Trouble is, there are a lot of people who do mind a confident young woman Freddie. People who are very happy to criticise, attack, take down a peg or two...just if they see someone who is happy in themselves.
So the confident girl learns to dissimulate a little, because it's more socially acceptable than just being confident and proud...
Oh wait, there are people waiting to attack and criticise there too
Basically, as a young woman, seems someone is always out to get you, one way or another.
See, I just don't get this. I recognise what you're saying, it rings true with a number of women (and it is women) that I know, and in my 30s as an able woman hitting her stride professionally I suffered my fair share at the hands of the mediocre middle aged man.
But what I don't get is that if you're confident in your abilities / looks / whatever, then by definition you shouldn't care what people think. That's what it means to be confident.
I always think it must be so so hard to be both capable and insecure at the same time, insecure to the point of needing validation or caring what people think (not insecure leading to self-sabotage, which although also a deep shame, at least makes sense to me because you're not relying on something outside your control). Why expend so much energy paying any heed to people who are trying to pull you down a peg or two? At a push I understand when it's a relationship with someone important, like a parent. But outside of that...why? Can't the person see the people criticising them for what they are?
Interestingly, Rav is (imho) a pretty mediocre baker and he knows it. He's said more than once that the only reason he's still in the game is because there have been worse performances so far. I get it, makes sense to me. There's no drama about it.
The redhead engineer type (forget his name) is also riddled with insecurity and tries very hard, but also (I think) is ultimately confident in his abilities. But he doesn't seem to seek validation from others. He seems to want to satisfy himself, meet his own standards. This makes him (and his type, while we're in the business of projecting into RL) a far easier and more appealing person to be around. There are no demands being placed on third parties, no confusion about what he can/can't handle, whether you can/can't comment on this or that, while being at the receiving end of some fairly risqué (in the context of baking!) commentary.
I don't want to turn this into an "all women blah blah blah" and "all men blah blah blah". But these are traits that I've noticed time and time again in women and a certain kind of woman. It's just so frustrating. It should all be a total non-point: Candice is an excellent baker and that's all there should be to it! Why complicate it?