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AIBU?

To not like the organ donation pressure?

267 replies

AtSea1979 · 15/09/2016 19:25

Don't get me wrong I fully support an opt out rather than in policy.
However DD (7 yo) has come home with a form and is asking lots of questions and it all seems a bit much. She has asked me what would I do if she died and whether I'd let them remove her organs etc and whether I'd do the same if it was me. The head cheerfully informed me they have an important letter we all should sign.
I find it all a bit bully tactics, surely it's a personal choice and nothing to do with anyone else.

OP posts:

Report

formerbabe · 15/09/2016 22:22

I'm not squeamish...when I'm dead, they can take what they want from me! I'm against the opt out system though as I strongly believe we should have autonomy over our bodies rather than the state.

thehousewife · 15/09/2016 22:22

As long as you are sure you would reject an organ for yourself, or child then sure bin the form. No one is forcing you to donate or accept an organ but In my opinion if your not willing to give you should not receive.

sentia · 15/09/2016 22:23

I don't think it's such a big deal. Once you're dead you don't need your organs so why does it matter. Bodily autonomy requires life.

I can see that it's a subject to approach with care with kids obviously, as they might fret about it, but death as an inevitable consequence of life really should be less of a taboo subject; this is one way to discuss it with a positive angle on it.

Skittlesss · 15/09/2016 22:24

If anything happened then you would be asked if you consented to their organs being donated... so that's why I don't think you should be allowed to sign a child up. When they're older they can make their own decision and sign up. What if you register them and they grow up and decide they don't want to donate?

Queenbean · 15/09/2016 22:25

It is sad that there are people who don't want their organs donated when they die. When you're dead, you ain't gonna use those eyes or that kidney so why does it make a difference

I'd love to know I helped someone or many people after I've gone

5OBalesofHay · 15/09/2016 22:26

Bullying people into donation they don't want to do:

'What possible objection could you have'

'Not being prepared to donate organs is repellent behaviour'

You may not believe that people have a right to refuse but they do.

formerbabe · 15/09/2016 22:26

Completely agree with Skittlesss

Gwenci · 15/09/2016 22:26

Honestly not trying to be goady, am genuinely interested, but for those posters saying they've opted out, or would not want to donate organs; would you accept a donation if needed to save your life or would the same scruples prevent you from doing that too? (NOT judging, genuinely interested.)

snototterly · 15/09/2016 22:26

Skilleless- what would happen? They would simply register a change of preference, not really very tricky

Cocklodger · 15/09/2016 22:28

Agree with 5O no one knows everyone's reasons for it but still they judge anyway.

Semiskimmedgreymatter · 15/09/2016 22:28

In or out, regardless of that, I trully believe 7yo is way too early to talk to children about this things.
Children that young are very impressionable and it can have a dramatic effect on their mental wellbeing, talking about death, having your organs taken out, etc. It can play a lot on their minds.

I will never forget one evening I was walking home with my father and he was telling me about the Bosnian war and how he might have to leave if he gets the call to join the army.
I was 10 at the time, and the sheer terror I fekt thinking I might lose him...I will never forget that. It never dawned on me that he could be taken away until then.
That's when I first developed ocd. Praying every hour and doing things to punish myself in a different way rather than lose my dad.

LittleBearPad · 15/09/2016 22:28

I really don't understand the decision not to donate. You'll be dead. You won't need your kidneys. Another person might. They will be alive when they might otherwise be dead.

5OBalesofHay · 15/09/2016 22:28

I would not accept an organ donation.

Skittlesss · 15/09/2016 22:29

Then we may as well have an OPT OUT society if people are making these choices for a child. I am absolutely for organ donation, but I would never make that decision for my children whilst they're still in a position to decide for themselves...whether now or in the future.

Queenbean · 15/09/2016 22:30

I appreciate that everyone has a choice, and not meaning to be goady at all, but for anyone who doesn't believe in it / would opt out, could you articulate why you wouldn't want to? I just can't understand why not so would be interested to hear why (without getting in to an argument!)

Would you decline receiving an organ should you need it as well?

LittleBearPad · 15/09/2016 22:30

I would not accept an organ donation

You'd rather die?

formerbabe · 15/09/2016 22:31

Semiskimmedgreymatter yes, that is very true. Even a flippant remark can terrify a child. I would not be happy to explain organ donation to my dc in terms of their organs. It is pointless anyway...If God forbid, anything happened to them, it is up to their parents to consent.

MilnersGold · 15/09/2016 22:31

All these people who don't agree.

If your child was waiting for a transplant, they would die without it, would your viewpoint change? Of course it would!!!!

That is why I am happy to donate whatever is needed & will do with my DC if the worst happens.

Heaven forbid I'm sat there with a small child dying of something that can be helped by a transplant, but no one wants to donate. It is a grim thought, very hard to discuss with people, but it should be talked about.

Thanks for raising this subject OP

Cocklodger · 15/09/2016 22:31

Well my organs would give you a disease I'm afraid littlebear

neonrainbow · 15/09/2016 22:31

So you're so ignorant you threw the form away without even reading it? I hope your kids never need an organ. Squeamishness shouldn't come into it.

5OBalesofHay · 15/09/2016 22:33

Yes

Queenbean · 15/09/2016 22:35

I would not accept an organ donation.

Youd rather die?

Yes

Would you accept organ donation for your child 50?

formerbabe · 15/09/2016 22:35

If my dc received a form like that, it would go straight in the bin.

WhatWouldCoachBombayDo · 15/09/2016 22:36

I'm in Wales, were opt out. We sat down me and DP and discussed our wishes for ourselves and DS. We decided we would donate our own but more importantly DS also, hundreds of children doe each year because organs are not available, if my beautiful boy were to sadly pass away I would want to share his joy and gift with other parents so they need not face the grief of loosing a child. Me and DP were in 100% agreement.

The good thing about opt out is it made families sit down and discuss it, it's not nice, far from it, to talk about your dearest dying, we both welled at the thought of DS passing away, but it was a important and informative discussion. Nothing squeamish about it.

Gwenci · 15/09/2016 22:37

If my dc received a form like that, it would go straight in the bin.

Would you accept an organ donation for your DC?

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