To think some commenters on the AIBU threads are just bitchy

[Wittowoo]

Some posters really are just plain nasty. Bitchy keyboard warriors. I'm actually gobsmacked by the level of vitriol in some of them. Why do people do it?

Wouldn't it be easier to leave and find something more agreeable?

Is this the kind of thing you mean, OP

AIBU to say I quite like some of the vitriol - especially the more inventive stuff?

queen I get that, I really do. But I have posted on a couple of occasions and just those few responses of reassurance has helped me a lot. If I'm low, and someone knocks me lower, just for kicks. That's harsh. If they are rational and showing a different side to things that is helpful.

If I'm honest I think a lot of posters here agree with a lot of the bitchy comments made, they just too "scared" to comment themselves for fear of backlash!

YANBU

Some posters seem to forget that there is a human being behind the original thread.

Indeed acasualobserver I'm not remotely invested in the opinions of people i have never met. Inam interested iin the wider implications of what this sort of behaviour means for the sort of world my daughter will grow up in tho...

someone knocks me lower, just for kicks. That's harsh

Agree that would be harsh, but you can't be sure of someone's motivations - things can get very heated and seem personal (they did on the various Brexit threads, for example) but sometimes that's just people who are vehemently opposed to your view of the world.

Because people are truly honest on this site and people are often a lot darker under the social veneer than you would ever know about in real life.

Also it can be a catharsis. If something really annoys you in real life but you never get to express that then you come on here and someone says they do it, then you can be taking out pent up annoyance/aggression on that poster which you would not normally be able to express.

You can't honestly be surprised? Human nature in anonymity is in general very different simply because a lot of our 'civilised' behaviours are dictated by social norms and constructs. Without the consequence of people thinking 'you' are a bitch, then people will express wherever unfiltered emotion comes to mind. No real life impact at all (there can be to the recipient of course but posters don't see that consequence).

wasonthelist surely comments like, "does anyone really care ?" are fairly explicitly motivated from a less than positive place?

MinonsMovie True, but they are hardly a personal attack are they?

I find all those "don't you have anything better to worry about" comments quite funny - they have a certain inherent irony don't they?

Yanbu op. In fact I dont bother with mn much anymore for this reason.

Yabu for anything apparently these days. I always think two sides to every story, shades of grey n all.

Inam interested iin the wider implications of what this sort of behaviour means for the sort of world my daughter will grow up in tho...

I'm sorry that just sounds like sententious guff.

AIBU lets me view a range of opinions (and ways of behaving) that are outside my normal narrow zone of interaction - and I value that over the discomfort of some bitchyness.

Because people are truly honest on this site and people are often a lot darker under the social veneer than you would ever know about in real life.

I disagree with this. 2/3 years ago yes, now a lot of replies are just bonkers.

It's a real shame, mn has made me over the years carefully consider my thoughts/ attitudes about lots of things. Its boring now though with the mindless yabu yabu yabu yabu.

I find all those "don't you have anything better to worry about" comments quite funny - they have a certain inherent irony don't they?

Ooh I like that!

When I see a particularly nasty post I just think, "well they're obviously not a nice human", and move on.

Some people get a kick out of being nasty to others-it's usually because they're unhappy irl.

mykingdomforbrie I think you've explained it very insightfully. I guess I am surprised because I've never used anonymous forums before. Surprised and saddened actually.

I don't think it's bitchiness. I think it's just people being honest in a way that they can't IRL because we pretty much have to see the same people all the time so you have to moderate your opinions and let stuff go. On MN you don't...

I do get fed up with people moaning that posters on "their" thread should stop commenting on things that the OP doesn't think is the main point, or generally disagreeing with them. It's not mean to disagree.

whitwoo I'm newish too and it is surprising but I'm finding it insightful. I feel more empowered to support dd when that time comes that she goes online because it's not a totally alien place anymore iyswim.

I was a bit surprised at the reactions to the poster who expressed forthright dislike for some public artwork - that thread so swamped with peple telling the OP how unkind they were and how much the poor artist would be affected that the title was amended. I am a little concerned that we are ready to heap opprobrium onto people for having an honestly held opinion - and that worries me more.

Fuck off you bitch

OhhBetty Well you took your flaming time

OP is right.

There are polite ways of disagreeing with opinions on here. Sadly, many posters prefer to be rude and, umm, witty. Then they do that 'Oh, I thought you wanted opinions' thing, as if the only way of disagreeing with someone is to imply they're stupid/sneer at them/make snide comments.

Then you get the next contingent who patiently explain that this is what AIBU is like, as if it's an incontrovertible fact of nature and not merely dependent on a nasty mob mentality.

Bit like the way this thread is going...

I'm new on here, haven't changed my name or whatever.

This is at least the third thread I've read this week by newbies surprised by AIBU.

Perhaps AIBU needs a health warning for the uninitiated?