I don't think I should cook every night

[LurkyLurkerMcLurkface]

I'm on maternity leave at the moment with 8 month DS. DH works full time and is out of the house 8am-6pm. Our evening routine is pretty set, he gets in and takes DS, I get food ready for DS. He'll then sit with DS while he eats. He then does books/bath and I do final feed and settle. I then come down and cook
Every. Fucking. Night
Last night I'd had enough and cooked for myself and left him to it. He's been sulking since.
AIBU to think this should be a shared job?

It varies, I grant you - but no matter how senior you are, there's usually someone (clients, customers, Board) to answer to. Jobs differ, though - I agree....and sometimes small kids have very strong opinions on your performance!!

euromorris It does get better (I definitely found it did, anyway!). The baby stage can be incredibly tough. Friend of mine had a baby like you describe - she's a really quiet little girl now!

There is always someone to answer to but in many jobs e.g. mine they are only interested in the end result and on a day to day basis I can organise what I do and when I do it. I have a lot more autonomy than I did on maternity leave and it will be similar for many other people.

If one more person tells me 'they sleep all the time at this age!', I'm going to punch them in the face. She's 12 weeks old and has barely slept during the day since she was 4 weeks old.

The saving grace was that she slept well at night, but leap 3 has spoilt that somewhat. Every. Bloody. Hour last night.

Am now dreading the 4 month sleep regression....

I have four kiddies with me all day, however, those first few months with one baby is bloody exhausting, that said, slow cookers are the way to go! I have two (at Asda atm they are selling em half price too! about £7!!) I make mince in one of them, and do a stew in another, make loads, and it gets bagged ready for the next day. It took me a long while to get organised, but now we're sorted...just! x

euromorris have you got a sling? That was how I got stuff done with a similar baby.

CBeebies is your friend!

Like the advert "if u don't ask u don't get". My DH did no cooking for 10yrs until I told him about my colleague's fabulous husband who made her breakfast, packed lunch & shared the cooking. Now DH is a better cook than me & cooks whenever we have guests & dinner parties with over 20 guests. When I was pregnant with baby no2 we had takeaway once a week which we still do now. Cooking every day/other day gets so boring.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

1. Two adults? So always cook as for a dinner party for six. Plate up and freeze. (2 nights not to worry about already)
2. Send him out with a tenner for fish and chips in your sexy nightie waving a bottle of champagne seductively. (Lazy day!)
3. BEANS. Soak a cup overnight, fry onion, garlic, fresh chillie, they freeze well, turmeric, paprika, cayene pepper, bring to an amazing aroma, then add the hydrated beans in with potato and eight tomatoes, fresh rosemary, bay, sage, and boil for 50 minutes.Separate the potato, tomato and a little jus, mash into a volcanic colour, then add the other ingredients, then season with salt to your taste.

This is amazing. One cup of beans with the above recipe will give you eight meals. You portion it and then you can either eat alone with a flourish of fresh salad or add anchovies.

The trick is always have a simple appetiser, even if if it is just crisps with a dip, present it well as in a posh restaurant and don't talk to him until he has calmed down after a hard day at work.

Then present him with a lovely main, as described above. The beans are amazing, a day's work the above, a month's meals if you serve and present cleverly.

I hope this helps.

Every Good Wish!

I went to a sling library on Monday for that reason but can't find one she will tolerate. She hates facing inwards, tummy time etc, so screamed blue murder with every sling I tried. She's too young for an outward facing one. I was gutted! :'(

don't talk to him until he has calmed down after a hard day at work

Hey SherbrookeFosterer the 1950's have called, they want their opinions back.

'The trick is always have a simple appetiser, even if if it is just crisps with a dip, present it well as in a posh restaurant and don't talk to him until he has calmed down after a hard day at work.'

Er, no. That isn't the trick.

Then smile as you serve and he will be putty in your hands!

A bit like the putty between your ears...

Say what you like. It still works!

So do slaves, but some of us are slightly more enlightened.

Don't listen to the hecklers, listen to me and take a leap of faith.

You won't regret it!

"Send him out with a tenner for fish and chips in your sexy nightie waving a bottle of champagne seductively. (Lazy day!)"

This is sarcasm, yes?

You won't regret it!

Given the op appears to be an intelligent woman, rather than a bridge dweller, she won't regret it as she won't try it. Anyone with half a brain doesn't need to prostitute themselves for fish and chips.

A day's work, a month's meals!

Um no thanks sherbrooke, he has a baby shoved at him. Sometimes with the added bonus of needing a nappy change while I go and rock in a corner.

Well if it's so simple, I'm sure OPs DH will enjoy cooking his beans.

You have my sympathy, my first was very clingy (don't like that word but it will do). I used to strap her to my back and cook ái couldn't put her down. Probably did this till she was 2. It made me feel like a failure, but is a phase, and it will get the cooking done during the day. Your DP can pull his find out too.
YANBU x

no, OP's DH is going to give her a tenner for the chippy and wave her off in his sexy boxers, surely?

I wonder whether DH will go and buy me a Snickers if I go downstairs in my pants and wave a pound coin at him.