Longlist 10, I'm extremely aware of CP issues, hence I ask open questions and definitely relating to direct members of any of their family.. I'm not 'interviewing' these children. I'm just showing general interest in them and what sort of things they enjoy. What's the harm with that?
I don't expect my techniques for class control to suit every teacher, but it works for me.
I don't and have never had any parent complaining about the way I handle my classes; quite the opposite. I keep all of the parents updated and I'm on friendly terms with them. I've made it clear my door is always open. If there is a misunderstanding I've always managed to deal with it amicably, but I don't hold the golden touch. I'm not claiming that.
As for the "poor, poor teacher and that she'd been told that she was to butter me up" is a completely ridiculous comment. She wasn't. She wasn't made to feel "humiliated and grinding her teeth, whilst smiling on the outside either". There's such a word called diplomacy. She hadn't been told to "butter me up" becUse the head told me to deal with her directly, which I did. There was no communication between them in the meantime. I'm 100% sure. The teacher wasn't "humiliated and grinding her teeth behind a diplomatic smile", because I wasn't only talking to her, out of earshot of any other members of staff. Her body language was actually very relaxed, as we'd already built a good repoire. I wasn't going in on the attack mode whatsoever. That's not my style. There was no diplomatic smile. She just simply acknowledged that she hadn't thought about the bigger picture or could think of alternative ways of dealing with a couple of children who were sloshing their sticky drinks around that they'd been allowed to out upon their desks. She just couldn't see the woods for the trees. That's all.
There was definitely no animosity between us following that conversation whatsoever. We were definitely had an amicable relationship.
Longlist10, I feel that you've read my message totally out of context. I'm not assuming that I have all the answers. As teachers we often talk in the staff room about using different approaches to different children and behavioural issues, because each child is a unique individual. Even with my own children I know what's most effective if I want to make a point. Your messages sound extremely aggressive and that you've read my message and basically decided for whatever reason to take out whatever frustrations you have upon me and make quite a number of assumptions and comments that are totally untrue and not what I've said. I'm just stating what works for me; that's all, not any other teachers. It's not the golden key to all situations, and I've never claimed that any of my stances or approaches to problems are. I treat my children as individuals who are all unique by chatting to them and getting to know their characters, which is important, I feel. I don't do this behind closed doors either. I do this with other teacher who also sit with their.pupils. Lunchtime is all about learning the art of communication with others and table manners. For instance, not picking go their noses at the table. But again, rather than embarrassing the child in front of their peers, I get up and have a gentle word with the child that they ought to go and wash their hands discreetly. We can see them all the time from where we sit, as can the school secretary..Yes, the child may mention mum is disabled or any other difficulties they face at home. I can then take those into account when talking to the child, choosing reading books and being particularly sensitive towards that child's needs..I stay in contact with all parents and my door is always open. If am concerned about a child's behaviour or pleased with their behaviour, I make a point of contacting all the parents. Parents like to be kept informed, whatever, and so they should be. I never finish my day at 3.05pm. I'm often there much later. I wonder much of my holidays considering how and what I can teach better and how I can make it more interesting. I even do that instead of counting sheep at night.
I've never actually had any parental issues/problems, ever. I know that many parents regard me as quiet, gentle and easy to approach. Even in a supermarket! But I don't mind!
So no, basically, I'm me; not a golden panacea to every other teachers problems or issues. And I'm most definitely don't consider myself as perfect. I just really enjoy my job and care for the children that I work with deeply.
You've read me totally wrong Longlist10 and it seems you have an angry hornets nest underneath the bonnet upon your head. It seems you have a different agenda here and have decided to take it out upon myself. I kindly suggest that you get off your high horse.