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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To let her strop about it and not share

182 replies

porridge90 · 15/09/2016 07:45

Bit of a ridiculous one but I'm not sure if I'm being unnecessarily cruel. My dd is 2.3 and she LOVES juice. I know I will be flamed for it but I cannot get her to drink water so she has squash. (Yes I make sure I brush her teeth etc and she never has it in bed). The problem I have is that she guzzles it. If you give her a cup with it in she will down the whole thing in seconds and still ask for more. She would just drink all day if I let her.

I have to be strict as she can fill herself up on juice and then refuse to eat, eating is already a bit of an issue with her being really fussy.

Now, whenever I have a drink she has started throwing a massive fit that she wants it, even if she has just finished hers.

Am I being cruel to just let her cry about it? I don't want her thinking she can always just take my food and drink and I can't just time our drinks together, as she will just drink hers really fast and scream for mine. Part of the problem I guess is that I too don't really like water so I drink juice and that's why she wants it. Is it part of being a parent that I have to hide when eating/drinking? Or that I can only drink things she doesn't like so I don't have to share?

I sound like a 2 year old myself I know with this issue, but it is really starting to annoy me...

OP posts:
SnugglySnerd · 15/09/2016 10:32

I also have a 2yo who asks for squash. She has it once or twice a day, made very weak. Recently I've been drinking water with slices of lemon in. Turns out DD loves this so I make her her own now, no sugar! Worth a try?

thenightsky · 15/09/2016 10:33

My DS was a fiend for drinking gallons and needing nappy changes every hour. I'm sure it was more of a habit than thirst. He used to guzzle down a whole cup of diluted squash and the wave the cup around shouting 'drink, drink'.

It was a bit of a slog breaking this habit, but we did it by distracting him with other things like reading or crayoning or a postman pat video.

3awesomestars · 15/09/2016 10:33

I would just give her another drink in her own cup. Why wouldn't you? It's not a problem to have a drink with you all the time, you may find she finds her own drinking pattern and doesn't guzzle, just sips as she needs it.

Mine always drank squash, very weak and sugar free. With meals only water or milk.

TeacupDrama · 15/09/2016 10:35

I am a dentist don't swap squash for flavoured water no added sugar squash or fruit shoot type stuff has approx 5g sugar per 250ml/ bottle while flavoured water as up to 20g sugar per bottle it surprises most people but most flavoured water is much more sugary than diluting juice obviously i would recommend milk or water but flavoured water like smoothies etc have far more sugar than people realise

toastymarshmallow · 15/09/2016 10:35

I haven't read all the replies, but I had to post because we had this exact same issue with DD2 when she was 2. Gulping down juice all day and then massive gushes of wee that the nappy couldn't cope with.

We worried about diabetes and I took her to the GP. They did do the finger prick test but the GP said that diabetes in children presents differently and is usually a more overall failure to thrive/general sickness rather than the symptoms we would generally think of in adults. GP wasn't concerned at all and we were sent on our way.

Our solution to deal with it was to reduce how much she had in her cup. So I started only putting a third in. Then if she wanted more a while later I knew she had only had a third of a cup and not a full cup.

(I think she was using the cup like a dummy, despite never taking to a dummy as a baby.)

She was happy with being able to finish the cup, and I was happy as the wee issue was reduced. If she cried for my drink or food I never gave in, she soon gave up with that. Be consistent.

She is almost 4 now, still loves her juice, but in a small glass now. Little and often and she is used to it.

milkyface · 15/09/2016 10:38

Is nobody getting that the op gives her daughter a drink at the same time she has one?

So they both get a drink. Dd drinks it and then wants more?

She's not being refused juice.

I don't think giving her glass after glass is good because as op says she then won't eat because she's full of juice.

I'd just keep saying no you can't have mine you've had your own, and then only water afterwards.

I don't think it's cruel at all.

Eg if you had a packet of sweets at the same time as dd, she finished hers but you were still eating, you wouldn't give her another packet to eat would you?!

Original poster
porridge90 · 15/09/2016 10:39

I feel like I have definitely explained my reasons for not just giving her another drink 3awesomestars. Her drinking pattern has never been to sip, always guzzle. I do use sugar free, it's possibly not as weak as it should be though. She won't drink milk either. Although I can sometimes get her to drink a homemade milkshake.

OP posts:
DextersMistress · 15/09/2016 10:39

My ds was exactly the same, was obsessed with drinks. He's nearly 4 now and has pretty much grown out of it although he still drinks really quickly. I had to be strict, milk first and last thing, one juice per day then just water. I let him pick a new cup himself and kept it topped up with fresh water. Good luck.

IHulaNaked · 15/09/2016 10:41

Weird thread.

Original poster
porridge90 · 15/09/2016 10:42

That's really interesting toastymarshmallow, my dd never took a dummy either so perhaps uses hers for comfort too. I'm hoping that fixing the squash things makes it easier to fix the eating. One step at a time...

OP posts:
Original poster
porridge90 · 15/09/2016 10:43

Hmm thank you for your valuable input IHulaNaked

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 15/09/2016 10:45

OP, until fairly recently (the last 2 years or so) I really didn't like water either.

Then I started buying large bottles of water, a bag of ice (about £1 in the supermarket) and a couple of fresh lemons - sliced and stored in a tupperware box.

Now I can't get enough of it and nearly always choose it over squash/juice, which if you'd told me that a couple of years ago I would never have believed you Grin

As an aside, my skin (which was always dry) looks great now and I can't remember the last time I had a headache.

Do you think it's worth a try? You could start with a few slices of lemon and squeeze them into the glass to start with.

WorraLiberty · 15/09/2016 10:46

Oh I meant to add...I rarely bother with the lemon now. I just love water the way it is (as long as it's ice cold).

Original poster
porridge90 · 15/09/2016 10:47

Definitely Worra. I like the sound of adding mint too that a pp mentioned.

OP posts:
milkyface · 15/09/2016 10:49

I agree with worra too.

I never used to drink water until I was pregnant and everything else gave me heartburn. It tastes 10 x better cold.

PurplePidjin · 15/09/2016 10:55

I get excessive thirst - and headaches and other stuff - from artificial sweeteners. They turn ds1 into a raging brat, and my dad gets heart palpitations.

I suggest you try heavily diluted fruit juice and see if she drinks as much. I have mine half and half with water, my 3yo has about 1/5 juice.

I know what sugar does to my body and teeth. There's no hard evidence of the effects of sweeteners.

Original poster
porridge90 · 15/09/2016 10:59

I'm already hating life. She is just losing her mind that I won't let her have squash. I've told her we haven't got any. She's not stopped crying, hiring, whining, throwing and generally being a 2 year old since. It's too early for gin right? (For me not her).

OP posts:
MrsCookieMonster78 · 15/09/2016 11:14

Hi Porridge

Haven't read the whole thread so may have been suggested but could you put water in the sippy cup so she has it there is she needs it and only give juice in a open cup (might be a few spills initially). It might reduce the speed at which she drinks and also she identifies one cup for water and one for juice. And maybe limit the juice to 2-3 cups per days ideally with food. If she is thirsty she will drink the water.
When we started diving DD squash in open cups she stopped having it all together and eventually when she started again she had a lot less.

Rattusn · 15/09/2016 11:16

I don't think worra 's suggestion is particularly helpful, as I don't think it would help a child drink water. In fact, all the children I know actively avoid iced water.

nagsandovalballs · 15/09/2016 11:17

Keep going, she is an addict and is withdrawing. This is a massive test for you and her but remember she won't come to any harm and the long term benefits are worth it.

datingbarb · 15/09/2016 11:18

My dd 2 years wants anything in a glass she goes crazy and climbs, grabs and screams..... My way around this is to drink everything out of a mug as she isn't interested in my cups of tea so everything coke, the cheeky wine is drank from a mug if she's around

toastymarshmallow · 15/09/2016 11:20

I really cannot get as worked up about juice as to think of it as a an addiction fgs.

OP, we all know that juice isn't great, water is better etc. But honestly sometimes you need to pick your battles and forcing her to go straight from juice to water seems like a step too far.

PepsiPenguin · 15/09/2016 11:21

I have a very rare condition and have to drink pretty much constantly, I find plain water utterly dull, so have over the years tried to jazz it up in various ways. Agree with making things cold, everything I drink has ice in.

I have a lot of flavoured water that I make myself - cucumber and mint in a bottle of Evian, Slices of Oranges with mint, lemon and mint (I like mint :) ) I also buy fruity tea which I put three cups into a mug, squeeze the living daylights out of it and put that in a glass bottle topped up with Evian and put in the fridge.

Maybe if she sees a "posh" bottle coming out of the fridge she may want that more?

minipie · 15/09/2016 11:21

Right, this is standard 2 year old, you know you have to be firm and not give in right? This is where she learns you're in charge and tantrums don't get her what she wants still teaching this to my nearly 4 year old sigh

bastardneighbour · 15/09/2016 11:24

Maybe get her a special straw like the colourful curly wurly ones? They have some really cute ones in Tiger at the moment.

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