parents from another EU country: the school playground the morning after the vote felt like a funeral.

[Niamer]

Thank you all again, leavers and remainers. Of course this is a tiny snapshot of how a handful of people are feeling, but I wanted a reality check.

Unless this is just a bad dream, we are in dangerous waters. The result of the referendum was one thing, but the way it has been interpreted by TM and her crew as a vote against immigration from the WHOLE country is terrifying and madness. We have heard very little from Corbyn on the EU, but I do agree with him that the Tory conference served to fan the flames of xenophobia. Just when they were in desperate need of extinguishing.

Those of us who grew up knowing an open and tolerant country and wanting more of that please, we are now the unpatriotic Liberal elite! No I am just an ordinary reasonable person who wants my country back.

I am quite lazy and quite quiet, not one to make a fuss. But I have come to realise, there is no one here who is going to make a fuss for me. Can I urge anyone feeling as I do at the moment to say something, do something, if you are not already. It may be hopeless, but I feel there is too much to lose to not fight it. I may well be teaching Grandmother to suck eggs, but there is the 48% group on FB for remainers, non-voters and leave regretters. Not all of us feel comfortable being political online. It is very easy to create a second FB account using a middle name, nickname whatever from a new email account, so you can say how you are feeling without all your friends, colleagues knowing what you're up to.
There will be more March for Europe events coming up. I dragged myself to the first one just because I felt I had to, but expecting to hate it. It was FAB! Never expected to love it so much. Was able to shout chant and sing all my frustrations away in lovely company, feeling very safe with hoards of police there smiling on. Obviously there is nothing to stop me walking down my local high street singing with an EU flag, but I haven't quite reached that point yet! Please consider attending a demo. We are all busy, many of us not comfortable with that sort of thing, but honestly it is such a good day out!

[ThoraGruntwhistle]

Agree entirely with Maudlin's post about austerity.
I'm sure it is pathetic and ridiculous of me but I'm still finding it quite hard to speak to a couple of people I know who voted Leave because of 'all the Polish people.' Oh well, as long as you examined all the arguments and voted with what you thought was best for the country...
I found the result of the referendum really upsetting, and the disgusting things said at the Tory party conference (because xenophobic new policies are now what they think the working classes want to hear) makes me feel very afraid for the future. It is hard to get over, and people just going 'you lost, stop sulking' is absolutely unhelpful.

[PigletWasPoohsFriend]

No idea who voted out however, it wasn't representative of London & the SE, who when you see the voting map were by & large remain.



The UK is a heck of a lot bigger than SE and London!

[EmilyAlice]

Yes, still struggling to get over it, not helped by the fact that as British pensioners we have so far lost 16% of our income (and just to counter the popular view of "ex-pat" pensioners, we speak the language, play a full part in the life of our entirely French village, pay taxes and do not have our health cover paid for by France).
We are hugely worried for the future and very concerned about the negative impact of the result on our children and grandchildren.
I feel furious that our family and millions of others will be denied freedom of movement by people who clearly don't give a toss about it.