to think DH should be able to keep vauge track of what our kids do?

[seminakedinsomebodyelsesroom]

Ok, first off, I know this isn't up there with the worst things that could happen, but...

Today DH and I are both working from home. On Tuesdays DC are collected from school/looked after by DM - as has been the case for about 3 years. They finish school at 2:55 and 3:05. At 3:15 DH asks me if I'm ok to pick up the kids today.

Admittedly youngest DC has just started school and I've recently slightly changed my working pattern, so there are some new routines to get used to, but still AIBU to find this apparent lack of awareness quite annoying?

My DH cannot seem to retain basic information relating to our children/timings etc. It drives me to distraction. I think part of it is laziness tbh as we have a shared calendar which we run our lives to and rather than check this on his phone, he'll ask me what time their swimming lessons are (for example).

I dunno why it bothers me. I feel a bit like he thinks it's not very important and he doesn't need to remember or he doesn't care enough to remember. I'm sure neither are true. Just feels that way.

We solved this problem early on by putting everything into our iPhone calendars. We can both see
all of each other's activities and the children's at a glance. Reminders are set too so they pop up as necessary on both phones.

Men know we are so super efficient that they are just a back up plan for when something goes wrong with our sheer perfectness! (ob a minor glitch now and again is acceptable)
Men can't forward think or plan (flaw)
My dh went to the shop on the way to collect dd from gymnastics and ds from boxing (same buying and same time) came back with a 4 pint bottle of milk.

And no dc.
We live 5 min drive and his fish memory let him down
AGAIN

Stop using DD and DC, speak fucking English

And lo, behold the vast expanse of the internets, stretching as far as the eye can see, myriad in its variety. Fuck off somewhere that doesn't use that convention.

I'm not sure really.

DH and I share 'remembering'. He remembers car servicing, garden waste week and stuff like that. I remember the children's routines. It is a waste of energy for us both to remember everything.

( Jessica DD and DC is standard on MN. Don't be so rude ).

Jessica you must be new Bless.

My Dh is like this and it drives me nuts now he has college days and shifts to remember it didn't change over the years I'm fed up of remembering stuff 21 years of him shrugging and saying I forgot has me teetering on the edge

Jessica it might be considered appropriate to lurk for a bit on a new community site in order to see what that site's own conventions are.

Thank you.

Teen and tween that is a fair point he remembers other stuff I guess it balance s out

Jessica is this your first time on an Internet forum? Abbreviations of commonly used terms is very much the norm. How rude (and ignorant) of you to try and call the OP (Original Poster) out in such a way!!

OP I have to tell DH about 17 times anything that I want him to be aware of, infuriating but true! :)

DH and I share 'remembering'. He remembers car servicing, garden waste week and stuff like that. I remember the children's routines. It is a waste of energy for us both to remember everything.

I agree with this.

My problem is that DH doesn't appear to do the "remembering" about anything. Except that we need to order more wine or that he wants to buy the ingredients for a particular meal at the weekend. Anything not related to work or his stomach doesn't warrant using up his precious headspace.

OP, does your DH remember other family/house related stuff, that you are not responsible for? If so then YABU. If your DH doesn't remember anything house/family related then YANBU.

Ignore the troll everyone.

My DH was always crap at remembering when our DDs went to anything. That was my domain. He is excellent at remembering stuff like insurance/bill paying/putting bins out etc. That is his domain. Like another OP said, we tend to share the remembering.

Jessica
www.mumsnet.com/info/acronyms

YABU - but having said that I do get where you are coming from. It depends on whether your DH is pretty good and fair generally. If he is, then don't sweat the small stuff.

My DP is pretty good and fair generally, but doens't remember a single thing I have to text him everything. He just compartmentalises.

"DH and I share 'remembering'. He remembers car servicing, garden waste week and stuff like that. I remember the children's routines. It is a waste of energy for us both to remember everything"

So he remembers things that happen annually, or once a month. You remember things that happen every day.

A bit like people who share the housework where one cooks dinner, washes up,does the washing and ironing, cleans the house and does the packed lunches while the other mows the lawn, does the oil in the car and puts up shelves......................

Jessica FOTFOSM

Oh! We've got a new nutter!
Wonder how long this one will be with us.

OP YANBU.

Jessica are you "okay"?.

Op, my DH never remember's anything about who should be where at what time.

It's pretty annoying.