To not like the organ donation pressure?

[AtSea1979]

Don't get me wrong I fully support an opt out rather than in policy.
However DD (7 yo) has come home with a form and is asking lots of questions and it all seems a bit much. She has asked me what would I do if she died and whether I'd let them remove her organs etc and whether I'd do the same if it was me. The head cheerfully informed me they have an important letter we all should sign.
I find it all a bit bully tactics, surely it's a personal choice and nothing to do with anyone else.

I firmly believe that everyone should give this proper consideration and not duck out of it.

When we have done that we should all respect each other's decisions

I just can't get my head around declining receiving organ donation and rather letting a loved one or a child die than accepting the organ

Would you accept an organ donation for your DC?

Yes...I'm pro organ donation. If you read my earlier post, you'd see I mentioned they can have anything they want when I'm dead. I'd donate and accept.

What I said is I'd put the form in the bin!

Queenbean. I am fortunate not to have had to make that call. My child is an adult and can decide for himself.

I'm in Holland - the first stage of changing the law to opt out was passed today. I think it's a great change, I have opted in already but it took me years to get around to it (took all of about 25 seconds online).

There are however a remarkable number of people very upset by this. Apart from the usual religious objections and squeamish types there are a rather vocal group that are pro-donation but object to the idea of it being decided for you. That group I do not understand - one odd man on the radio was now going to opt out after all as he 'did not want the government telling him what to do'. So someone may be denied a life saving operation because he is sticking it to the man.

a rather vocal group that are pro-donation but object to the idea of it being decided for you

That is exactly how I feel.

The ds of a friend of mine died last week. He was 5. He needed a kidney.

One of my friends had a liver transplant last year and it saved his life.

One of my friends died when we were 12. Her parents donated her organs and saved and changed many lives.

Organ donation is miracle of modern science and technology. I don't understand why anyone WOULDN'T sign up. I am all for it. I won't need my body parts when I am dead. I love the thought that if I died suddenly my death need not be in vain for someone who has a second chance of a decent life.

My cousin died in an accident at a young age and my aunt and uncle have said they wished they'd donated his organs. But at the time they couldn't think straight and said no.
Although it's not nice to think about from that perspective it's better to think about now. And talk to your DC if old enough / you think they can have that discussion.

The problem is that a lot of people say they're open to donating, but don't take the time to sign up. Then if something happens to them the decision is left soley to their next of kin, many if whom say no (and who also overrule those who are registered, but that's another issue).

So campaigners may seem a little pushy, but that's because up to 5 people die every day whilst waiting for a transplant.

There is a shortage of organs and tissue. Not every death leaves organs suitable for donation, and not everything donated is suitable, so if someone whose organs would be suitable doesn't donate theirs then someone goes without.

And it's not just life and death. It's quality of life too. Without my cornea transplant I wouldn't be able to watch my DS growing up. When he was 4 I couldn't even read him a bedtime story. Now I can drive him all over and sit and help him with his homework.

I'm sorry if you feel it's bullying and pressurising, but I feel that YABU for feeling that way. Yes, you are being asked to consider a very difficult choice and it's a very emotive issue, but just because it makes you feel uncomfortable thinking about does not mean it's bullying. I don't like to think of my own death, and get extremely upset thinking about anything happening to DS, but we are both registered organ donors. And one of the best ways to normalise organ donation us to talk to children about it when they're young. DS knows I have part of a dead man in my eye. He also knows how happy the generous young man made Mummy and what special people my donor and his family are.

Formerbabe would you go so far as to opt out then?

I'd opt out if our current system changed.

I have no problem with donating organs but believe wholeheartedly that it should be a decision for my family to make, not the State. I've spoken to them about my preferences but if they don't feel they could honour them, I'm not exactly going to haunt them for it.

The end , for me, doesn't justify the means. Informed consent should remain something that is given freely, not coerced or emotionally blackmailed.

And while we're talking about donation, anyone overdue for giving blood ?

As science evolves, I believe organ donation will becoming obsolete. Organs will surely be able to be cultivated in a laboratory?

I hadn't thought of talking about organ donation with my two (primary age DCs). Reading this has made me think about it and I think I will discuss it.

I'd prefer an opt out rather than opt in policy. I'd like my DCs to share that view as I don't understand why some people could accept but not donate themselves.

Society 'tidies' away the very elderly and death is kept away from DCs. In reality they know and worry about it in the same way we did and didn't say anything when we were young. I'd prefer a more upfront approach with a view to actively enjoying life and death not being a silent threat, but something that can be discussed when DCs want to.

Everyone who has had medical treatment or who will have medical treatment has already benefitted from other people's donations whether it be blood, organs, bodies for experimentation, (think early studies and trials), and teaching .

We all depend on people doing that. We all accept treatment as our right and demand more - "Go to A&E", "Ask to see the GP again" "Don't take no for an answer" "Insist on a referral" - and yet STILL people say "I refuse to give back"

If you don't give - you shouldn't receive. But not easy to introduce or enforce.

I don't get the reluctance to donate. When I'm brain dead what's left is just a lump of meat and no good to me - I've gone&ceased to exist. If somebody can make use of my organs, or medical students can use what's left that's fine by me. Give someone else the chances I had eh?

Sadly, despite making my wishes VERY clear to my family, they'll probably insist on paying a few grand to stick it all in a box and burn it. What a waste.

Have a conversation now - please don't leave it to the death bed. I can imagine it will be difficult with some kids but if you sell it as being something that might happen when they are old I reckon it could be OK.

Also please remember that organ donation is only possible under certain circumstances - it probably won't happen Which is why it's important for as many people as possible to volunteer.

Formerbabe would you go so far as to opt out then?

I'm honestly not sure. Like I said, it's not the actual organ donation that bothers me, it's more the ethics of the opt out system that really unnerves me.

Bit it is a legitimate choice to give it a lot of thought and decide against donation. And it is not reasonable to fail to respect that decision, no matter how much you disagree with that decision

Opt out isn't the state deciding though, Blistory. Everyone can still make their own decision, it just reflects the idea that probably most people do want to, as most people would want to accept a transplant if needed. The State deciding would be a compulsory programme where organs were taken from everyone in their death, regardless of their wishes.

Yanbu, and I would be livid if my 7year old was pressured into thinking they should automatically agree to donate at school.

There is no way the school will have given the full facts, and rightly so at that age, but that's why young children have parents to make decisions for them. It is massively overstepping the mark for a school to give out donation forms, stuff like this is the job of parents. Fair enough to talk about the fact that organ donation happens, but to give out forms to fill in crosses the line. And I'm usually someone that will pretty much always give school the benefit of the doubt and outwardly support them, even if I don't inside.

It's not informed consent when you're dead. You can't consent to something if you're dead. Saying you can really does muddy the definition of consent.

YANBU

What bothers me is what would happen to the organs of those living outside of society?

Let's say a homeless person who has no ablity to opt out but wouldn't want to donate?

What about mentally ill people who can't make that decision? Would their organs just be taken anyway?

What if someone fills in the form to opt out, posts it then dies that night? Their organs are then taken before anyone even is aware of their wishes.

I believe that if you are medically able to donate & would accept a donation then you should donate.

If you don't want to donate, then you shouldn't accept a donation.

OP. - what's with throwing it out? Why didn't you fill it in so they've got your response to it?

I can't consent when I'm dead but my family can. I can however consent when I'm alive and don't agree that the default position should be that it is something I have to withdraw instead of give.

And seriously, do we really want to get into a position where we decide on who gets what medical treatment based on them having different values ?

If people are able to give blood but don't, should they never be entitled to have an operation ?

It's far more complex than just being a good thing to do.

formerbabe you can twist all those round the other way too, and have organs trashed hen they old gave saved lives. I feel that's a more serious consideration than the possibility that a dead person who will never know might have organs removed when they didn't want that.