to think you don't text people when you'd expect them to be asleep?

[bibbitybobbityyhat]

I have terrible insomnia and have been awake since 3am . I was actually just drifting back to sleep at 5am when I received a text from a friend!! So that's me woken up for the day. I can't think why you would do that?

This is so selfish.. not everyone has a fancy phone that allows certain calls but not others. I wish people would stop it. Funnily enough, those that do it to me are people I know not friends and are selfish in real life too. Bastards.

"Um, why not just have your phone so it doesn't make a noise when you get a text? "

Why should she???

"It is unrealistic to expect everyone on your contact list to know when it is convenient for them to contact you"

Don't be stupid. It's well known that 3am is anti-social.

Oh FGS

You can't police when people try and contact you, but you can police when you want to be contacted.

Simple.

Having your phone by your bed, looking at it before you try to go to sleep is probably why you've got insomnia in the first place. Phones don't belong in bedrooms.

YANBU.

I take my phone to bed incase anyone needs to contact me in an emergency. The downside is that even when it's on silent, the vibration of a text wakes me up and I don't know how to disable it

I never text someone in the middle of the night if I'm awake. It's no trouble to just send a message when most people are up, or draft a reply but not send it until a reasonable time.

Was I've said a couple of times, I haven't got a problem with mid night texts but clearly others do. Just tell your mates don't send texts at tht time if you can't cope with them.

It's the automated ones that's a pain in the ass though!

I think it's hugely unreasonable.

DH has just had one phone call and two texts from work which has woken me and the DCs up. He is on annual leave.

His phone is on because both his grandparents are seriously ill in hospital.

I don't think it's too much to ask for people to put their brain in gear and have a bit of consideration for others. You don't know the immediate circumstances of the person you're texting/calling.

A one-off, in an emergency, I could understand but this is a regular occurance for us, despite his colleagues being told. It's just selfish.

DH has just had one phone call and two texts from work which has woken me and the DCs up. He is on annual leave.

That is definitely unreasonable.

I often holiday in places with a very bad mb signal.

The thing is, he's actually supposed to be away supporting primary school kids in an activities weekend (he doesn't work in a school but does have a volunteer supporting role). He's not actually gone for other reasons but work don't know this.

So they've rung/text knowing that; his grandparents are ill, he would be going to bed/getting up very early, he'd be sharing a room with another member of staff, he's on a/l so they shouldn't be contacting him anyway.

All because they couldn't find something which, lo and behold, turned up five minutes later. This is not the first time either. Needless to say, I sent a shitty message back, as me, which I hope will give them cause for forethought next time.

Unless it's an emergency I really don't see how texts can't wait until a reasonable hour. And now I know I'm going to be wide awake for most of the night (light sleeper, DH snoring his head off, oblivious).

And this is one of the reasons we still have a landline.

Sometimes being a bit of a dinosaur isn't a bad thing.

And this is one of the reasons we still have a landline

Over the last few years I have found the landline to be a big pain in the ass and the best thing I did all last year was to get shut of it.
Life is much better without it!

The number of people who can't use their phones is shocking. Even my Indian mil who can't read/write in any language knows how to turn her phones to mute. You don't need a 'fancy phone' (she has the first model Nokia and silent mode works just fine).

So many selfish folk - "if I want to text you I will because I want to. It's up to you to stop me."

Get some self-awareness people.

Lostincumbria - your phone, you put it on mute. Don't police others.

Lostincumbria - your phone, you put it on mute. Don't police others
Exactly!
As I've stated its not normally people tht text me late it's automated services.

I have mine on silent over night but DH has to have his mobile switched on as it is linked to an anti theft device / movement detector and also a low battery indicator on his works van.

If it's a time when I wouldn't ring someone, I wouldn't text either. I won't always remember to put my phone on silent and I wouldn't expect that any recipient of potential 5am ramblings would either.

I think it's odd that the onus is on the recipient to make themselves available or otherwise during what are generally considered antisocial hours. That said, it might be hours before I notice a text or a missed call anyway. I don't always answer my land line when it rings either. I hate being expected to be permanently available and tend towards being a hermit.

Maybe I'm just getting old.

Put your phone on silent when you need to sleep or don't want to be disturbed

"Put your phone on silent when you need to sleep or don't want to be disturbed"

No! Why should OP do this. People shouldn't text at stupid times, that's all.

How thoughtful of User1471464238 to come on to a thread with 270 messages and suggest something that cannot possibly have been suggested before!

@ user1471464238 issuing orders

I don't unplug my landline at night as people won't ring unless it's an emergency. I wouldn't expect non urgent contact between, say, 10pm and 7am, on my phone either. It wouldn't occur to me to put my phone on silent just because someone considers 5am a good time to discuss the Kardashians or what to put in a pie for tea. The silent mode is used when I go into a meeting and I think there's a chance that I might dingle at an inappropriate moment. If I got a text at 5am from a friend I'd think it was because something had happened that they needed help with or a friendly ear - if someone needed emergency childcare or was upset about something I'd yawn and deal with it. Anything else is just rude.

What's so weird about thinking that people should respect antisocial hours?

I agree with the OP, I keep my phone on in case of emergency and it really annoys me when people text at say 2am, people who know I am up at 6am for work.

Luckily I have an iPhone and people have pointed out the feature to me that only allows calls/texts from certain numbers through at certain hours so I have that activated. Only problem there is what if a friend of my mum phoned for example, I don't have all their numbers, and as previous posts have mentioned everyone should know that 3am is antisocial x

I sympathise. I don't have the facility on my phone, to have different contacts set up in different ways. I take my phone to bed, because I have elderly parents and "children" that have only recently gone to Uni. My clients text me as early as 6am and as late as 11pm. It's very annoying!

No I don't think it is unreasonable at all, to all that say learn how to use your phone can I also say why text at all during the night if it is not urgent? people are entitled to time to switch off from the busyness of their lives and I don't think it it polite to disturb someone before & am with non urgent cha. Why not politely make your feelings known to your friend as Im sure if she has any respect for you it will not happen again xxx

ahem* that should read 7am!