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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think it's horse shit when people say they don't need to drive

257 replies

pleasemothermay1 · 15/09/2016 19:48

Until you need to meet up anywhere that's not on there doorstep that is

I well annoyed supposed to be meeting my friend who always says she dosent need to drive as she gets about fine

However trying to meet at at 12.45 to go swimming and the pool is to far for her to get there and back for the school run if she drove it would be a 15 minute drive I then suggested soft play near her house howeve the bus dosent run there is on a industrial estate And she would have to walk 35 minutes before she even got to the bus stop gurr

It's the same every time even if we're meeting up with out the kids in the evening unless she able to get a lift then she can't come

Out so you don't need to drive unless the place is not on yur frigging door step gurr rant over I can understand if you live in London but we live in the sticks

OP posts:
claraschu · 16/09/2016 07:56

If everyone on the planet starts and keeps driving around, it will become uninhabitable that much sooner. There are far too many cars and far too much car exhaust in this country already.

I am very grateful to people who don't drive, and never begrudge them a ride

stitchglitched · 16/09/2016 08:00

I don't drive, I took lessons about 15 years ago and failed a couple of tests as I suffer from anxiety and got myself in a state. I haven't bothered since. DP isn't allowed to drive for medical reasons.

It isn't an issue, we live on the outskirts of a city and have 6 buses an hour from the end of our road that takes us right into the city centre. DP gets the bus to work, we get shopping delivered and use taxis if needed. We walk everywhere, and the DC are used to it and better at doing so than many friends and relatives who are used to being driven everywhere. We may get the occasional lift from family such as dsis lives nearby and she we sometimes go food shopping together. She will give me a lift home but in return I help her with her bags and unpack her heavy stuff etc for her as she has a disability and struggles. I've never been to Ikea in my life and have never had any desire to.

Original poster
pleasemothermay1 · 16/09/2016 08:00

poster Bishybishybarnabee Fri 16-Sep-16 07:41:18

I was almost 2 years in a manual I passed after 4 months in a automatic never looked back try auto I no Somone people are a bit funny about them I never had a issue buying a car and your be driving with in a few months

OP posts:
morningpaper · 16/09/2016 08:00

Having done some shifts with district nurses recently, I can safely say that you NEED TO LEARN TO DRIVE. So many elderly women looking after their spouses and unable to leave the house because they can't drive. Desperately sad.

LRDtheFeministDragon · 16/09/2016 08:03

morning, forgive me, but that doesn't mean you need to learn to drive. I agree it's very useful, but there are plenty of people who are not equipped to learn to drive, or whose capacities become such that they're no longer safe to do it. What is actually needed is better support for elderly carers across the board.

Togaparties · 16/09/2016 08:03

There are far too many cars and far too much car exhaust in this country already.

ODFOD Biscuit

MewlingQuim · 16/09/2016 08:06

It's very rude to describe non-drivers as ridiculous. People may not be drivers for a variety of reasons, some by choice some not.

I have a cousin and a colleague with epilepsy, both have frequent seizures and cannot have a license at all. My brother has epilepsy but it is well controlled by medication and he held a license for many years but lost it after a seizure at work.

DBIL is partially sighted and cannot hold a license, although he can see well enough to ride a bike.

There are plenty of medical conditions that exclude people from driving. Or maybe your friend just doesn't like it or just can't afford it. I didn't drive for 10 years because my old car died and I couldn't afford another, then just got used walking and cycling everywhere. Cars, tax, mot, insurance all add up to a lot of money.

GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER · 16/09/2016 08:06

Friend of a friend had six kids, but invariably looked serene and relaxed.

I wondered how on earth she managed it, until the mutual friend said, 'She doesn't drive. It's the rest of us who ferry all her kids about. While we're going demented back and forth in the after-school traffic, she's sitting at home with a glass of wine.'
She added, 'She's the clever one - we're the mugs.'

Should probably add that the mother of six was quite well off and doubtless help in the house added to her air of serenity.

MagikarpetRide · 16/09/2016 08:07

Well said LRD

Original poster
pleasemothermay1 · 16/09/2016 08:08

morningpaper Fri 16-Sep-16 08:00:46

this my friend lives in Woking her nan relied heavily on her husband to drive her around he died about 4 years ago she is near enough house bound only able to go out if Somone can collect her the buses out of London are expesive she has to get her meat from the butcher it's almost twice the price of just pooping into supermarket and if she dose go she has to factor in cab there and back in her weekly budget

I just think about days like today when it's pouring with rain I have two children and it would take and hour to walk to the tesco in my car it will take 10 minutes

I need too get two things I wouldn't be walking a hour to get them

OP posts:
mollie123 · 16/09/2016 08:10

morning
So many elderly women looking after their spouses and unable to leave the house because they can't drive.
BUT I thought the latest idea on MN is that no-one over 60 should drive as they are incompetent - much good a licence to drive aquired by them would be then. Hmm

LineyReborn · 16/09/2016 08:10

There are far too many cars and far too much car exhaust in this country already.

It's becoming true where I live. Crappy air quality, no parking spaces, congestion and gridlock, 'Mexican stand offs' to the point where the police have been called, and a general feeling of too many cars in too little road space.

And the solution isn't to build bigger roads on green space. Well, I don't want that future, anyway.

CatNip2 · 16/09/2016 08:11

Where I live in suburbia it's cheaper to get a taxi than a bus. Although I do drive, some of DD's friends came from families with no car and used taxis lots. 2.50 from the far side side of town to the other far side. Everywhere else in between they walked. I never even knew taxis were so cheap here until my DC were teenagers and started getting them everywhere including home from school, I then found out it was so much cheaper for four of them to share a taxi than getting the bus!

Atenco · 16/09/2016 08:11

I think it is really sad that so many people are wedded to their cars and some many others are forced into owning cars because of poor public transport. Air pollution is biggest killer and yet people are saying that if you have kids you should have car.

claraschu · 16/09/2016 08:13

Togaparties why should I fuck off?
Do you think we need more traffic jams, more pollution, and more road work?

I think people who go to a bit of inconvenience to keep cars off the streets are doing us all a favour. I have friends who bike and take busses everywhere, and I think what they are doing is great, so I am glad to go out of my way to give them a ride occasionally.

LineyReborn · 16/09/2016 08:15

Tesco deliver to doorsteps, OP. Relatives can arrange this if the older person isn't online.

Although I would have thought that being online was more important than having a car these days. My dad was online long after he had to stop driving for medical reasons.

toomuchtooold · 16/09/2016 08:17

We didn't have a car when I was a kid. It was fucking shit. Mind you, this was rainy Glasgow and there was no grocery delivery. But it's amazing, when I've been back home, we bring the car or hire a car and there's places that are like 5 or 10 minutes away from my old house by car that are fantastic, parks, stuff to do - that I just never ever went to as a kid because there wasn't a bus that went there. I think I was like 14 before I knew that we lived near Loch Lomond. In town was like a distant, once every couple of months thing - it's like 10 minutes in the car. When I lived in London I travelled further to get to the bloody supermarket.

LRDtheFeministDragon · 16/09/2016 08:17

You don't invariably have to be online, either, I think? It's a few years ago now, but my granny used to phone through online shops before she died.

I agree in the main that being online is more useful than being able to drive, and less dependent on physical abilities.

Birdsgottafly · 16/09/2016 08:18

"" So many elderly women looking after their spouses and unable to leave the house because they can't drive. ""

Why does not being able to drive, prevent you from going out? That's what Attendance Allowance, is for, it makes up for the extra cost of taxis etc. I'd say that's a Carers issues or lack of services, in your area.

I can't drive because of medical issues. There's places that I used to go in Wales, that I can't get to, but I've just stuck to places reachable by public transport (from Liverpool) and there's enough of them, that I haven't suffered. I've also been on coach day trips, some ran by a local Church, which I thought would be full of pensioners, but wasn't.

I'm hoping to be able to drive again, but only because I like camping. When I go to Cities with Christmas Markets, or 'Down South' etc,I go by train, even when I could drive.

I'd rather get the train to Edinburgh, or to Stratford-upon-Avon etc, than drive. All of these places, I've taken relatives/friends, who have health issues, or use Wheelchairs to.

There was a time were I'd think twice, because of the cost of a taxi, from the nearest station, but it's still a lot cheaper than running a car.

LRDtheFeministDragon · 16/09/2016 08:18

'phone through online shops' - daft phrase, what I mean is, she used to phone order a shop we'd have done online.

Adnerb95 · 16/09/2016 08:24

Seems to me the issue here is not about driving/not driving but about people taking a "principled" stance for maybe good reasons - environmental, etc etc - but then expecting other people to help them out by doing the very activity that they themselves avoid.
Which is slightly hypocritical, IMO.

Hmmnotkeen · 16/09/2016 08:28

I just think about days like today when it's pouring with rain I have two children and it would take and hour to walk to the tesco in my car it will take 10 minutes

But that's to do with where you live, not evidence that everyone needs to drive. There's a Nisa shop two minutes away from my house for the basics. There's a Tesco Express, Sainsburys Express, Lidl, Starbucks within 10. If I want a supermarket, there's two full sized ones within 15 minutes walk of my house.

Birdsgottafly · 16/09/2016 08:29

As for the shopping, I've saved a fortune having to get everything on a home delivery and really got organised, because of low energy levels, I've spent my time out of the house, doing 'fun' things, only and will never go back to spending time doing casual shopping.

Cagliostro · 16/09/2016 08:30

Meh. I don't drive but I don't expect plans to revolve around that. We get a lot of buses and trains, and the occasional taxi. No big deal at all

Togaparties · 16/09/2016 08:30

Do you think we need more traffic jams, more pollution, and more road work

It's my right to drive high performance thirsty cars as much as I like. Any tree huggers who disagree with that can go fuck themselves. What we need is more money invested in the existing road network and a new road building programme.